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The psychology of stress and burnout

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Re: The psychology of stress and burnout

#171

Post by skybrian »

sheepmullet wrote: post #168
sedachv wrote: post #157

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It is very easy to fail as a restaurant because you signed the wrong lease/for the wrong place/at the wrong location/in the wrong neighborhood, or any combination thereof. Everyone I personally know in the food services industry works harder than anyone I know doing computer programming. Every task that happens in back and front of house has a very specific start time and a very specific duration allowance - there is…

The difference is the type of stress, the mental effort, and the expectations. At the end of a hard day in the kitchen I'm ready to go hang out with friends and enjoy my free time. At the end of a hard day as a software dev I can hardly string a sentence together and want to go be by myself. Likewise in the kitchen I didn't get given completely unrealistic timeframes. As long as I focused and worked hard it was all g…

Seems like you're describing the experience of being a worker? I expect someone starting their own restaurant has a whole new set of worries.

Re: The psychology of stress and burnout

#172

Post by beachstartup »

skybrian wrote: post #171
sheepmullet wrote: post #168

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The difference is the type of stress, the mental effort, and the expectations. At the end of a hard day in the kitchen I'm ready to go hang out with friends and enjoy my free time. At the end of a hard day as a software dev I can hardly string a sentence together and want to go be by myself. Likewise in the kitchen I didn't get given completely unrealistic timeframes. As long as I focused and worked hard it was all g…

Seems like you're describing the experience of being a worker? I expect someone starting their own restaurant has a whole new set of worries.

we're talking about workers, not management/ownership. e.g. like at apple, vice president in your title means the excuses stop mattering. it's your job to fix it, or you're fired, end of story.

Re: The psychology of stress and burnout

#173

Post by clifanatic »

beachstartup wrote: post #166
rubicon33 wrote: post #141

Earlier quoted context omitted.

And what we just witnessed were two fundamentally different ideologies, often at the root of the conflict between republicans and democrats. It's the "strong father" vs. "nurturing mother" dispositions.

o.p. has been in that situation for _10 years_. TEN YEARS. this is a tech job. tech workers are in high demand. he could find a new job if he wanted to. i mean come on.

> o.p. has been in that situation for _10 years_. TEN YEARS.

o.p. has had three different employers in 10 years (and actually this goes back more like 15 years, since "open offices" became a fad, and five different employers). Every place is exactly the same.

source: am o.p.

Re: The psychology of stress and burnout

#175

Post by sheepmullet »

big_youth wrote: post #119
CocaKoala wrote: post #78

Earlier quoted context omitted.

God please do everything you can to convince him not to open a bakery. The hours are brutal, the money is poor, the margins are slim, and the people are terrible. Customers, employees, vendors, they're all terrible. Baking for friends is a fun way to pass the time. Baking for money is a quick road to a second burn out; it was literally years before I was able to stomach the thought of baking cookies or bread for my w…

My father was a baker for a large portion of his life. It really is difficult work, with insane hours, for low pay. Maybe it's because I grew up in a working class mexican neighborhood where trades and unskilled work are the majority of occupations, but sitting in an office chair for 7hrs a day is paradise compared to baking, mechanics, or any type of manual labor.

> for low pay.

This is the real problem with manual labor, low-skilled labor, and jobs like baking.

The real stress isn't the day to day work, it's knowing that you are slowly wearing down your body but not earning enough to "get out of the game".

It's lack of financial security.

If as a baker you could buy a nice home and pay it off in 7-10 years it wouldn't be such a tough gig.

Re: The psychology of stress and burnout

#176

Post by wott »

saiya-jin wrote: post #58
Kenji wrote: post #19

I love how people are like "go for a walk" or "work out" or "sleep more" or "it's all in your head" (maybe you should tell someone who has pancreatic cancer "Oh it's all in your belly"). It seems to me like most people don't understand the incredible destructiveness and pain of an actual burnout. How trapped you are and how you do not see any way out anymore. I nearly got there and I have seen people who have been cr…

those are really helpful advices that can help you on track (apart from that head thingie). what else do you expect from people around you? we are all responsible for our own lives, people in burnout cause it by their life choices, in similar way as alcoholics.

They are not helpful at all. Everyone with half a brain knows what he should do, but it doesn't mean he can.

So not only it is not helpful, but it is infuriating to be repeatedly lectured about the same old wives' advices he already knows, as if he was stupid.

I won't even comment on the abyssal stupidity of your last sentence, you really have no clue of what you're talking about.

Re: The psychology of stress and burnout

#177

Post by manmal »

samsonradu wrote: post #138
reflexive wrote: post #123

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The thing that burns me out about freelance is the client just views you as a cost center. Always want more work in less time. I start to fantasize about the "camaraderie" of being on a team. Maybe there needs to be a Freelancer's Local Union.

I second this. Every time I drive by a big corporate building and I see groups of employees joking while having a smoke or coffee, it makes me envious. I joke about it saying that I m something like Batman who always works alone. Lately I ve been doing short trips to the client's offices, about 2000km away (on my expense) just to get the teamwork feeling.

Loneliness is the killer. I recently found out that I had this belief that the others don't need me around, and so they don't ask me for my company. That was actually self-victimization, because I should be the one to reach out when I want company. Doing much better now with that out of the way. This goes for every aspect of life, for me.

Re: The psychology of stress and burnout

#178

Post by CocaKoala »

agumonkey wrote: post #170
CocaKoala wrote: post #158

Earlier quoted context omitted.

When it all goes smoothly, it's a technical problem that can be solved mechanically or with a schedule that you know by heart after a few months. If you're curious, please don't hesitate to ask me how often things went smoothly.

Aight, forgive me for asking, I just never encountered this, most of the restaurant I worked at where more industrial than a bakery.

No worries (: It's hard to express how much of the mental stress comes from stuff going wrong. It can be exhausting to have to reassess the plan and come up with a new solution that will still get everything baked in a timely manner while making sure that nothing is over or under proofed, five or six times a day, every day.

Re: The psychology of stress and burnout

#180

Post by monksy »

hasbroslasher wrote: post #109
clifanatic wrote: post #82

I'm in one of those (inescapable) open-office nightmares right now. All day, every day, people are talking right next to me, making it impossible to concentrate. They're not even talking about work, they're talking about cars, or kids, or movies, or inane bullshit. I don't care that they're talking (and apparently management doesn't either, because since we're in a panopticon, if I know it, they know it too), but whe…

I have the same problem. Try listening to really long (unpwards of 10 minutes) songs or albums that really flow together. You want to avoid distraction and listen to things that are repetitive and don't require you to lose focus and fiddle with your music player. Another that I can't recommend enough is listening to old video game music. Something you love and played as a kid. For me it's N64: Zelda, Mario Kart, SM64…

Doom stoner metal is really good about this.

I.e. Sleep https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hIw7oeZKpZc

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