Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Ask HN: What ways have worked for you to overcome 'imposter syndrome'?

news.ycombinator.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

111–120 of 159 posts

Re: Ask HN: What ways have worked for you to overcome 'imposter syndrome'?

#111

Post by fencepost »

I look at two things. First, my customers seem to be in general pretty happy with the work I'm doing for them. Second, I read the threads on here about people trying to hire and interview and the problems that they run into or provide to prospective employees that cause problems. Since most of what I'm reading seems either obvious or at least has an obvious starting point and approach I feel like I must be doing something right.

I also freely admit that I don't know everything or even most things, so I don't worry about that. If I need to learn about something I know that that's something I can do.

Re: Ask HN: What ways have worked for you to overcome 'imposter syndrome'?

#112

Post by tuna-piano »

100% radical honesty, with yourself first, and then others.

Prereq- Have significant money saved, so that you'll have breathing room and confidence if it doesn't work out. For me, not being beholden to a given job/client has given me the confidence to just do my best and not fret too much about how I'm perceived.

1. As an hourly consultant, imposter syndrome has been tough. When clients pay large bill rates for an expert in a certain area, they are looking for an expert. Whereas an employer might mentor you and help you learn, that's not what clients do. I'm not sure if I'm an expert or not, but being ~100% honest during the proposal and delivery phase gives myself mental acceptance. I just need to have the skills and experiences that I told them I have (which of course I do have)! If I recognize that those skills and experiences turn out not to be enough, I'll be 100% honest with myself and the client at that point as well.

2. Today, you are as good as you'll be today. Just do your best. If that's not good enough for your coworkers/clients/boss, then the opportunity is probably not right for you either.

3. Always be close to 100% honest with what you know and what you don't know. Most people overstate their skills, but it's usually pretty apparent. Being truthful makes you special.

4. For social, project management, communication decisions, etc I often think "What would a true professional do?" (maybe even substitute with someone amazing you've worked with). If you just do what the best person would do, others perceive you as that type of person.

There will always be smarter people. You probably overestimate how much most people actually know. I still very much feel imposter syndrome, but it hopefully doesn't affect too much in actuality.*

*I actually feel imposter syndrome writing this. WTF do I know about this topic?

Re: Ask HN: What ways have worked for you to overcome 'imposter syndrome'?

#113

Post by davidmckayv »

I actually specifically wrote about this after receiving an email calling imposter syndrome out as the reason the person wanted to stop the interview process. Some thoughts on how to overcome it are in the article.

https://medium.com/@DavidMcKayV/obliterate-imposter-syndrome...

Re: Ask HN: What ways have worked for you to overcome 'imposter syndrome'?

#114

Post by thesnufkin »

Socratic questioning [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Socratic_questioning) helps me still to this day. I've also found that finding confidence in the value that I do by measuring metrics (feedback, output, whatever works) helps as well, but ultimately a lot of discussions with my peers.

[edit] It's important to realise, understand, and then accept that you will never be the one who knows everything the best. But accepting that you can move on, relax, find joy in doing what you do. And funnily in doing that you actually may be again one that knows better.

Re: Ask HN: What ways have worked for you to overcome 'imposter syndrome'?

#115

Post by Jach »

I remind myself where the extrema are, both low and high, for my current situation, not for the collective internet. So long as I'm not close to the lower boundary and improving at least as fast as it's rising, everything is fine. Lots of people don't even bother trying to improve.

Re: Ask HN: What ways have worked for you to overcome 'imposter syndrome'?

#116

Post by stupidstupid1 »

I don't overcome it. I recognize that it is there and pay it no mind.

Maybe I am a fraud, maybe I'm not. I've been at this for almost 25 years now and nobody has outed me; Either I'm not a fraud or I'm very good at being one. In either case, yay me!

Re: Ask HN: What ways have worked for you to overcome 'imposter syndrome'?

#117

Post by toomanyrichies »

sgentle wrote: post #61

I believe impostor syndrome comes from wanting to feel something that it's impossible to feel. When you look at someone successful, you think "wow, that person is amazing, look how great they are!" But do you think they feel that way about themselves? Idolisation is something you can do to someone else, but, unless you have very severe narcissism, not to yourself. So, much the same way you can't write a book that giv…

I've heard this referred to as "comparing your insides to someone else's outsides". As a journeyman software engineer, I still catch myself doing it and have to remind myself that it's unproductive.

Re: Ask HN: What ways have worked for you to overcome 'imposter syndrome'?

#118

Post by [deleted] »

fsagadhadffsh wrote: post #108
rb808 wrote: post #97

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This has the added benefit that when you talk to normal people you will realize you really know a lot about tech compared to everyone else.

Thinking like this and, potentially because people with that mindset can't keep it to themselves, talking like this is the best way to become a loner who is hated by absolutely any sincere or loving person. Yikes.

[deleted]

Re: Ask HN: What ways have worked for you to overcome 'imposter syndrome'?

#119

Post by toomanyrichies »

Mentoring and contributing to open-source are, by far, two of the best techniques I've encountered for overcoming impostor syndrome.

The old saying that "the best way to learn is to teach" has proven true for me time and again. It forces me to verbalize my knowledge, and if I'm unable to do that, it means I don't really understand it as well as I thought and have to return to Google or Stack Overflow until I can verbalize it.

Contributing to open source has been a great way for me to apprentice under those who know more than me. It forces me to read code until I understand it and can make improvements to it. And it forces me to justify the changes I'm making through thoughtful, well-documented pull requests.

Finally, remember that Hacker News will always make you feel like you have a ways to go on your journey. There will always be people out there who know more than you do, just as there will always be people out there who are richer / better-looking / etc. HN attracts lots of technically-minded people, including those who are in the top 0.1% of their field, and the posts those folks make naturally attract a disproportionate share of attention, comments, and upvotes. That creates a survivorship bias, since especially when you consider that most people like you and me (i.e. people who are still earning their stripes) tend to do more lurking than posting.

Post reply on HN