I remember asking for a cap table at a startup and in not so few words, was told to fuck off. At that point I realized it didn't matter how many options I had, I was going to get screwed should there be an exit, and made my own.
I am not going to lock up a huge portion of my expendable compensation in an "investment" that's designed to benefit people besides me on the hopes that the company is one of the few successes to come to market. There are too many horror stories going on right now that the VCs are trying to keep quiet for me to trust most startups.