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Ask YC: do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend?

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Re: Ask YC: do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend?

#51
post #23

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I realize every relationship/business is different, but how is that working out - both in the relationship and in the business (if you don't mind sharing)?

Generally, investors are wary of married couples, in that they've been burned before. So we need to be very cognizant of the way we act around each other to ensure they get the most positive impression. If you read accounts of the flickr cofounders, you'll also get anecdotal evidence (that I've never experienced) that some investors are assholes and don't take women seriously. We have complementing skillsets, which i…

  I don't consider my wife a co-founder, but she is definitely a part of my team if nothing more than being in the cheerleading section.  
  She was not as fully committed as myself and she smartly vetoed the mortgaging of our home to get the project done, but once she caught my vision she became as dedicated as me to seeing the project become a success.
 I had her read "Internet Riches" to get her non-techy mind into the mode. It was after she read that book that she became fully committed and supportive.
I guess I can't really classify her anymore as "not_involved", and that's good for both of us.

Re: Ask YC: do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend?

#53
post #36
post #35

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>it's worth the risk of being hurt

What percent do you estimate that risk is?

That's irrelevant. Even if that was 100%, it would be worth the 'risk'. Not ever living romance is sadder than certainty of pain.

Re: Ask YC: do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend?

#56
post #8
post #4

Nope. Life as a computer science major in college and an overall geek leaves very little time.

If you don't even have time as a student, how will it be once you join the workforce?

I will worry about it once I am done with school ;) I see nothing wrong with having a girlfriend but I don't feel alarmed not to have one at the moment.

Re: Ask YC: do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend?

#58
It's depressing to read things like "Nope. Life as a computer science major in college and an overall geek leaves very little time."

I'm sure you play videogames, read/post on non-industry forums or do SOMETHING not work related. Socializing with women will help you find "the right one" in the long run, and will keep you from being taken advantage of once you "make it."

Personally, I broke up with my girlfriend of three years before moving to SF, independent of deciding to start YC. Overall, not having to "keep up" has definitely helped me.

I've been single throughout the nosebleed "grind-and-build-and-demo" three month YC cycle, but I regularly went out in SF and even had some flings that were fun but shallow distractions.

I've recently started dating an amazing woman who's completing her studies while working in Los Angeles; she's at least as busy as I am and we're "dating" in whatever capacity is possible. Although we're both ridiculously busy we respect our space/priorities, and it's fun and affirmative.

To each his/her own I suppose.

Re: Ask YC: do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend?

#59
post #25
post #5

No, romance is dumb.

We know that romantic relationships frequently hurt people. This leaves some pro-romance positions available such as: - it only hurts foolish people; there are known solutions to all those problems - it's worth the risk of being hurt - there is a type of relationship that is different than conventional romance in a way that prevents being hurt, but is still romantic So, anyone want to debate, or just stick to downvot…

It's a relevant and significant question. The west's views on romance are not the norm. For example, the Greeks considered the best relationships to be between men, since men were thought to be the most rational. This is similar in Islamic cultures too.

While I don't have a specific cite I can show you to back up the claims about the Greeks, it is pretty evident if you've read Plato and Aristotle. As for Muslims, this is pretty clear if you just look at how they treat women.

Frankly, I'm disappointed that there is so much knee jerk voting going on here. On the other hand, it is interesting that xLnt has really hit a nerve.

Re: Ask YC: do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend?

#60
post #33

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Debate? I wouldn't mind. I'd say (although maybe I'm unqualified to do so... :) ) that although it may hurt, it can also just lead to a happier lifestyle. And happier people, it seems to me, would be more productive, both in the short and long run. So while relationships may hurt people, the hurt would be short term, while the overall happiness and productivity gains might be long-term. ----- Oh, and by the way. It t…

While people frequently feel happy about romance, what is there that should make one happy? If the answer is something like, "having a close relationship where you understand each other well" then that is possible without romance and without being hurt.

I don't think you are questioning that romance can cause more intense and overwhelming feelings than the social and intellectual pleasure of close bonds and mutual understanding, right?

It's quite easy to explain, in evolutionary terms, why it 'should' be like that. But I don't think this is the "should" that you are asking about. And the problem is, there are no other "should"s, no other "why"s.

In asking for a transcendent "why", you are negating the intrinsic "legitimacy" of our most basic instincts. You emphasize the "feel" in "feel happy" as if there was anything to happiness beyond the feeling of it.

Trying to submit instincts to reason doesn't make any more sense to me than trying to submit axioms to inference rules.

You may argue romance is kinda obsolescent now that culture is overriding genetics as the main driver of adaptation. But by the same radically disembodied reasoning, you shouldn't take romantic pain so seriously.

We just are what we are. Play to win; life is too short for anything else.

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