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Reverse Culture Shock

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Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#101

Post by point78 »

astrodust wrote: post #71
wtbob wrote: post #47

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> One of the hardest things for me to adapt to is how "liberal" America has become. It's not an objectively bad thing One wonders, if the rest of the world is more cautious about this sort of thing, if maybe it's America that's in the wrong. Maybe other cultures deal with these things more sensitively or more rationally or just better . My experience travelling abroad is that people seem more comfortable in their ski…

> My experience travelling abroad... Try doing that with a disability, being a visible minority, being a woman, etc. America is far from perfect, but it's at least accommodating . In other countries they don't hesitate to throw people to the curb. It's the little things: The wheelchair accessible stores and streets, the effort made to deal with vision impairments, institutions that are fighting for women's rights and…

America is way behind a lot of countries in every point you mentioned

Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#102

Post by 205guy »

> Your commute to work might be more time consuming. > You may need to spend more time in the car for > shopping, picking up kids at school or playdates, > or running errands. These are not necessarily bad > things; you simply have to adjust to a new routine.

Sad they had to call out these specifically. When I moved back to the US and landed in San Jose (South Bay Area), I thought I was smart and would live "downtown." I only lasted 3 years before meeting a European woman and moving to a very culturally different part of the US.

Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#103

Post by matt4077 »

nickbauman wrote: post #44

A German-born American with 11 years total living in Germany. Almost all of it with the iron curtain in place. A white guy, I now live in a neighborhood that's 3/4 black, 10% Hmong for 16 years, I feel very normal being permanently out-of-place. In Germany I am the "Amerikanischer". Here it's "he's German". But I'm permanently alone in a crowd, too. Always on the outside looking in. Suspicious of the herd. Skeptical…

I've met a few people who moved across continents in their youth, sometimes multiple times. Almost without a fault, they are somewhat obsessed with the concept of 'home'.

My longest time abroad was a year in Chicago, and the place where I grew up is far too boring to ever be considered 'home', so I really have no idea where 'home' would be for me. But I'm largely just indifferent to the idea.

FWIW: I have many American friends living here in Berlin, and none of them are really struggling with their identity. But it may be different if you never had the experience of being part of the 'native' population... It's probably a similar fate to what members of other minorities (religion/race/disability) experience.

Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#104

Post by ribfeast »

kawsper wrote: post #23

I lived 3 years in the UK, and now I am back in Denmark for a while, I hope to return, but lets see what Theresa May & co figures out. I always thought I wanted to go for the dual-citizenship, but not anymore. It is difficult to live in a new place, you don't really feel integrated even though you have friends, speak the language, go to events, pay your taxes, and get the jokes, you will always be the dane and a fore…

American who lived a year in Copenhagen. Just wanted to say that the Danes were aloof, but that I left with an extremely good impression of them. Kind, warm when you know them, reasonable and the kind of humble only janteloven can produce. It taught me a lot to live there-- maybe the most out of all the other ~11 countries I've lived in over the past 15 years.

Fantastic country and people, just too darn flat.

Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#105

Post by ekianjo »

kawsper wrote: post #67
inv wrote: post #50

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have the same, living in the UK for the last 3 years. Any ideas how to feel home back in Denmark? Do you mind you don't feel 100% home in any of the places?

You take the best of both worlds, so no I don't mind it as much anymore. But it makes you think of the all the shenanigans of borders, citizenships and all the time we use on discussing who belongs where, and why.

> all the shenanigans of borders, citizenships

Yup, same thing here. Once you start living in many places, you realize how deeply artificial all these concepts are.

Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#106

Post by ianai »

e40 wrote: post #55
nickbauman wrote: post #44

A German-born American with 11 years total living in Germany. Almost all of it with the iron curtain in place. A white guy, I now live in a neighborhood that's 3/4 black, 10% Hmong for 16 years, I feel very normal being permanently out-of-place. In Germany I am the "Amerikanischer". Here it's "he's German". But I'm permanently alone in a crowd, too. Always on the outside looking in. Suspicious of the herd. Skeptical…

Hi. I feel the same way. When I was a kid, once a week my family would drive to the other side of town (the 99.99% black side) to visit my grandparents and uncle (they were the .01% white folk). I would spend all day Sunday hanging out in this area of town full of dirt poor people (just like my family there). I've never felt at ease and at home as I felt there. The people were friendlier than I could imagine. There w…

Were you ever 'eyed down'? I got that recently at my childhood home.

Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#107

Post by mixmastamyk »

rhizome wrote: post #6
bandrami wrote: post #3

Yup. I'm a "trailing spouse" for an American diplomat, and this is so true. One thing that always, always, always happens to Americans when we repatriate is the "grocery store freakout". At some point, you will go to a grocery store, and freeze. "Man..." you'll keep saying, "Americans really love breakfast cereal..."

"Man..." you'll keep saying, "Americans really love breakfast cereal..." Though it's true to some degree, I wouldn't go that far. My sense is that the higher the margin on a product or product-line, the more money the manufacturer and distributors have to purchase shelf space. Cereal, Chips, Crackers, Ice Cream, Mayonnaise. The last time I was at the store I counted 21 separate varieties of Triscuit, 10-12 flavors ov…

Cereal has been pushed for decades by big corporations. It is cheap, easy to make in the morning, and keeps well. It is also unhealthy, but after such a long time of demonizing fat it still has a big following. For some reason it has somewhat dodged the bullet that soda took.

Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#108

Post by herbst »

nickbauman wrote: post #44

A German-born American with 11 years total living in Germany. Almost all of it with the iron curtain in place. A white guy, I now live in a neighborhood that's 3/4 black, 10% Hmong for 16 years, I feel very normal being permanently out-of-place. In Germany I am the "Amerikanischer". Here it's "he's German". But I'm permanently alone in a crowd, too. Always on the outside looking in. Suspicious of the herd. Skeptical…

I know what you mean. I don't really belong anywhere anymore. I even wrote a short rant about that recently (http://b1nary.ch/2017/03/12/nationality-austria-but/)

I too think I get better insights sometimes and it let me learn how wrong this kind of border thinking actually is.

Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#109

Post by mixmastamyk »

greggman wrote: post #39
verisimilidude wrote: post #24

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I can sympathize. Whenever I come back to the US from Japan, I find myself bowing at the supermarket and persisting lots of little Japanese mannerisms. Sometimes for days. Japanese culture seems to demand more...commitment...than some of the other places I've visited and lived. Perhaps Japan is a stronger source of reverse culture shock.

Bowing st the supermarket ? I've been in Toyko for over 10 years I've never seen customer bow at a supermarket. Is that a thing in some other part of Japan? What I notice going back to the USA is how it often feels like the 3rd world countries my dad would tell me about as a kid indirectly trying to tell me how great the USA is. Now I just see crime, corrupt police, etc. Came back for 6 months got my car broken into…

Venice beach closes, but there are quite a few places open late in Santa Monica, like Swingers. Unfortunately the Tommy's on Pico was turned into a Starbucks :(.

Re: Reverse Culture Shock

#110

Post by herbst »

mahyarm wrote: post #85
astrodust wrote: post #71

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> My experience travelling abroad... Try doing that with a disability, being a visible minority, being a woman, etc. America is far from perfect, but it's at least accommodating . In other countries they don't hesitate to throw people to the curb. It's the little things: The wheelchair accessible stores and streets, the effort made to deal with vision impairments, institutions that are fighting for women's rights and…

America should not be comparing itself to developing nations, but other developed nations. In that they fall short in many things.

From a outside perspective America seems like a developing nation in many perspectives. So I think both should be done.

The amount of homeless, jobless, bad education, a meme president and all that is nothing you find in 'your usual developed nation'

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