Live data from Hacker News

Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

economist.com

161–170 of 230 posts

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#161
post #4

These days I use facebook just for its messenger. On my computer, I skip facebook.com and go to messenger.com directly. On mobile (I refuse to install their apps), I go to mbasic.facebook.com because Facebook doesn't let me access the messenger tab in the mobile facebook website, nagging me to install their messenger app. Messenger is a really useful tool to stay connected. Pretty much everyone I know is available th…

> Messenger is a really useful tool to stay connected. Pretty much everyone I know is available there, so using it is a net positive for me.

I fully agree. I use messenger more than texting. Peoples phone #'s or email addresses might change but Facebook stays constant. This tool's especially useful on Android, where my iPhone friends are hesitant to text me bc of the dreaded green texts.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#162

Having directed this to my teenaged younger sibling (he is intelligent and expressive) he explained in his view, teenagers have a poor prognosis for their career prospects and are aware of this. Technology allows them to be aware that life doesn’t look good for them, that they cannot look forward to retirement, to a stable long term career, that the amount of education and debt they will need to accrue is ever-increa…

>their success in this society will rely on using and stepping on others who will now have less as a result

That reflects a fundamental misunderstanding of economics. While there are indeed predatory business models where this is true - casinos etc. - most highly successful people and businesses become successful by creating value, not siphoning it from others.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#163

I find instagram to be, by far, the most damaging to my mental health of all the social networks. The explore feed must be optimized to relentlessly show "all the people I wish I could be but will never be."

Instagram was never my favorite, but I could at least get behind the old news feed sorting by "most recent". I recently deleted the app bc of the new sorting algorithm, which I'm not a fan of. At least Facebook gives the option to switch the news feed sorting back to "most recent".

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#164

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Can you expand on this? I don't really understand how x lead to y as i don't have much idea about social media addiction at all or its effects.

We moved to a new city. I work full time (from home) as a SWE. She is a stay at home mom. She met new people on IG in our new city, made friends. I thought it was great. My wife has a hole deep inside her from years of childhood abuse. She has no career, is early 20s like myself, and has yet to figure herself out. As the months went by, she filled that hole more and more with her connections on IG and less with our f…

I don't think it's the social media. If she was abused as a child, then she is dealing with levels of emotional pain we cannot imagine. Being in a relationship with someone like that takes a superhuman level of patience. No one understands how much child abuse wrecks the psychology of a person until it's their immediate family.

It sounds like you've been a good husband to her. Women don't forget good treatment, even you feel like it's not being recognized. If she was abused by a man, it's possible she sees all men as villains, including you, as a consequence of the trauma, and that's not your fault.

You have to take care of yourself first. Put on your oxygen mask before helping others, etc. But it's obvious you still care about her and that's commendable.

Don't rely on forums like this for advice. People here tend to be bitter and antisocial. Stick with the therapy. It sounds like you are emotionally dependent on her, and that's not helping. If your therapist isn't helping you, try another one. Your goal should be fixing you. Not her.

Also: you keep mentioning how you work from home. If you do get back together (which it sounds like you won't, but stranger things have happened), do yourself a favor and get an on-site job. Your relationship will improve instantly.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#165
post #117

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It seems like you think art has no "intellectualism". IG is a great way to see contemporary fashion and art around the world in real time.

Pictures of food, dogs, and people lounging on some old guy's yacht who they met through tinder doesn't really count as intellectual art. Also merely photographing someone else's art doesn't quite count as being an artist. That's just cheap mimicry.

Back at the time when people read books and journals, they read junk books (dime novels) and junk journals mostly. And a lot of socializing was drinking beer and having empty talk about football and that girl.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#166

Having directed this to my teenaged younger sibling (he is intelligent and expressive) he explained in his view, teenagers have a poor prognosis for their career prospects and are aware of this. Technology allows them to be aware that life doesn’t look good for them, that they cannot look forward to retirement, to a stable long term career, that the amount of education and debt they will need to accrue is ever-increa…

>their success in this society will rely on using and stepping on others who will now have less as a result That reflects a fundamental misunderstanding of economics. While there are indeed predatory business models where this is true - casinos etc. - most highly successful people and businesses become successful by creating value, not siphoning it from others.

Highly successful businesses like Apple, which are closely related to Foxconn and the horrors of labor there. That we know many elements that go into our technology may be sourced from dubious environments, unsafe working conditions, potentially human rights violations and war. That’s what he meant when I asked him. By consuming anything in the system one is contributing to the systems oppression internationally, and there isn’t an easy way to stop.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#167

If you take a train or a bus, or are in any other public space, you may notice that a bunch of people (young and old) spend their time staring into their phones. And most of the time, if you glance at their phone, you'll see they're on Instagram. They're staring into this machine fantasizing about some image of how great life is, meanwhile their real life is passing them by. And they wonder why they're not getting al…

You realize back in the older days people did the exact same thing with books and newspapers? At least with phones we can talk with people we’re meeting up with.

People also thought the same thing with television, and they were largely right about television. They were also right about some forms of print media: next time you go to the grocery store, look at the celebrity gossip magazines in the checkout line. They're basically Instagram for older people. They certainly take advantage of the same human impulse to avarice and escapism.

The internet is an amazing tool to connect with people. It's also an tool for marketers and corporations to mediate friendships, romantic relationships, and consumption of media in ways that are far more effective and inescapable than anything that came before it.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#168
post #95

Comparatives are too easy to draw these days because of social media. Everyone has an image of the most popular/successful person in their face all the time. It's hard not to compare yourself! And when you fall short in comparison, it makes you feel unhappy. Then it makes you feel like you need some moonshot idea to elevate your standards - that puts pressure on you and invariably drives anxiety. I see growing levels…

I still don't see how comparing to success causes unhappiness. This theory is too convenient and is spreading like a disease.

When you see someone who is popular and successful, the normal and healthy response is admiration and inspiration. If you fail to have your own wins of some kind, then this could be the source of unhappiness, but that is because you didn't have a win, not because others did.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#169

Having directed this to my teenaged younger sibling (he is intelligent and expressive) he explained in his view, teenagers have a poor prognosis for their career prospects and are aware of this. Technology allows them to be aware that life doesn’t look good for them, that they cannot look forward to retirement, to a stable long term career, that the amount of education and debt they will need to accrue is ever-increa…

>their success in this society will rely on using and stepping on others who will now have less as a result That reflects a fundamental misunderstanding of economics. While there are indeed predatory business models where this is true - casinos etc. - most highly successful people and businesses become successful by creating value, not siphoning it from others.

The adolescent was likely referring to a broader social perspective, not consumer oriented business models.

The adolescent here could be observing a short term trend relative to an underlying bigger picture. People are competitive by nature and the modern information age may be amplifying this for them, at least in perception.

Re: Teenagers are growing more anxious and depressed

#170
I'm sad to say that I think this is the intended result of social media from the corporate/business point of view.

Instead of TV, with its advertisements being broad and un-targeted, people are building their own hell by searching for what they want. Then the machines learn get an idea what they want, and show it to them. Part of the nature of advertising is convincing people they need these things, otherwise they will be "out" (old, poor, unpopular, etc.).

Instead of maybe one ad in an hour (or a day) triggering you, you're bombarded with reminders of what could be, if you could afford it. Of course the promises are unrealistic and easily broken, but I don't think most people have the mental tools to realize that at the time.

There's all this great positive content out there too! Educational videos, science, all that. But it seems the impact of bad things outweighs the good, which just seems to be human nature - we regret things a lot more than we are thankful for what we do not regret. Even if they aren't selling anything to us.

It's true that we're comparing across the world now, and there will be someone better than you. But that's almost always been true, although for a lot of the time you didn't know who was better, or they were simply some distant name written in a book, easily forgotten. For example, I think few will rival Aristotle, but nobody seems to care about that.

Fear and regret are powerful motivators, but dangerous ones as well. If you can't act for some reason (lack of money, lack of opportunity/ability) it just seems to gnaw at you until you snap. I don't think it's any different than TV, except now amplified via personalization.

Post reply on HN