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To fixate on finding work that makes us happy is a luxury

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Re: To fixate on finding work that makes us happy is a luxury

#53
post #47

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>, he promotes that self-diagnosis without defining burden, Personally, I don't need the author to define "burden" for me to understand his point. Part of being an adult is to judge the financial relationship with your parents as being fair. This includes overriding your parents saying to you, "Oh don't mind us, we don't need that $5000 for a European vacation or retirement funds. We want you to use it to produce you…

> but it doesn't really matter right? Yes, it absolutely does matter. The difference isn't that I'm defining the meaning of burden differently than you. It's that I'm choosing to not broadly define it at all (because I know that every dynamic is different), and that the author (and you) are choosing to define it. The author's entire point completely relies on a universal definition of burden because he's also making…

>falls apart once it's understood that the definition of burden is inherently non-universal.

If you have a personal non-universal idiosyncratic definition of "burden", please share it.

I assume its something compatible with ",gladly paid for some things that allowed his son to pursue his passions,"

(I don't think it would change the plug-and-play nature of the author's essay but I'm willing to be shown that _your_ definition completely throws the author's words into a mess of contradictions.)

Re: To fixate on finding work that makes us happy is a luxury

#54
I've got a job I really enjoy now and make a decent salary. However it's my time outside of work that I'm more concerned with. Out side of one key hobby I don't really know what to do with my time so it doesnt feel wasted. I've never had an issue putting in my 8+ hours day if I have something to look forward to when I get home.

Re: To fixate on finding work that makes us happy is a luxury

#56
post #53

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> but it doesn't really matter right? Yes, it absolutely does matter. The difference isn't that I'm defining the meaning of burden differently than you. It's that I'm choosing to not broadly define it at all (because I know that every dynamic is different), and that the author (and you) are choosing to define it. The author's entire point completely relies on a universal definition of burden because he's also making…

>falls apart once it's understood that the definition of burden is inherently non-universal. If you have a personal non-universal idiosyncratic definition of "burden", please share it. I assume its something compatible with ",gladly paid for some things that allowed his son to pursue his passions," (I don't think it would change the plug-and-play nature of the author's essay but I'm willing to be shown that _your_ de…

Okay... As a preface, when I say defining burden I'm using it in the context of this article and the question it poses.

> Are you a burden to those around you?

Where burden is being used as an attribute, i.e. to be a burden. This requires knowing what a burden is, which you actually stated yourself as being different from person to person.

> your own idea of what is a burden which may be different from many other readers

My logical reasoning, like I said, doesn't rely on some "personal non-universal idiosyncratic" definition of burden, it relies on the statement you said yourself, that what a burden is is contextual.

But, the author needs a universal definition (which is why I said that burden isn't a very good word), and part of that definition is a universal judgement on the absolute moral correctness of being a burden.

Am I a burden on those around me? Yes? Well maybe that's okay, because being a "burden" doesn't have to be inherently bad.

That Chinese Crested Hairless is a "burden" by some definition, but that's okay.

A newborn certainly could be a "burden", but that's okay.

Someone's parents are paying for him or her to go to college and graduate debt free, that certainly could be a "burden", but it's also okay. He or she probably shouldn't drop out of school and get a job, so he or she can stop being a "burden".

Re: To fixate on finding work that makes us happy is a luxury

#57
Oh come on: there's a hierarchy of needs and if one level is satisfied it opens up options at another.

Or to put it another way: suffering is not itself a virtue, but the willingness to suffer when needed certainly is. And if suffering is unnecessary, failing to do so is hardly wrong!

My grandfather had a third grade education and worked quite hard; outside work he enjoyed his life. He and my grandmother insisted that all the kids get educations and were gratified that their kids could choose and enjoy a different kind of fulfilment.

Baby boomers were spoiled by parents who found themselves in a prosperous society after themselves having grown up in depression and war: they didn't want their kids to have to live such a life. The results were mixed (I'm younger than the boomers) but I still feel that was a great choice.

If you find yourself in a circumstance where that isn't possible then you need to just put your shoulder to whatever grindstone you can.

Re: To fixate on finding work that makes us happy is a luxury

#58
I make around 70ke/pa in Europe doing a very shitty IT job. It consists of configuring some shitty internal apps and debugging them. No transferrable skills, absolutely zero chance of touching something new or improve myself in any area. Previously I used to work on interesting stuff and a devops department for bigger or smaller companies using aws,docker and friends, golang and some other "breath taking" technologies. I earned about 35k E/pa. What do I do ?

Re: To fixate on finding work that makes us happy is a luxury

#59
post #53

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>falls apart once it's understood that the definition of burden is inherently non-universal. If you have a personal non-universal idiosyncratic definition of "burden", please share it. I assume its something compatible with ",gladly paid for some things that allowed his son to pursue his passions," (I don't think it would change the plug-and-play nature of the author's essay but I'm willing to be shown that _your_ de…

Okay... As a preface, when I say defining burden I'm using it in the context of this article and the question it poses. > Are you a burden to those around you? Where burden is being used as an attribute, i.e. to be a burden . This requires knowing what a burden is, which you actually stated yourself as being different from person to person. > your own idea of what is a burden which may be different from many other re…

>Am I a burden on those around me? Yes? Well maybe that's okay, because being a "burden" doesn't have to be inherently bad.

Then all you have to do as a reader is personally define "burden" as "burden-that's-not-inherently-bad-which-is-okay" and therefore you mentally answer "no I'm not a burden" and the plea from the essay no longer applies.

Also, I don't assume the passion-chaser coerced the parent to pay unfairly. (That was your assumption of my answer.) What's unfair is up to the reader to decide.

Re: To fixate on finding work that makes us happy is a luxury

#60
post #59

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Okay... As a preface, when I say defining burden I'm using it in the context of this article and the question it poses. > Are you a burden to those around you? Where burden is being used as an attribute, i.e. to be a burden . This requires knowing what a burden is, which you actually stated yourself as being different from person to person. > your own idea of what is a burden which may be different from many other re…

>Am I a burden on those around me? Yes? Well maybe that's okay, because being a "burden" doesn't have to be inherently bad. Then all you have to do as a reader is personally define "burden" as "burden-that's-not-inherently-bad-which-is-okay" and therefore you mentally answer "no I'm not a burden" and the plea from the essay no longer applies. Also, I don't assume the passion-chaser coerced the parent to pay unfairly.…

Oh! So there's a bunch of context and nuance to the question? And a bunch of other questions that need to be asked about like what is bad and what is good (and what is okay), or why is it bad, or how long will it be bad? Because none of those things are discussed in the article.

That pretty much undermines most of the "value" of the article, it skips all those steps in the discussion and tries to sum it up under a single (universal) question. And then goes on a terrible rant about how people don't deserve their passions.

That's my entire point.

How about we just skip all that garbage (e.g. bullshit) about screwing your passions and just say: if you need a job, or if you need to pay bills, or if you want to be self-reliant, getting a job is a good way to fix or do those things?

Also, I never said anything about coercion, but it is implied by your use of the word make in the phrase: "don't make others (such as your parents) unfairly pay for your pursuit of passion." And I just cast a light on the implication.

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