Earlier quoted context omitted.
I am not a diehard android, but i'm replying to you from a LineageOS phone without the Gapps, using microg as an alternative to the google services, and firefox as a browser. Privacy is achievable on Android. However, I do agree it os very involved.
The services provided by Gapps that send data to Google (push messaging, aGPS, crash reporting, app installs, safe browsing, etc.) also exist on iOS with exactly the same privacy policies. The only difference is that you can remove or disable them on Android devices if you are paranoid, while no such remedy exists on iPhones. By your standards, privacy is achievable with difficulty on Android and not at all on iOS.
That leaves app installs (Android allows side loading) and push messaging (I'm not sure about this one) as the ones that you can't disable on iOS.