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How to Destroy Someone's Life or They called me a child pornographer

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Re: How to Destroy Someone's Life or They called me a child pornographer

#161

Post by asmithmd1 »

infinite8s wrote: post #156
Sukotto wrote: post #97

Earlier quoted context omitted.

For me it's the #2 nightmare. Leaving the baby in the car in the sun is #1.

As a new parent, I can't imagine how anyone would ever accidentally leave a child in their car.

I think rear-facing car seats kill more infants than they save. How many children survive a car crash only because they were facing backwards should be weighed against the number of children who die each summer because the parents forgot them.

If the child is front facing, your rear-view mirror will be filled with your child's face. But imagine the child falls asleep in a rear facing car seat after you have been up all night with them. It happens every summer to good parents.

Re: How to Destroy Someone's Life or They called me a child pornographer

#162

Post by dedward »

cagey wrote: post #154
Confusion wrote: post #34

Earlier quoted context omitted.

(at best they were all "just doing their jobs", just like concentration camp guards) Quoted for truth. This is not an invocation of Godwin's law, but the closest possible analogy, as these bureaucrats make the exact same repugnant decisions someone like Eichmann made. They fully well know they ruin the lives of many innocent folks; at least half the cases turn out to have been nothing. The problem is not 'the governm…

The problem is not 'the government' or 'society'. The problem is our neighbors: citizens like you and me... I fail to see how my neighbors caused this problem (aside from demonstrating a tendency to vote for legislators who themselves had a latent tendency to write the laws creating the bureaucracy which assailed us). The problem is in fact those legislators (and a system that offers minimal checks on the legislation…

As a colleague who lived through conflict in Serbia once told me of a conversation he had with an opposition soldier with a gun.... long story short - the soldier said "I have no choice, I'm just following orders"... and my friend said "YOU are the only person in this situation who DOES have a choice - YOU are the one holding the gun."

IT's all too easy for people to forget they are individuals and capable of individual choices (which yes, have consequences.)

Re: How to Destroy Someone's Life or They called me a child pornographer

#163

Post by tptacek »

cookiecaper wrote: post #141
tptacek wrote: post #120

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Your school system doesn't "file a report" until TEN CONSECUTIVE ABSENCES? That's negligent. In ours, a truancy report is filed and the police are involved after ten cumulative absences or tardies throughout the entire semester. (I found this out the 8th time I managed to drop my kids off 1 minute late).

Wow, the tardy thing is excessive imo. My wife informs me that the 10 days thing was because the child was in kindergarten. My wife had gone down to the school and talked to the teachers about the matter so she knows more about that than I do. Apparently kindergarten isn't considered a "real thing" or something. If the guidelines are stricter for 1st grade, and I hope they are, then hopefully there will be more invol…

The tardy thing is excessive. Getting a social work case opened up because you get out the door a couple minutes late is nonsense. It would be funny, and not at all surprising, if people who's kids are missing weeks of school at a time are having less trouble with the authorities; not giving a shit about anything is a good innoculation against social services, which is part of the tragedy of how these programs tend to work out.

Re: How to Destroy Someone's Life or They called me a child pornographer

#164

Post by kls »

_pi wrote: post #160
kls wrote: post #130

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Bingo, I live in mortal fear of DCF and our next encounter (that how crazy the paranoia is). I pray every day, even now, that I am off their radar. I don't want anything to do with them. I don't want their money (I have exited 3 start-ups, I have enough, I am not FU rich but enough that I don't want to bring their heat). I just want to give them a wide birth and stay away from them.

I understand your predicament, I myself don't have kids but I understand what it would feel like to take your children away. But I also understand that you have time and a lawyer who already knew about the case. I'd ask him if there's a statute of limitations on this sort of thing. You may have a chance to fight back, and at least help sort out this unjust system.

I was born and raised in Florida, all of my family is in Florida we have been here for 13 generations. My grandmother's uncle was the first US citizen born in Florida after it became part of the US. I am the caretaker of my grandparents (the only reason I never moved to the Valley). Other than the Valley, Florida is the only place that I would want to live. The only way I would have ever considered taking action against them would have been to leave Florida and be out of their reach. It was really not an option given my history and my grandparents needs. They are an organization known for their retribution against individuals who try to oppose them. They are extreme powerful and not really an organization to be trifled with unless you are willing to endure some extreme hardships in the name of principals.

If I had taken action, it would have been less for money and more to force their hand at bringing the wife that made the allegations up on felony criminal charges. That is a personal vendetta of mine and would served no good for my family, so now I just let sleeping dogs lie. As I said, I give them a wide birth and try to avoid any contact with that organization.

Re: How to Destroy Someone's Life or They called me a child pornographer

#165

Post by Hexstream »

jacquesm wrote: post #83
_pi wrote: post #20

Earlier quoted context omitted.

First off, I am so sorry for your experience that sounds completely terrible. Second, was there nothing your lawyer could do, such as file an injunction against the DCF? Is there any way you can be compensated (in any way) for your experience? If there was would you take it?

The problem with that avenue is that this sort of agency is very vengeful and they have the power to make your life very miserable. So if after you've won your injunction they find half an excuse to 'intervene' again they'll definitely do so. It's rare that I would advocate to just let it be but in this case that would seem to me to be the safest option. Pick your battles.

Gee, seems like Scientology's got some competition, there.

Re: How to Destroy Someone's Life or They called me a child pornographer

#166

Post by bpyne »

pyre wrote: post #96
c1sc0 wrote: post #53

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'll add to that by saying it's a sign of our times as well. I was educated with material from the 60's / 70's & having nudity in school textbooks was perfectly normal then, including shared nudity between adults & children.

I almost have a feeling that in the US we are building up to a Hilter-esque take-over of the government. It's just taking a lot longer than it took the Nazis because the times aren't as extreme, and our system of government was better designed to resist such things...

It's troubling that you make this observation. A friend of mine did his Ph.D. in East European studies before the Berlin Wall fell. He told me 15 years ago, over a few Newcastles, that "the US is ripe for fascism". I find the thought terrifying still. Let's hope the US political process keeps such a Dark Age from occurring.

EDIT: Corrected typo: Lets -> Let's

Re: How to Destroy Someone's Life or They called me a child pornographer

#167

Post by c1sc0 »

pyre wrote: post #96
c1sc0 wrote: post #53

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'll add to that by saying it's a sign of our times as well. I was educated with material from the 60's / 70's & having nudity in school textbooks was perfectly normal then, including shared nudity between adults & children.

I almost have a feeling that in the US we are building up to a Hilter-esque take-over of the government. It's just taking a lot longer than it took the Nazis because the times aren't as extreme, and our system of government was better designed to resist such things...

Interesting, I started reading Mein Kampf a while ago because I sometimes feel like we are living in similar times. Let's just hope that no one charismatic enough to make a difference stands up. Or if one does, let it be quick & painless. In my darker moments I often think "This would be a damn fine planet to live on given current technology and a few billion humans less."

Re: How to Destroy Someone's Life or They called me a child pornographer

#168

Post by protomyth »

dedward wrote: post #162
cagey wrote: post #154

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The problem is not 'the government' or 'society'. The problem is our neighbors: citizens like you and me... I fail to see how my neighbors caused this problem (aside from demonstrating a tendency to vote for legislators who themselves had a latent tendency to write the laws creating the bureaucracy which assailed us). The problem is in fact those legislators (and a system that offers minimal checks on the legislation…

As a colleague who lived through conflict in Serbia once told me of a conversation he had with an opposition soldier with a gun.... long story short - the soldier said "I have no choice, I'm just following orders"... and my friend said "YOU are the only person in this situation who DOES have a choice - YOU are the one holding the gun." IT's all too easy for people to forget they are individuals and capable of individ…

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has." - Margaret Mead

Re: How to Destroy Someone's Life or They called me a child pornographer

#169

Post by cagey »

slantyyz wrote: post #140
jgoewert wrote: post #131

I remember reading this when it first came out and reminded me of my own run in with DFS right around the same time. Stopping real child abuse is important, but the system is so lopsided that merely being accused makes you the criminal. People spread the rumor of you being investigated by DFS, they don't spread the rumor of you being cleared. My run-in was no where near as large of scale, but aggrivating, humiliating…

Neighbors can be the worst people. You think you bought your dream house, and someone moves in next door who is a total nightmare and makes you feel completely trapped and miserable.

And if they're there only because of "Section 8" funding you get to revel in the knowledge that it's your tax dollars "at work" subsidizing the mayhem next door! [BTDT] Hey, another bureaucracy at work!

Re: How to Destroy Someone's Life or They called me a child pornographer

#170

Post by MartinCron »

infinite8s wrote: post #156
Sukotto wrote: post #97

Earlier quoted context omitted.

For me it's the #2 nightmare. Leaving the baby in the car in the sun is #1.

As a new parent, I can't imagine how anyone would ever accidentally leave a child in their car.

The typical example given is that someone, in their sleep-deprived haze, forgets to take the sleeping infant to their daycare before going to work.

I go the other extreme, every time I'm in the car by myself I have a few "Oh no! Where's the baby!" moments.

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