It's impossible to be absolutely "inclusive". Situations like this make the cognitive dissonance obvious.
1. There is no standard of what ethical behavior entails. Many thoughts are actually incompatible. In this context:
1a. Some people might think it's unethical or immoral to be violent even in a consensual sexual context. This could include certain religious people, but it could include certain kinds of pacifists and feminists as well.
1b. Some people might think it's unethical or immoral to have anything beyond a "don't ask, don't tell" policy. In this view, if you know about it and they didn't tell you personally, it's messed up.
1c. Some people might think it's unethical or immoral to be anything less than 100% supportive of any kind of sexual expression.
1d. Some people really don't care and are offended that their desire to be left out of all this isn't respected.
...there are certainly more positions and combinations of positions here.
2. There is the secondary question as to what means in the pursuit of (1) are ethical or moral.
2a. What information is public?
2b. Once something is leaked, can we use it? How do we pretend we hadn't learned something?
2c. What opinions are worth respecting? Understanding? Should we silence people with unconscionable opinions?
2d. Can we outright exclude people for having non-inclusive beliefs?