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Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment

nytimes.com

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Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment

#191

Post by vkou »

nickpsecurity wrote: post #104
meowface wrote: post #92

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>Just kind of musing on a concern I've heard from a lot of people in and mostly outside that field just talking about rules where men can never hit on or anything close women who are professionals. Then why do couples often say they met at work? If you're an investor, meeting someone for the first or second time, and someone asks you for money, and you hit on them , you're an utter asshole and moron. Yes, even if som…

"Then why do couples often say they met at work?" That's actually my argument. Many do. Anyone applying nothing personal on the job wouldn't achieve that since each would report on the other per policy of no advances. Yet, there's tons of couples that met on the job. So, clearly a lot of people disagreeing with that concept or seeking to limit it in some way with a lot of relationships that wouldn't have happened. "I…

There is a legal, and ethical difference between meeting and dating a co-worker, and hitting on someone who you have power over.

The former is, assuming everyone is OK with it, fine. The latter is illegal as hell, and even if everyone is OK with it at the time, will expose you to litigation. Don't do it.

This is sexual harassment training 101.

Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment

#192

Post by DonHopkins »

19eightyfour wrote: post #149
CydeWeys wrote: post #13

This is a watershed moment in the VC industry. The dam has finally burst, and we're now seeing the establishment of a new norm in which women who are being harassed go public rather than feeling compelled to hide it. Expect to see many men who were operating under the old norms getting ousted.

Hopefully man on man abuse comes out as well. Sex abuse between all pairings / genders happens but there are not so many women VCs so it's unlikely that's going to come down here. But there are quite a few gay VCs. My advice to everybody is keep meticulous notes and records of your interactions with others, regardless of gender. This is important to expose abuse and to expose lies.

There's always DEN.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmaRTZpJgPA

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Digital_Entertainment_Network

Isn't that guy still running the Bitcoin Foundation?

https://arstechnica.com/business/2014/05/some-in-bitcoin-gro...

He has a history of doing business with other creepy people, too.

http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2016/09/stephen-bannon-w...

https://www.wired.com/2016/09/trumps-campaign-ceos-little-kn...

https://www.wired.com/2008/11/ff-ige/

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10155736654012782&se...

Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment

#194

Post by [deleted] »

passive wrote: post #184
bdamm wrote: post #171

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Maybe this is easier if you've had a sister. I never did. And I can't sit across the table from a skin-flashing admin assistant and think of her like my mom, who is in her 70s. It doesn't work.

The fact that you use the term "skin-flashing" here is a little concerning. Perhaps it was just meant as a shorthand for attractive woman, because otherwise you've taken a woman's choice of dress and behaviour and made them part of your neurosis. Unless of course she is giving you the Basic Instinct treatment (is that too old a reference for this site?), in which case I'm entirely out of advice for you.

[deleted]

Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment

#195

Post by Jach »

rubicon33 wrote: post #38
Apocryphon wrote: post #15

How is it that the old money industries of Wall Street and Hollywood, no vanguards of gender egalitarianism themselves, seem to have less flagrant sexual harassment issues? Do they keep them under wraps or are they just more mature by now?

The tech industry, for all it's faults and transgressions, is still a relatively progressive industry (emphasis on RELATIVE). "Old money industries" have been getting away with this type of behavior for decades, if not centuries. Women in those jobs probably see no point in reporting it or coming forward. Why would they? It's not going to make headlines that the secretary at Goldman Sachs gets propositioned for sex b…

I'm not sure it's that they're more "progressive" but that seems to point in the right direction. My own thought is that tech has relatively more "white knights" and also relatively more people willing to look at their actions affecting the world, even if it's sometimes a distorted view of changing it with a milk startup or whatever. Letting these things slide creates an uglier world to live in, whereas in other industries there's probably acceptance of the way things are or just a sense of being able to switch industries.

Currently I wonder which side will end up dominating tech culture or if we'll remain at war. Some companies have to send out memos telling people to cut out the sex in the stairwells. Others just don't hire any women and try to make sure they're not discriminating in a way that's illegal (not that hard with "pipeline" arguments, at least for core tech positions). And then others have some balance, and make it work or result in drama like this story.

Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment

#196

Post by azinman2 »

19eightyfour wrote: post #149
CydeWeys wrote: post #13

This is a watershed moment in the VC industry. The dam has finally burst, and we're now seeing the establishment of a new norm in which women who are being harassed go public rather than feeling compelled to hide it. Expect to see many men who were operating under the old norms getting ousted.

Hopefully man on man abuse comes out as well. Sex abuse between all pairings / genders happens but there are not so many women VCs so it's unlikely that's going to come down here. But there are quite a few gay VCs. My advice to everybody is keep meticulous notes and records of your interactions with others, regardless of gender. This is important to expose abuse and to expose lies.

Do you know of specific stories? Have you experienced this yourself?

I am a gay man who has raised money, and networked with various gay VCs. I’ve never seen this kind of behavior from them personally.

Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment

#197

Post by jakelazaroff »

tuna-piano wrote: post #129

Wow, this seems terrible. For these women (and from the sounds of it, many more) to always have to second guess if an investor likes them for good business reasons or whether it's just because they're pretty. To always dread meeting a new business contact, knowing there's a small but substantial chance he'll make some awkward comment. Some thoughts: 1. Is this more common in silicon valley than elsewhere? (I've never…

Also want to reply to #4. The thing that differentiates the sexual harassment in most of these cases is that there's a power imbalance. Being hit on becomes much scarier if declining might jeopardize your job or your startup's funding.

Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment

#198

Post by 19eightyfour »

DonHopkins wrote: post #192
19eightyfour wrote: post #149

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Hopefully man on man abuse comes out as well. Sex abuse between all pairings / genders happens but there are not so many women VCs so it's unlikely that's going to come down here. But there are quite a few gay VCs. My advice to everybody is keep meticulous notes and records of your interactions with others, regardless of gender. This is important to expose abuse and to expose lies.

There's always DEN. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmaRTZpJgPA https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Digital_Entertainment_Network Isn't that guy still running the Bitcoin Foundation? https://arstechnica.com/business/2014/05/some-in-bitcoin-gro... He has a history of doing business with other creepy people, too. http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2016/09/stephen-bannon-w... https://www.wired.com/2016/09/trumps-campaign-ceo…

Incredibly creepy.

Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment

#200

Post by DonHopkins »

19eightyfour wrote: post #198
DonHopkins wrote: post #192

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There's always DEN. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmaRTZpJgPA https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Digital_Entertainment_Network Isn't that guy still running the Bitcoin Foundation? https://arstechnica.com/business/2014/05/some-in-bitcoin-gro... He has a history of doing business with other creepy people, too. http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2016/09/stephen-bannon-w... https://www.wired.com/2016/09/trumps-campaign-ceo…

Incredibly creepy.

It's like Pizzagate, but true!
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