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Negative Emotions Are Key to Well-Being

scientificamerican.com

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Re: Negative Emotions Are Key to Well-Being

#61

Post by artifaxx »

ada1981 wrote: post #35
notliketherest wrote: post #8

Depression was a major part of Winston Churchill's life, and he used the phrase ‘Black Dog’ as a euphemism when talking to family and friends. Sometimes when I feel the negative emotions come to me (every few weeks / months), I think about that and I think about just walking alongside the black dog. It helps to remember that.

Often, depression is actually an avoidance of the underlying emotions -- very often anger. Unexpressed anger goes inward and is directed toward the self, which becomes experienced as depression.

Where did you read this? I am sure I am not the only one here who would love to read more to get a better idea.

Re: Negative Emotions Are Key to Well-Being

#62

Post by dvt »

alphapapa wrote: post #59
MarkPNeyer wrote: post #7

I just read "life of a slave" by frederick douglass. It's been helpful to calibrate my emotional responses. I try to treat emotion like sound or light - a signal from the outside world, with appropriate responses. When I get upset at things now, I compare whatever's bothering me to "being a slave, being whipped for teaching fellow slaves how to read the bible" - and i realize how unimportant the thing was. This abili…

Jesus did not go around saying, "Hey let's be nice," nor did he get crucified for saying that. Jesus called out the Jewish leaders of the day for being hypocrites, people who laid a heavy burden on their followers but did not live up to the standards they set, who made up and imposed strict rules while completely missing the point. They crucified him because they felt threatened by him, that their power structure wou…

I'm a Christian and I love this post, but this part:

> There is often a big difference between being nice and being good.

... made me all giddy as a philosophy major :)

Re: Negative Emotions Are Key to Well-Being

#63

Post by TeMPOraL »

jschwartzi wrote: post #60
altonzheng wrote: post #44

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The issue with depression is I think this emotional signaling can be entirely miscalibrated, and sometimes, you do you have to figure out a way to override those signals.

This can happen if you grew up in an abusive environment and learned that even people who are supposed to love you unconditionally can be dangerous.

This can happen anytime, and could since the times human life became more complicated than hunting and gathering and living in caves.

Negavive emotions (and physical pain) may be a warning, but I strongly wish I'd have more control over them. It reminds me of a typical scene from a naval or sci-fi movie, when something happens and there's an alarm siren blaring. The captain comes to bridge and asks some crewman to shut off the alarm sound. Because such a warning is useful until it's heard and understood, and then it's only seriously distracting. Much like negative emotions and physical pain.

Re: Negative Emotions Are Key to Well-Being

#64

Post by namaemuta »

oarla wrote: post #46
ageek123 wrote: post #34

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If the things you listed "Low opportunity, low-income, ..." actually caused depression, then most of the people in Africa, the Middle East, and much of Asia would be depressed, but this is obviously not the case. The causes of depression are complicated and aren't directly related to being poor in an absolute sense.

Exactly! A lot of people in developed and developing countries are depressed because they thought that wealth and materialistic possessions would bring them happiness, when all it got was more things to worry about.

Social standards are the principal causes of depression: too overweight, too skinny, too tall, too short, being single, not owning a house, not having a job, not owning a car, not having enough friends, not hanging out enough, not being noticed/praised enough, not smart enough... and the list goes on and on.

Re: Negative Emotions Are Key to Well-Being

#65

Post by whack »

I've often heard the exhortation to practice meditation, focus on your breathing and simply accept any thoughts/feelings without any judgement. For a long time, I simply thought that such teachings were some new-age feel-good psuedo-therapy. Yesterday, I happened to stumble across the book "The Inner of Tennis", and spent my entire evening devouring half the book. It made me realise how profound and powerful those teachings truly are. Give it a read if you find yourself dismissing such advice.

https://www.buzzfeed.com/reeveswiedeman/the-inner-game-of-ev...

Re: Negative Emotions Are Key to Well-Being

#66

Post by mr_spothawk »

wsinks wrote: post #42
ada1981 wrote: post #36

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yes. If you want to be more happy, be willing to feel more sadness ;)

As someone who is starting a new relationship where we are literally 10,000km away, this is my new normal. I feel intense jealous, anger, sadness when we are away, and we are close I am filled with pure bliss. Pure emotion.

keep that communication channel wide open. be vulnerable. be realistic. spend time finding ways to get closer, if you want it to last. but those facetimes and letters and long distance virtual hugs are a really valuable tool for learning about your partner, and yourself, and each other in the absence of abundant time to spend together. good luck, it's hard. but if you feel the real shit, get super dirty and roll around in it as hard as you can. be vulnerable, supportive. write for yourself. and for your partner. and be vulnerable twice as hard as you think is safe... just don't be unpleasant. happy days.

Re: Negative Emotions Are Key to Well-Being

#68

Post by norea-armozel »

I think there's a limit to those negative emotions in as much as long we suppress them then we can't recover from their cause. Like for me, my gender dysphoria has been a life long issue which has been associated with my depression and anxiety issues. Specifically, the more I suppressed my dysphoria the more depressed I've gotten (even more anxious). Conversely, the more I tried to suppress the depression and/or anxiety the more my dysphoria made me feel worse. Basically, a feel back loop of suck. So the key to dealing with negative emotions is figuring out what's wrong and either learning to cope with the cause of them or resolve the cause altogether (sometimes both as with me since I'm not ready to come out).

Re: Negative Emotions Are Key to Well-Being

#69

Post by alphapapa »

dvt wrote: post #62
alphapapa wrote: post #59

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Jesus did not go around saying, "Hey let's be nice," nor did he get crucified for saying that. Jesus called out the Jewish leaders of the day for being hypocrites, people who laid a heavy burden on their followers but did not live up to the standards they set, who made up and imposed strict rules while completely missing the point. They crucified him because they felt threatened by him, that their power structure wou…

I'm a Christian and I love this post, but this part: > There is often a big difference between being nice and being good. ... made me all giddy as a philosophy major :)

:) Studying some philosophy myself right now. Fun stuff if taught well.
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