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Reverse Culture Shock

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Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#181

A German-born American with 11 years total living in Germany. Almost all of it with the iron curtain in place. A white guy, I now live in a neighborhood that's 3/4 black, 10% Hmong for 16 years, I feel very normal being permanently out-of-place. In Germany I am the "Amerikanischer". Here it's "he's German". But I'm permanently alone in a crowd, too. Always on the outside looking in. Suspicious of the herd. Skeptical…

Though it's a lonely frame of mind you describe, it's likely not rare , given modern globalization by the numbers. Even if most reform into cliques derivative of both parent cultures, some small percentage of singletons is still a fair number of people. I can from experience say it's one that some children of immigrant parents (or parents that moved a lot, and/or both) identify as, when they don't identify with their…

Narcissism aside, the feeling is more akin to the part of Herman Hesse's novel Siddhartha where he finds himself walking alone through a pass in the Himalayas at night. Realizing for the first time he's completely alone, a tiny, tiny fleck in the maelstrom of the cosmos, his ego is obliterated. But he's also completely free.

Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#182
post #69

Heck, I grew up in the Bay Area, and I get reverse culture shock when return to visit for more than a few days. So. Much. Traffic. People packed into trains. Everyone so...not exactly rude, but not nearly as friendly as I've grown accustomed (I live near Boulder, Colorado). I feel like my blood pressure is higher the entire time I'm there. Of course the air pressure is higher, so that may have something to do with it…

I always hated driving in SF. I can deal with traffic. I can deal with the pedestrians and cyclists. I can deal with the slew of drivers who thought signaling was optional. I can deal with paying for parking. But holy shit the lack of paid off-street parking lots in numerous parts of the city bugged me, alongside the absurdly inexpensive on-street parking. I never understood why the city didn't raise the price of on-…

I grew up in the Bay Area. I've had to look for parking in the City a few times, but eventually learned to avoid it like the plague. I worked in San Francisco for almost six years and never drove to work even once.

Public transit is the only sane answer. That's why I mentioned trains. When I'm in the Bay Area, if I'm going to San Francisco, I simply refuse to drive there at all.

Hotels have gotten insanely expensive in the City proper as well; when I go to events in San Francisco, if I'm paying for lodging, I'll often get an AirBNB in Oakland near Bart and take that in. Instead of $300/night, I get a nicer place for less than $100/night, and the BART ride is only about 20 minutes.

Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#183

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Plenty of folks in the LGBT community have this feeling as well - rejection or a feeling of not belonging from where one comes from touches most of my friends there. There's communities, cities and cultures that people attach to, and many people trying to find what home means.

This is why the furry community is majority LGBT+. I went to my first furry convention last year, and it was like coming home. Furry Twitter is close, but doesn't quite match it. I'm going to my first Pride later this year, so I'll have something demographically similar to compare with.

Next year would be my 14th year - it's been home to me since I found it, and there's really nothing quite like it.

Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#184

Earlier quoted context omitted.

When I came back from my first tour to Iraq in 2004 (was 19 at the time) it took me almost a full year to feel mostly "home" again. But it definitely changed something about me, ever since that year I've never felt 100% "home" for some reason.

You're 32 now, right? Have you had some kids and a wife and stuff? Elders in my life seem to imply that the feeling of home will come back when you make it come back. A big part of losing "home" is aging out of it.

31, but 32 in a few months, yeah. I'm single and unaffiliated at the moment, but hoping to be married in the next couple of years. Feels like the time is right to start that stage of life.

Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#187

Earlier quoted context omitted.

America is way behind a lot of countries in every point you mentioned

America is way ahead of almost all of Europe in terms of access to transgender healthcare. In most of Europe, it's not uncommon for trans women to be forced to crossdress in public in order to get hormones. It's not uncommon for trans women to be denied hormones for a number of stupid things: if you're attracted to women (you have to be 100% straight to get hormones in most of Europe), because the outfit they wore to…

But at what price are you paying for these things in the US? A quick google search says in the thousands.

With free health care here I would imagine when you do get prescribed, the price is next to nothing. Even though you are jumping through more hoops here, in my opinion it's better to make it affordable than the insane prices the US has and easier.

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