The idea of unwinding while playing a video game is interesting to me. While I can easily say that I can unwind while playing a video game, I've found that despite my passion for them, when I'm at my most (mentally?) tired they tend to be pretty far down on my list for unwinding. What I've come to realize is that, in general, the games that I personally play are not generally in what I might consider an "unwind" category. I find that it takes actual mental effort to not only start my favorite games, but it takes effort to play them, causing the initial friction in starting them. And since this is all anecdotal based on my own personal experience, I'll add in some examples and explanation for my personal realization:
* Skullgirls: A fighting game I legitimately want to get good at, so time spent playing it is time spent practicing what I'm bad at or just getting certain combos more consistent. Though to be fair, fighting games in general are not put into a category of games to relax with, it's just one of my top played games right now.
* Stardew Valley: I want to play more of this, but there is a LOT going on in this game. Each day the player has to figure out what they're going to focus on for small goals, work toward larger goals, pick from a bunch of different potential activities, etc. And everything done is always time limited both in actual in-game time and stamina, so there's always some kind of pressure to be perfectly efficient. (and I think I've been spoiled in that something happens after a few years in-game, so there's even MORE pressure, gah!)
* The Witness: I really want to finish this game, but it's not something to play casually. The puzzles can get brutally difficult, requiring me to keep relatively extensive notes on some of them, and there are a ton of puzzle types to learn without someone telling you how they work, requiring "debugging" of the rules. Generally with highly complicated rules that might require learning a new subtlety to the rules long after the training area. On top of that, there's the "hidden" content that I need to keep my eye out for.
* Demon's Souls/Dark Souls/Bloodborne: I don't think I need to explain why these require effort to play. They're hard, require memorization, muscle memory, and gitting gud, with failure requiring you to re-do what can be relatively large levels over and over and over again. But when you beat a boss: that dopamine hit is nuts.
* Monster Hunter: Similar category to the Souls games, except there generally aren't large levels, you just have to re-do all the damage you originally did to a monster. Potentially needing to gather more materials for the hunt. Which can take a while. And boy howdy do those monsters NOT want you to hit them in the face with a giant sword.
* ...and there are other games that are just not coming to mind right now, but hopefully some kind of point was made.
With the amount of decision making, pressures on the player to perform, things to learn, etc. in games these days, it honestly feels more relaxing most times to do dishes, edit photographs, write, watch some Netflix with my wife, or whatever else there is to do on any given day. Most times I don't play games unless I'm feeling good enough with enough mental stamina to enjoy the challenges posed, or I'm forcing myself to get better at Skullgirls so I don't get crushed in an upcoming tournament.
So yeah, games as a leisure activity is an interesting concept to me ;) I also recommend not taking what I wrote as some kind of negative. I love games! I love playing them, I love talking about them and analyzing them, and someday I'm hoping I can love making them full time like you instead of occasionally working on a side project in my spare time. I just believe they offer more cognitive load in general than seems to get addressed.