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Please Stop Calling Everything That Frustrates You Emotional Labor

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Re: Please Stop Calling Everything That Frustrates You Emotional Labor

#21
Now and then a new idea becomes prominent, people argue about it in public, and then move on to the next thing. What's interesting to me is what remains. For example, the wars over atheism or rationalism are long past, so now I can call myself an atheist and rationalist while keeping only the good parts. With emotional labor, people might break lances right now but I can already tell that the idea will stick with me. Managing other people's emotions and maintaining good vibes is an amazing skill, many programmers are lacking in it, and learning it will almost certainly make you happier both at work and at home. Picking up some share of emotional labor doesn't just help the other person - I'm firmly convinced that it helps you more.

Re: Please Stop Calling Everything That Frustrates You Emotional Labor

#22

Putting aside the misuse of the term, "emotional labor" as a problem strikes me as possibly the least significant of all problems faced by any people group in all of history. I wonder why we spend so much time and energy tackling these kinds of issues when there are so many more pressing problems (for example, the workplace fatality gap). If "emotional labor" is the next frontier for feminism, then feminism is a dist…

Really? Half the population has had to continuously, thanklessly, and systemically lug around the emotional weight of the other half for centuries, and you consider this a distraction? I'd say this issue is at the very core of gender politics. The more we're aware of it, the happier we'll be in our relationships and our lives. I've learned it's a massive blind spot in my own emotional intelligence and I'm thankful my…

I'm not sure I understand the problem...

It seems that, according to this line of thinking women take this 'emotional labor' upon themselves, innately, while men do not. That is, men have not asked women to do this -- women naturally do it.

Why, then, should the burden be placed upon the man to alleviate this self-infliction of the woman? Why shouldn't the woman try to approach this issue more like the man? Or perhaps they should meet halfway. Either way, why is it expected that it is an issue that men need to address and adapt and not the other way around?

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