Introducing “Ask a Female Engineer”

Ah, I see what you mean. I can't really speak to that from my own experience, which was that of a gay man married to a woman who set great store in the idea that she had turned him straight. (She had not, of course. She merely found him too young to have realized that what one's body says at any given time need not be taken as the final word on anything, and went to a great deal of effort to deny him that realization.)

Perhaps a place to start might be: What would we say of a man who only cares to keep his wife away from other men?

I'm not single. I'm a woman, even. And I have the exact same theory as he does. I expect to be able to be friends with whomever the hell I like, and my husband has the same. I don't have to spend time around his friends if I don't want to, and the same for him.

I have a good enough relationship that we can both express distrust for the friend, but that isn't something binding or obligatory to follow. If I find myself jealous, that is a problem I need to overcome and not take out on him and I expect him to do the same. I don't have reasons not to trust him, and if one doesn't trust their spouse, perhaps they should address that issue.

I'd not enter into a long-term relationship thinking this wasn't the case, honestly.

Sounds like you got some issues if you are letting someone annoy you, in a forum where you are not forced to participate.

So according to you the point is that it should be OK for anyone to start any group they want , however its not ok to ask any question.

On a good note despite your hypocrisy on allowing any subject to be created while controlling the questions that can be asked, you atleast have been consistent.

You have been consistent in making personal attacks and dodging the questions on the value of stating "Female" engineer. Good job!

I never said it was wrong to start the thread with that title, I just questioned the purpose or value to include female the in title.

> emphatic male absolutely does know more about what "women are going through" than

Did you mean a different word here? Because as far as I've seen, the emphatic males are the biggest problem in this context.

> You know nothing about what others think about, what they know or don't know.

Do you recognize the multiple ironies in this statement?

Yes, I'm generalizing. That is a necessity in discussions about broad characteristics. You don't have to have a Not All Men explosion [1] because you don't feel like a general statement doesn't fit you perfectly. If you think you're better than average, good for you. Not everything written for a broad audience has to be about you; you can move on and read the next comment.

> Why not simply recognize the psychological make-up of people by dealing with them, not by gender or nationality or other statistical probabilities.

I agree with part of this, in that people have wide variation in nature and experience and I want to respect that, not put them in little boxes for my convenience. But there are useful correlations between external appearance and experience, especially where that experience is about how people are treated.

For example, when walking at night in my urban neighborhood, I go well out of my way to give women a lot of space, to not walk too close to them for too long. I'll slow down, pass them, cross the street, get on a different train car, or take an alternate route altogether. Why? Because women are highly likely to have experienced street harassment, stalking, or worse. To them, I'm Shrödinger's Rapist. [2] There's no need for me to make a personal inquiry into their history and psychology, which would be hella creepy and would ruin the effect I'm trying to have, which is just to give them room.

And giving women a different sort of room is what I was arguing for above. Your rant mainly seems to be about things that I didn't say. If you'd like critique some points I actually made, that would be swell, but for now I stand by everything I wrote.

As an aside, you seem to be tacking dangerously close to the shores of "I don't see color", which has a lot of issues. [3]

[1] https://www.google.com/search?q=not+all+men

[2] http://geekfeminism.wikia.com/wiki/Schr%C3%B6dinger's_Rapist

[3] https://www.google.com/search?q=i+don't+see+color

Not an American also, as my view is based on the Swedish work market and culture.

When I say nurse is a less desired job, I mean that in the number of student applications and average grade requirements. That is not to say that nurse profession is an unattractive job. It just that all professions are not equally desired, and statistics on student choice and student competition reflects that.

Btw, nurse profession in Sweden is commonly 3 years, which is common for hands on professions like welders, plumbers, painters, musicians, carpenters and so on. Engineering is commonly 4 years, similar to veterinarian. Its the difference between master degree and bachelor's degree.

I do not think its a major leap that professions with master degree requirements is generally considered to be more desired, has generally a higher pay rate, and is generally fought over more harshly. As such, comparing two professions with master degree requirements makes more sense.