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Ask HN: Tips for Hackers having Kids?

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Ask HN: Tips for Hackers having Kids?

#1
In about 6 months I've got a lovely bundle of joy coming into the world, needless to say I'm extremely excited.

Like many Hackers I work fairly long hours, especially weekends (sometimes when I get my best work done).

I'd love to hear some tips from fellow hackers who have had kids & some tips on managing the transition to a more family focused life, without losing sight of goals & milestones that you have for your startup.

Re: Ask HN: Tips for Hackers having Kids?

#2
1. Your priorities will change. You're not the same person after you have had a kid. But, you will find that the pressure on your available hours will help you figure out how to work smarter and triage your worklist better. You will have to work fewer hours, but your productivity will adjust to compensate to a large degree.

2. Hack when they sleep. Pray to any gods you may have that the one you get does that plentifully and regularly :-)

Good luck!

Re: Ask HN: Tips for Hackers having Kids?

#3
Kids come first!

Spouses second.

Computers third.

I'm sure you already figured that one out but I still have to remind myself periodically when I'm in to something interesting so I figured it wouldn't hurt to repeat it.

Get up an hour or two before your kids do so you can get some work done when you're still fresh (assuming your kids don't get up at 6 am :) ).

Re: Ask HN: Tips for Hackers having Kids?

#4
Having kids has been a great change in my life. My kids are 4 and 6 now and I'm loving being a dad. I can still work long hours, but I split the hours to spend time with them. I don't have the time I'd like to have to dig into new technologies, new tools, etc, but I feel I'm a good dad. Starting to do some science experiments with my kids which is very cool.

What has worked for me is to get an early start in the morning so I can cut off work at a decent hour. Then I often will put in hours after the kids go to bed. Doing this I can still put in fairly long hours. Important thing is to review your goals and milestones and make adjustments to the time required to hit them. If the schedule was created assuming 60-70 hours a week, you will need to rethink the deadlines.

On the family front, one thing that has worked out really we for my wife and me is that we each have one night a week free, where the other is responsible for the kids. This one afternoon/evening is a nice relief. I use it to go grab some drinks with friends, play golf, hack on a project, watch a movie, etc. We both find that we are better parents (and spouses) when we get some down time.

Re: Ask HN: Tips for Hackers having Kids?

#5
I am more of a builder than a pure entrepreneur, so YMMV.

I quit my job when my son was seven months old, took a month off, then went back to work three days a week. I'm a stay at home dad the other two.

Eight months later, this seems very, very easily to have been the best decision I've ever made.

Re: Ask HN: Tips for Hackers having Kids?

#6
post #3

Kids come first! Spouses second. Computers third. I'm sure you already figured that one out but I still have to remind myself periodically when I'm in to something interesting so I figured it wouldn't hurt to repeat it. Get up an hour or two before your kids do so you can get some work done when you're still fresh (assuming your kids don't get up at 6 am :) ).

Why kids first, spouses second?

Re: Ask HN: Tips for Hackers having Kids?

#9
post #6
post #3

Kids come first! Spouses second. Computers third. I'm sure you already figured that one out but I still have to remind myself periodically when I'm in to something interesting so I figured it wouldn't hurt to repeat it. Get up an hour or two before your kids do so you can get some work done when you're still fresh (assuming your kids don't get up at 6 am :) ).

Why kids first, spouses second?

Because they, as parents, are entirely responsible for the kid's very existence. Adults are, to a large degree, responsible for themselves, much as we may love them.

Re: Ask HN: Tips for Hackers having Kids?

#10
post #6
post #3

Kids come first! Spouses second. Computers third. I'm sure you already figured that one out but I still have to remind myself periodically when I'm in to something interesting so I figured it wouldn't hurt to repeat it. Get up an hour or two before your kids do so you can get some work done when you're still fresh (assuming your kids don't get up at 6 am :) ).

Why kids first, spouses second?

I'm not doubting that it should be that way, I was more curious as to the reasoning. Downvoters are quick on the trigger, aren't they...
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