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40% of foreign students in the US have no close American friends on campus

qz.com

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Re: 40% of foreign students in the US have no close American friends on campus

#51

Post by dbg31415 »

When I was in college, circa 20 years ago, I studied Korean. (I had a friend growing up who was Korean, and he taught me swear words and such, and I figured if I ever got the chance to study I would.)

Anyway, I was 6 months into a language course that was heavily populated by US-born Korean students who were taking it for the easy A... I needed a tutor to keep up so I reached out to the teacher who introduced me to a few Korean exchange students.

They lived in their own apartment, not the dorms. They cooked their own food, didn't go to the cafeterias. Fast forward a bit, my fraternity had a charity event and I invited a few of them... was a casual invite, said something like, "Hey we're doing this thing, tell your friends!"

A week later at the charity concert like 60 Korean exchange students showed up. Every single one of them was dressed in a tux or evening gown. Totally classed up the place. Had no idea there were that many exchange students until that night.

And they were all really appreciative of the invite. Basically said no one had invited them to any events on campus before... I met some new folks, knew just enough Korean at that point to ingratiate myself and get invited out drinking after the event... and quickly realized I was playing checkers at a chess tournament when it came to drinking with Koreans. Ha.

Made some friends out of the deal, but it wouldn't have happened without everyone going outside of their comfort zone a bit.

Re: 40% of foreign students in the US have no close American friends on campus

#52

Post by [deleted] »

beeftime wrote: post #31

Before I got into software development I worked for a South Korean company that helped high-level students get into American and Canadian universities. The single biggest source of stress for myself and the other westerners working there is that the administration's (and the parents'!) only goal was to get these kids into a school, and absolutely no thought was given to acclimating them to a different culture or teac…

[deleted]

Re: 40% of foreign students in the US have no close American friends on campus

#53

Post by cpburns2009 »

sqrt wrote: post #40
anonyguy1969 wrote: post #36

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The political correctness statement is so spot on. I still struggle with that till now. People just don't want to talk about certain issues here it seems; a stark contrast to europeans

They didn't mention political correctness, though...?

Political correctness was mentioned in the article:

> Typical campus discourse is often a minefield for newcomers, said a Norwegian student. “I find that Americans are generally very politically correct, and as a European, I think I’m used to being blunter and saying things right out. ..."

Re: 40% of foreign students in the US have no close American friends on campus

#54

Post by [deleted] »

muninn_ wrote: post #29
ch4s3 wrote: post #21

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Of course I read it, I literally used the term "adjustment fatigue" from the end of the article. Yeah, the article is pretty thin, but it's an interesting topic that can promote an interesting conversation. If you don't like it, flag it and upvote something else or submit a better article.

I'm sorry, but none of your suggestions here are good solutions to this article problem. Speaking up and calling the article out, which is what I'm doing, is preferable. ""Please don't submit comments complaining that a submission is inappropriate for the site. If you think a story is spam or off-topic, flag it by clicking on its 'flag' link. If you think a comment is egregious, click on its timestamp to go to its pa…

[deleted]

Re: 40% of foreign students in the US have no close American friends on campus

#55

Post by e40 »

I went to UC Berkeley in the 80's and I found it a sterile and unfriendly environment. Maybe it was me. I had one friend from all the classes I took. One. I had a lot friends from working in the CS department.

I think the reason was the hyper-competitiveness between students. It doesn't foster any sort of cooperation.

Re: 40% of foreign students in the US have no close American friends on campus

#57

Post by muninn_ »

paradite wrote: post #47
muninn_ wrote: post #17

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sure, so how about a good article about it instead of this QZ garbage? Did you even read the article? Chinese student is used to always having one answer but in America there are ambiguous answers. Saudi student has to be around women and work with women. But it's different in Saudi Arabia Really? Oh wait I forgot I have to have a absolutely mind-blowing statistic. Like you won't even believe this statistic. Click he…

> Did you even read the article? You literally broke the HN guidelines here. I agree that the headline is misleading, but nonetheless it promotes interesting discussions that can bring more value than the article itself.

no I did not. The headline isn't misleading, the content of the article is extremely poor.

Re: 40% of foreign students in the US have no close American friends on campus

#58

Post by monksy »

pm90 wrote: post #7

As a former international student, the first year was incredibly lonely as I used to be a deep introvert. The article mentions some of the obstacles but perhaps one of biggest ones is being able to communicate well with Americans. I used to be incredibly anxious about buying groceries simply because I talked very fast English with a heavy accent. I could talk but not communicate ; which means that I could convey fact…

> Perhaps most Americans don't realize just how much of a shared culture is needed for immigrants to understand before they can communicate effectively.

I would also like to add to that: The fact that we have a culture. (That's often underplayed to seem "fair" to other cultures)

Re: 40% of foreign students in the US have no close American friends on campus

#59

Post by jimmies »

jccalhoun wrote: post #28

I teach at a midwest college and I worry about my international students. Some of them do great but too many of them struggle and I don't have the skills or even the time to help them. I try to make sure that they get mixed into groups with the students from the USA in the hopes of encouraging the creation of friendships but I often feel like the university is just taking their international tuition and not doing eno…

As a foreign student, thank you. Among close American friends, some of them were acquired through my class projects. Although it might not be the most effective channel, it definitely makes a difference.

I think the best the school could do is to make the students stay in dorms with shared rooms when they come to study. Roommates, in my anecdotal experience, are among the best channels to acquire friends. If the school doesn't have the policy in the first place, then perhaps there is little that anyone could do to help, if the students don't make it a priority.

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