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Why are Adults so busy?

debarghyadas.com

21–30 of 485 posts

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#21
The numbers seemed very high to me so I created a list on my own and thought I'd share it (single, no kids, full time job).

1. Work: 40 hours

2. Cooking: 3 h (who the hell cooks three times a day?)

3. Laundry: 0.5 h (once a week)

4. Cleaning: 1 h (and I am very clean, I just avoid producing dirt)

5. Buying stuff: .5 h (I try to avoid buying too much stuff I don't really need)

6. Bills: 0 h (they a are paid automatically from my account)

7. Small errands: 1 h

8. Transport: 4 h (I ride my bicycle to work, so one could count that as exercise)

9. Staying healthy: 4 h (in addition to the bicycling to and from work)

10. Finances: 0 h (I have no idea how anyone can spend so much time on this. I just live by the simple rule: don't get into debt and move some of your income automatically on a saving account)

11. Taxes: 0 h (automated in Germany)

12. Responsibility for Yourself: 0 h (weird point)

13. Responsibility for your dependents: 0 h (I'm not responsible for anyone and visiting my family is fun)

14. Being sick: 0 h

15. One time errands: 2 h (I have to do some irregular stuff)

16. Long term planning: 1h (because I'm actively thinking about it at the moment)

1. Attire and Grooming: 3.5 h (half an hour every morning, 3 minutes in the evening)

2. Sleep: 49 h

3. Eating: 1.5 h (breakfast and lunch is included in work time)

Overall: 109 h

Free time: 49 h

I think it all comes down to priorities and you current life situation. But one can influence most of these things and you have to decide what is really important in your life. For me, it's free time.

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#22
post #12

When I look at my 4 yr old son, what really strikes me is the way he lives in the moment. He does not care about the future one single bit. He does what he wants to do (or has to do) and that is his entire world at that moment. No worries, no planning, no "I have to save some energy because I still have to do X in 2 hours and then Y, and when am I finally going to finish Z?" He just goes until he drops. When he comes…

To be fair, it's a lot easier to live in the moment when the planning is someone else's responsibility, i.e. Your son can live in the moment because you're the one buying the food, paying the bills :-)

That is of course true, but do you have to think about the shopping now, when you know you will do it at 20:00?

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#24
post #22

Earlier quoted context omitted.

To be fair, it's a lot easier to live in the moment when the planning is someone else's responsibility, i.e. Your son can live in the moment because you're the one buying the food, paying the bills :-)

That is of course true, but do you have to think about the shopping now, when you know you will do it at 20:00?

Well, to do it at 20:00 may involve a chain-reaction of related decisions that affect your behavior "now".

- When should I leave to get there by 20:00?

- Can I do something else along the way?

- What can I get done before then?

etc. etc.

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#25
post #3

OMG, that was a dreadful reading. And definitely, as an adult my life feels quite more easy and manageable than what she says, and I work, clean, cook, watch netflix, practice sport, and meet my friends besides all the other adult obligations.

How much time do you spend taking care of kids? That's the real time sink of adulthood (not just childcare itself, but also all the extra strain it generates in terms of household work, cleaning, etc).

10 years ago I had all the time in the world, even though I was an adult - a single, childless adult.

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#26
post #4

I have scaled back years ago: ditched the car ( does away with a whole class of problems/bills ). When I had a job no more than 32hrs. No TV, no cable. Do my groceries in combination with going the postal office, while biking/walking. I rent, do not own. Try to own as little as possible. I call it the 'small life'. Lots of people in town know me, I know them, build a pretty social life. I am not going back.

I'd love that life style but I have to work.

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#27

The article doesn't really answer the question. It says adults are busy because they have too much stuff to do (duh..) But "why" is still a good question, and it remains unanswered. The answer is that, as we grow up, we tend to develop the belief that our well-being needs to be justified somehow. In other words, we start to believe that we are not by default worthy of living a good, joyful, care-free, abundant life..…

> It says adults are busy because they have too much stuff to do (duh..) But "why" is still a good question,

The article says that adults work, commute, clean, cook, take care of their dependent and so on... they don't do that to justify their existence but because it has to be done, unless you're rich enough to find other people doing these things for you...

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#29

The article doesn't really answer the question. It says adults are busy because they have too much stuff to do (duh..) But "why" is still a good question, and it remains unanswered. The answer is that, as we grow up, we tend to develop the belief that our well-being needs to be justified somehow. In other words, we start to believe that we are not by default worthy of living a good, joyful, care-free, abundant life..…

> we start to believe that we are not by default worthy of living a good, joyful, care-free, abundant life.. unless it is "deserved".

That may be your own personal motivation, but it is far from a generalization or even shared by many people.

For instance, people do work to make a living. For some people, making a living means paying the rent and put food on the table. For others, it means affording luxuries and materialist goals. Most people do need to work to cover these expenses, and the higher they cost the harder they need to work for them. This is the norm.

Then there are also other motivations. Some people decide to become entrepreneurs not because they seek riches, but because they believe they are able to create something new, something that no one else can provide, and believe that they have an obligation to be a source of progress and push the world forward in their own personal way.

Re: Why are Adults so busy?

#30

The numbers seemed very high to me so I created a list on my own and thought I'd share it (single, no kids, full time job). 1. Work: 40 hours 2. Cooking: 3 h (who the hell cooks three times a day?) 3. Laundry: 0.5 h (once a week) 4. Cleaning: 1 h (and I am very clean, I just avoid producing dirt) 5. Buying stuff: .5 h (I try to avoid buying too much stuff I don't really need) 6. Bills: 0 h (they a are paid automatica…

You say free time is your priority, but even with this ideal list (it makes some very unrealistic assumptions) your free time is only 50% of your responsibilities time.
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