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What no one talks about when running and selling a business

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Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#161

Sounds like the author has personal problems they're mistakenly ascribing to their work. Many of their assertions are simply not true (It's possible to be confident without "being an asshole"; I know several such people), and it just comes across as written by an unreliable narrator (if I cared about this person's issues, I'd likely be asking the people who shunned him about what happened and see if the stories match…

I'm surprised I had to scroll more than halfway through the discussion to find this comment. I got the exact same impression reading the post.

That said, it does look like the author possesses some level of self-awareness and is working on his issues.

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#162

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>It's impossible to 'look at someone like a little girl'. It's mostly likely that these people either feel insecure, or, they project certain qualities upon the author. What kind of person ends up surrounded by insecure feeling people like this?

Most people are at least subtly intimidated by those of very apparently higher economic or social standing. ... and people commonly make assumptions about what that person might be like, how they might think about things - assumptions which get projected onto a person which may in fact have no relevance at all. It's very common that people with a great deal of wealth have trouble getting along with those that don't.…

Well, sure, but he's describing people who have known him a long time.

>Yesterday, I got told by someone I really care about

>The day before that, one of my very closest friends and someone who I love like family told me

If these people are as close to the author as he claims, then this assumption-projection thing I don't think would hold up. They don't need to backfill with assumptions about "what would a rich guy think" because they should know the author well enough not to have those kinds of gaps.

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#164

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Bless you. Seriously. It's truly refreshing to hear such genuine humility and perspective. Too many people (on HN, in politics, and in everyday life) work hard, hit it big, then draw a 100% correlation between the two. The reality is that lots of people are working hard, and only a tiny percentage get rich from it. Luck -- birth, education, time, place -- is too often underestimated in the rush to claim personal cred…

humility ? What is this 'humility' you speak of? There is a war on humility for like 20 years now. Things that people unashamedly say today would label them total lunatics 2 decades ago.

I think that's because perceptions about what makes success have slowly shifted from the long path of toil to the superawesome promotion game.

It's like the political cartoon I saw from a few months ago. The Jeopardy-style host said, “I’m sorry, Jeannie, your answer was correct, but Kevin shouted his incorrect answer over yours, so he gets the points.” http://www.newyorker.com/cartoons/a20602

Given the state of funding and never-profitable unicorns, it teaches new entrepreneurs that the way to success is through promotion and emotion.

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#165
> And I continually hurt those around me — just by being myself-and it’s beyond heartbreaking.

If you're an asshole without money, you're going to be an asshole when you have money, too. Money doesn't change you; it reveals you.

This is an interesting read, but the author spends way too much time defending his POV. He expects the people around him to just intuitively know what his skills are, but that isn't realistic. People can't know what you consider yourself to be good at unless you tell them.

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#166

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Founders don't start companies to live a "pretty good life in the top 10%". We do it because we are ambitious, want to solve huge technical and business problems, make our mark, and change the world. We usually have more energy and sleep less than others. We love work. We love our business. Most of us would not want to be corporate "drones". It would be like a living death.

i mainly want to make money. if i can also improve the world, all the better.

I applaud your honesty.

From the entrepreneurs I've talked to, it's usually a combination of money and ego. They want to change the world because then "people will know who I am".

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#167
I find the author's notion of being a leader to be a bit disturbing. A leader is someone whose authority is granted to them by those they are leading. A great leader is someone who may not even be thought of as a leader, but nevertheless directs and coordinates the actions and willing to take the flak for the team.

The idea of a leader taking control of a 4 member band without consent is laughable. That is a dictator, not a leader.

It strikes me as interesting that I do not see this called out more in the comments.

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#168
post #43

I'm not sure I love the article, but I agree with the author's sentiment. I'm 4 years in to a successful bootstrapped startup, and I've lost many close acquaintances. I simply don't have time to keep the social connections alive and I have not prioritized them. I'm somewhat introverted by nature so this is not really a major concern of mine at this time, but I suspect it may be a regret later. What is challenging for…

The "lucked into" thing resonates with me. I've done pretty well and have had a zillion people tell me I got lucky. I used to really resent that. I bootstrapped my company, I took no salary for the first 2-3 years, instead I was out consulting to bring in money so I could pay the people who worked for me. That didn't seem like luck to me. I built technology that most of you use daily, before I came along people thoug…

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Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#170
"... but I’m not cut out to be a stay at home parent"

As with leadership skills, I think that enjoying to be a stay at home parent also must be learnt. It might seem hard, or boring, or tedious to some. But I am convinced basically anyone can make an enjoyable experience of it if they actually make an effort. It will not come automatically, it will take some time and effort.

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