101–110 of 341 posts
Great sci-fi, but also cast science and technology in a way that made me realize it could enable or destroy civilization.
Introduced me to the concept that we can approach modeling and predicting human behavior with mathematics.
Very instrumental in pushing me towards hard sciences and computer modeling.
I have re-read this book constantly since purchasing it well over 10 years ago. The chapters on facing resistance and how to deal with it constantly resonate with me when working on my own projects.
The Bible.
Because when I was young and I tried reading it I realized that even though millions and millions of perfectly functioning adults believe in something, it might be absolutely wrong or based on basically nothing.
The Inner Game of Tennis. My tennis coach gave me his copy, from the mid 80s, which was tattered and had clearly been read many, many times. It taught me so much about life, and how to be successful. My tennis coach was also my life coach when I reflect back on those days. He grew up in south central LA, rode his bike to the closest tennis courts and sometimes as far as Beverly Hills. He'd wait outside the courts unt…
I'm surprised it isn't mentioned more in "must-read" lists.
I found a yellow-paged first edition on my parents' shelves as a young kid, and was heavily shaped by the idea of a character (and society) that trained themselves to think clearly.
This included years of training on how to channel (and ground) one's emotions, and a constant and deep understanding of "the map is not the territory". Or, in other words, our mental models are just that, and should be discarded or updated as soon as reality differs from them.
This allowed the character to respond with almost superhuman speed when confronted with otherwise traumatic emotional revelations, and the society as a whole to reorganize in response to an incipient alien invasion.
I've been trying to train myself to think like that ever since, and it has probably contributed to the large gap I felt between the thinking of my peers and me as I grew up.
I'm not sure how well the book holds up now, without my nostalgia colored glasses, but I still reread it every few years to remind me of the direction of my thoughts.
Man's Search For Meaning by Viktor Frankl The book was written by a psychologist who survived the Holocaust camps. The paragraph that always sticks with me goes something like "for sure, the best amongst us never left the camps - they (the guards) would need to pick (kill) a dozen people, and the best wouldn't let it be their friends or family, even if it meant their own death."
It's supposedly fantasy, but it contains some of the best (fun and insightful) examinations of political systems, economics, religion, the environment, military culture and more. If it sounds like everything, it's because it is :)
My favorite work of art in any medium.
PS. It's a series (and a long one at that).
I was emotionally disconnected from people and myself from ~10~33 years old via information addiction (compulsively doing everything up to the "doing" parts of creation).
My disconnect kept me from learning how to communicate my empathy to others, as well as kept me from fully considering/respecting their needs. Around a year ago, I broke through denial over sexual trauma I experienced as a child and was able to largely come to peace with it in 12 hours thanks to the principles and practices of NVC. That was huge and only the start of the book's impact on me.
Essentially, this book has been teaching me how to human for the past year. I've read it 5 times and may read it again this week. I'm willing to send a used copy from Amazon to anyone who can't afford a copy and thinks they could benefit from it. My contact info is in my profile for those who wish to take me up on the offer. Here are more ways the book has changed my life.
- It taught me how to emphatically connect. The communication framework it teaches is simple, yet highly structured. It was perfect for my systematic way of thinking.
- I gained a new understanding of fundamental human needs and how they relate to emotions we experience.
- I began practicing it with a friend, who I fell in love with through our mutual ability to connect and was briefly engaged to them last year.
-I've introduced the book to my family and the entire dynamic has changed dramatically. Passive aggressive and/or codependent behaviors are slowly starting to shift.
- The book inspired me to practice abandoning my judgments. All of them. After a few weeks of this, I realized I was enjoying foods I used to hate. And then I started enjoying music I used to hate. And then children became adorable instead of obnoxious.
- I've always known something was wrong with the US justice system, but had no idea how to fix it. I learned about restorative justice through the book and my entire worldview has shifted as a result. I'm now slowly developing ideas for how to shift systems in that direction.
- I developed a model for how humans work I use to program my brain in very intentional ways. NVC principles serve as optimization techniques in it.
- An example of one such optimization was so profound it's worth noting by itself. I realized I can view every moment as meeting some needs of mine. The shittiest of moments can specifically meet a combination of 4 needs: learning to better meet my needs, learning to better empathize with others, gratitude for both of those things, and gratitude for the opportunity to learn. I began processing the world this way on New Year's Eve and it's changed practically everything I do. My reality is not at all what it once was and I love it.
- I have a concern about creating a programming language for human brains and giving it to the world. Specifically, I'm worried about people using it to exploit others. If I don't abandon my worry, I'll first encode NVC practices in it and release it as a sort of mental antivirus.
- In preparing to test an hypothesis my model generated about gender identity, I accidentally spawned a seemingly conscious second voice in my head. NVC is incredibly helpful when it comes to us communicating with each other.