Wow, think for a second how hard is to be an entrepreneur. All the shit we have to deal with at so many different levels. These women goes beyond that, literally putting everything on the line. Much respect.
Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment
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Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment
#132Earlier quoted context omitted.
"If you're not doing doing anything wrong you have nothing to fear." Ahh--if only this were ever true.
Again, that statement is only false if these are false accusations. Are you saying they're false accusations?
Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment
#133Earlier quoted context omitted.
> I expect less VCs to take meetings with women, sadly. Why? There's a really simple procedure that can solve these problems: Don't hit on, feel-up, or try to have sex with people you're in a professional business relationship with . That goes double for people you hold power over (managers to employees, VCs to Founders, etc). If you're really truly worried about false accusations then here's another fix you can have…
> "If you're really truly worried about false accusations then here's another fix you can have for free: record your meetings, texts, emails, and calls with founders and/or don't meet alone." Well, there are two problems with that. 1 - It puts the burden of proof on the accused. I.E. it totally throws out of the window what has become a de facto human right and an universally established legal one in every democracy:…
(Law enforcement is exempt from this restriction, of course).
Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment
#134How is it that the old money industries of Wall Street and Hollywood, no vanguards of gender egalitarianism themselves, seem to have less flagrant sexual harassment issues? Do they keep them under wraps or are they just more mature by now?
Once the West Coast tech world starts paying into the scam you won't hear about sexual transgressions there any more than you do in the world of Wall Street or Hollywood which are, as you hint, 1000x worse. People are just now hearing about guys like Bill Cosby, but his behavior was standard issue.
Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment
#135I'm a US, straight (the subject of the OP is men hitting on women, so, for me to give my experience as examples, it's important to note that I'm a straight male), US, native born, white (for my examples, it's likely also relevant to note that I'm in the majority of the people in the subject of the OP), male. From my first girlfriend to my (late) wife, I've always treated girls/women as angels. But in the work place,…
Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment
#136"Because VCs are all populated by serial harassers who now realize they can't get away with this crap?" Because any of them that aren't used to avoiding all the risky behaviors, whether doing it intentionally (asking for dates) or unintentionally ("discriminatory language"), will now worry that they'll be hit with newspaper articles that can destroy their career. They'll be considered guilty until proven innocent by…
These are people with personality disorders (especially Borderline), who can thrive in environments where incessant lying, gaslighting, and life-ruining accusations are rewarded . The current system lets the people with the least morals float to the top, regardless of their gender. I don't know how to deal with borderlines in situations like this, but it's wrong for people to simply pretend they don't exist.
I've noticed people on HN never really want to discuss why people like the Uber CEO are sexist, and how people like that should be handled (aside from just firing them and forgetting that they exist). Learning about personality disorders can help you understand lots of behavior that was previously unexplainable or baffling, and perhaps even teach you something about yourself if you realize that you have one. The more time I spend in tech, the more I think that the rate of occurrence for them is much higher than in the general population.
I really wish greater awareness of personality disorders was espoused in tech, and that Americans in general took mental health more seriously. I think you could begin to fix a lot of problems that get talked about here by simply having people go to therapy. It wouldn't be a quick fix and it's not guaranteed, but it's better than nothing.
Also learning about the drama triangle:
Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment
#137Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment
#138Wow, this seems terrible. For these women (and from the sounds of it, many more) to always have to second guess if an investor likes them for good business reasons or whether it's just because they're pretty. To always dread meeting a new business contact, knowing there's a small but substantial chance he'll make some awkward comment. Some thoughts: 1. Is this more common in silicon valley than elsewhere? (I've never…
Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment
#139I really hope that stories like this will let us stop blaming specific companies like Uber and accept that this is a problem with our industry. We're never going to be able to fix this as long as we keep sticking our heads in the sand and pretending it's not a systemic issue.
Re: Silicon Valley Women, in Cultural Shift, Frankly Describe Sexual Harassment
#140Wow, this seems terrible. For these women (and from the sounds of it, many more) to always have to second guess if an investor likes them for good business reasons or whether it's just because they're pretty. To always dread meeting a new business contact, knowing there's a small but substantial chance he'll make some awkward comment. Some thoughts: 1. Is this more common in silicon valley than elsewhere? (I've never…
If as it turns out the woman had not been interested, in retrospect, would the methods of initiation seem like sexual harassment? I believe it's very likely they might.
Again, there are clearly methods that are right and clearly some that are wrong. But I have a feeling the large grey area can be considered harassment if a woman turns out not to be interested, and adoringly recalled in a heart-warming wedding toast if they end up getting married.