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Thanks to Venmo, We Now All Know How Cheap Our Friends Are

nytimes.com

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Re: Thanks to Venmo, We Now All Know How Cheap Our Friends Are

#101

Post by ac29 »

lawnchair_larry wrote: post #43
Overtonwindow wrote: post #32

I don't use this app and this article kind of explains why. If I go to dinner with friends, or anything, I'd rather pick up the check than worry about splitting it. The next time, they'll pickup the tab, and so forth. That's what friends do. I don't know if I'd want to go out with someone who is going to bill me for it later, or wants to use an app to split things up. For me it just makes things superficial, awkward,…

Weird. Perfectly normal for any groups I've ever eaten with. Easy to ask the server to split the bill.

>Perfectly normal for any groups I've ever eaten with. Easy to ask the server to split the bill.

Try that with a group of 8-12 people, especially if they all want to be charged different amounts. Some places will do it, but many wont. A lot easier for one person to pay, and others to pay them back with cash (or one of the million free payment apps like Venmo).

Re: Thanks to Venmo, We Now All Know How Cheap Our Friends Are

#102

Post by treehau5 »

dsjoerg wrote: post #68
mjevans wrote: post #58

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You were either too proud to tell your friends the truth or had bad friends.

You haven't had many friendships with diverse income levels.

This problem is even worse when it's not even necessarily income levels that is the problem, but just different values around money & spending. If you have the same income level, but find it outrageous to spend x on y, you just get viewed as a "cheap ass"

It's not my fault I don't want to pay 13 dollars+tip for a cocktail when I can make 20 of them at home for the same price.

Re: Thanks to Venmo, We Now All Know How Cheap Our Friends Are

#103

Post by [deleted] »

snakeboy wrote: post #64
bit48 wrote: post #51

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> How is this portrayed as a bad thing in the article? It takes some of the humanity out of the time spent together. Being generous with each other is part of how friendships and other relations are formed. Among friends, boiling it down to a precise transaction is petty. If a friend is abusing this approach, that says something about both him and your friendship.

What if you just happen to enjoy steak and your friend enjoys chicken? Then in the 50-50 split, you could be seen as "abusing" the system if you two go out to dinner often, yes?

[deleted]

Re: Thanks to Venmo, We Now All Know How Cheap Our Friends Are

#104

Post by code_duck »

Sir_Substance wrote: post #81
extr wrote: post #77

Young millennial male, every single person I know uses Venmo. IMO this article largely misses the point of the app. It's replaced cash/checks is all, it's not some huge social upheaval in the way we use money that needs to be analyzed. In my experience it's rarely used for splitting bills for dinner or picking up bar tabs (I can't remember the last time I went somewhere that wasn't able to split the bill on their end…

>Young millennial male, every single person I know uses Venmo. Young millennial male, I'd never heard of this thing until now. These things tend to be emblematic of poor local banking infrastructure. This reminds me a lot of echocash[1]. [1] https://www.econet.co.zw/ecocash/

I've never heard of it except as an obscure Paypal competitor. And, it turns out it's essentially the same service as Paypal and is even owned by Paypal, since 2014.

I agree that services like this only serve to fill gaps in antiquated banking systems. From what I understand, in Australia, for instance, people can send money easily for free between bank accounts and do so routinely without 3rd party services - including paying at stores. Circa 2009, a friend from Adelaide rolled eyes that we still used paper checks in the US. We still do.

Re: Thanks to Venmo, We Now All Know How Cheap Our Friends Are

#105

Post by mpweiher »

cbhl wrote: post #87
Sir_Substance wrote: post #81

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>Young millennial male, every single person I know uses Venmo. Young millennial male, I'd never heard of this thing until now. These things tend to be emblematic of poor local banking infrastructure. This reminds me a lot of echocash[1]. [1] https://www.econet.co.zw/ecocash/

I believe Venmo is US-only. Determining whether the US has poor local banking infra is left as an exercise to the reader. ;)

It does. (European, lived 8 years in the US in 2 installments of 4 years each).

Re: Thanks to Venmo, We Now All Know How Cheap Our Friends Are

#107

Post by themoat »

endlessvoid94 wrote: post #82

Sorry but this is nonsense. The fact that there is no more rounding is a better default that we no longer must put any thought into. It's more convenient. I fail to see how it harms the relationship in a way that's "petty". This also completely leaves out the inconvenience of planning a large gathering for friends and fronting all the money yourself. Yes, it may feel "petty" to be reminded to pay your share, but imag…

Absolutely. Rounding leads to trying to keep a mental tally of how much do I owe you vs hoe much you owe me. My wife's family is a mess with that because everyone remembers or forgets different amounts. Just let me reimburse you exactly what you paid and we will always be square. How could that be a bad thing?

Re: Thanks to Venmo, We Now All Know How Cheap Our Friends Are

#108

Post by carrendi »

beisner wrote: post #26
canadian_voter wrote: post #9

It is possible to make one’s ledger and contacts private, but many users overlook these options ... I'm sorry, what? The default is to make all of my transactions public? What the absolute living f---.

It's not all transactions, just social ones. People share their personal information on social media all the time, particularly information that relates to a social interaction. Since money is often a component of social interactions, a public record of social transactions essentially adds no information to what people have already voluntarily posted on other social forums. I use Venmo all the time, and since the dol…

A friend once paid me back for a "sensitive interaction" and put a snowflake emoji in the comment. I don't know if it was public. It was tacky and thereafter I only took cash for such transactions.

Re: Thanks to Venmo, We Now All Know How Cheap Our Friends Are

#109

Post by FireBeyond »

cbhl wrote: post #79
extr wrote: post #77

Young millennial male, every single person I know uses Venmo. IMO this article largely misses the point of the app. It's replaced cash/checks is all, it's not some huge social upheaval in the way we use money that needs to be analyzed. In my experience it's rarely used for splitting bills for dinner or picking up bar tabs (I can't remember the last time I went somewhere that wasn't able to split the bill on their end…

For our generation, this pettiness goes the other way, too. I will literally try to buy lunch/coffee/dinner for someone, and after I've gone home, they've sent an unsolicited 'repayment' to me by Venmo. And on the other hand, it's difficult to "split your case of beer" with someone -- people are afraid to partake because they're worried you'll bill them afterwards, and they can't afford the $3 in this month's budget.

Wow, this sounds horrible. The day my friends think I'll bill them for splitting a case of beer is the day I've failed as a friend.

Re: Thanks to Venmo, We Now All Know How Cheap Our Friends Are

#110

Post by [deleted] »

extr wrote: post #77

Young millennial male, every single person I know uses Venmo. IMO this article largely misses the point of the app. It's replaced cash/checks is all, it's not some huge social upheaval in the way we use money that needs to be analyzed. In my experience it's rarely used for splitting bills for dinner or picking up bar tabs (I can't remember the last time I went somewhere that wasn't able to split the bill on their end…

[deleted]
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