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Why are Adults so busy?

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Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#191

Post by tim333 »

thebigspacefuck wrote: post #152

I keep catching myself thinking or using the excuse I have no time, but I mostly spend my time on the internet or watching TV. Some nights I do the dishes or actually go for a walk, go grocery shopping, but mostly I'm just hanging on, making sure I'm ready for he next day. I'm freaking addicted to information and the internet, which leave me feeling frantic. I forgo sleeping for the internet and it brings me little p…

I was about in the 70s and 80s. Still the same number of hours in the day and internet was largely replaced by reading and TV. I don't know if it was better or worse. I think I prefer the internet. At least you can type stuff into it unlike books and TV.

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#192

Post by ausjke »

I read the list, to my surprise it mentioned nothing about raising kids, which took away 40%+ of my daily energy averagely and is the sole/main reason I feel busy, not to mention all the arguments and emotional stress etc you have to deal with daily.

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#193

Post by zaroth »

mholmes680 wrote: post #182

I think one thing here was missed: managing [successful] relationships. I have 2 kids - i have to directly manage a relationship with my wife, with each kid, with both kids, and with my wife and both kids. She has to do the same. I have to indirectly manage a relationship between the two kids, and with the wife and both/each kids. To do it right would mean breaking up those 10 free hours I might have into each of the…

The OP clearly doesn't have kids for how glossed over the point is. Amazing that they come up with just 10 spare hours a week without even really factoring kids into the equation.

For those of us who have kids, you just sit back some days and wonder... How little we recognized at the time, the sheer freedom of being able to just head out for dinner or a drink any day of the week, plop down and watch whatever movie we wanted, sleep in on the weekends, etc.

OP does acknowledge the workload of having children is "indefinite" but doesn't really do justice to the reality of raising children.

The funny thing is how that theoretical 10 hours per week of free time will somehow make way for the ~40 hours per week spent on the children. Shopping for new shirts because they don't excite you anymore? Yeah, parents ain't got time for that BS!

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#194

Post by rdiddly »

jdimov10 wrote: post #13

The article doesn't really answer the question. It says adults are busy because they have too much stuff to do (duh..) But "why" is still a good question, and it remains unanswered. The answer is that, as we grow up, we tend to develop the belief that our well-being needs to be justified somehow. In other words, we start to believe that we are not by default worthy of living a good, joyful, care-free, abundant life..…

If you ask that "why" question like a 3-year-old - i.e. keep asking it repeatedly until you get to the reason behind the reason behind the reason, the answer you'll arrive at is entropy. You can surrender to it or work against it. How much order you want, determines how much work you'll have to do. Western society has a certain baseline level of order that takes a fair amount of work to maintain.

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#195

Post by grondilu »

denim_chicken wrote: post #164
grondilu wrote: post #126

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> We have to pay to exist? No. Existing is free. You have to pay in order to live in a dwelling you could not afford.

While raw "existence" is free, a sheltered existence is most certainly not. In many areas it is illegal to live in a tent or in a car, for example. It is also illegal to camp in a national forest for longer than 2 weeks.

> While raw "existence" is free, a sheltered existence is most certainly not.

I was replying to "We have to pay to exist?", not "We have to pay for a shelter?".

Being free to do something does not mean the means to accomplish it should be free of charge. I know lots of people think otherwise and therefore believe things like food, healthcare or accommodation should be given to them somehow for free, fortunately most people don't agree.

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#196

Post by Retric »

emodendroket wrote: post #159
thebigspacefuck wrote: post #152

I keep catching myself thinking or using the excuse I have no time, but I mostly spend my time on the internet or watching TV. Some nights I do the dishes or actually go for a walk, go grocery shopping, but mostly I'm just hanging on, making sure I'm ready for he next day. I'm freaking addicted to information and the internet, which leave me feeling frantic. I forgo sleeping for the internet and it brings me little p…

I'm guessing that many people who are now alive would have just sat in front of the TV instead if there were no Internet.

The internet on your phone is kind of uniquely addictive. You can basically replace any downtime with playing on your phone.

The sad thing is it can jump into the middle of any activity. Getting lunch, wait one second text message which you need to respond to right now.

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#197

Post by SerLava »

csydas wrote: post #69
dazc wrote: post #43

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Having grown up in the UK I've always felt guilty about not doing anything in my free time. Partly because everyone else seems to be living such a busy and rewarding existence (or so they would have me believe). Now, living in Spain, I feel it's OK not to do anything. Just sitting in the shade for 6 hours watching the world go by doesn't make me a weirdo, like it does back home.

Heh, I've noticed that Western culture does put a different emphasis on work ethics. After moving to Russia, I've just noticed a different approach to how work is perceived, and my partner and her mom have often cited this proverb at me: Работа не волк - в лес не убежит. Work is not a wolf, it will not run to the forest. Basically, the idea is work isn't going anywhere, so no need to worry that much about it. At my l…

>I guess it's just this perception that important people are busy

Perhaps but I'm sure the primary thought in their subconscious is "don't back down or they will punish you by inventing new burdens for you."

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#198

Post by [deleted] »

dangravell wrote: post #130
lucaspiller wrote: post #115

I'm going to go against the norm: I recently bought my first car (I'm nearly 30) and am amazed how much time it saves and freedom it gives me. I've always lived in European cities with good public transport, but even here having a car is worthwhile. Instead of taking a train and bus 30+ minutes to work, I leave when I want and know it will take me around 15 minutes to get there. Maybe I'm weird, but I find driving a…

I've got to say I've had the opposite experience, moving from London to rural England, where a car is necessary to have any sort of flexibility (to go to work, shop, take kids to nursery etc). I'm learning to hate cars. The damn things are a time sink. In the UK we have to take cars for MOT each year and generally we service once a year. That's two half days gone, but I try to make best use of the time by working in…

[deleted]

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#199

Post by kentt »

Since the article didn't answer the question of why, I'll submit a partial answer. People put a minimal value on their free time and so it gets sucked up with things of minimal value.

One place I've noticed this in that placing a high value on my own time comes off as self-important. As well, wondering why colleagues aren't placing a high value on their time, leave me bewildered.

Just the other day, a friend was showing me how he was playing around with React to create a calculator to show how much money he could save by getting gas over the border. Since we're on a US/Canada border town, we can save 5-10 dollars by filling up over the border. He's made his calculator just to help learn React. I asked him why he went to the US to get gas and he told me it was to save money. $5! It makes the 5 min job of getting gas into a 30 min chore. He's a freelancer which I think my company pays around ~100/hr. He doesn't think this is strange and no one else who was listening did.

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#200

Post by pc86 »

Retric wrote: post #196
emodendroket wrote: post #159

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm guessing that many people who are now alive would have just sat in front of the TV instead if there were no Internet.

The internet on your phone is kind of uniquely addictive. You can basically replace any downtime with playing on your phone. The sad thing is it can jump into the middle of any activity. Getting lunch, wait one second text message which you need to respond to right now.

I think it's rarely that you actually need to respond to any text message immediately.
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