Ask HN: Failed interview, feeling unemployable and depressed – what do I do?

When I first joined IBM research right out of school I thought that everyone would be some Einstein and I would be blown away. And at first I was, with everyone talking acronyms and things that just flew over my head. But over time, I realised the place was run by only a few truly smart people and the rest were just regular 9-5'rs. Don't ever compare yourself to anyone. Another memory: I played pro tennis years ago and I would watch some player and think "OMG, this guy is amazing", but I never knew that this guy was probably looking at me and saying the same things. I learned not to care about appearances or be intimidated by someone off court. I learned that the only thing that matters is when I'm on the court, playing against him and trying to kick his ass. Nothing else mattered.

And jumping ship is not the answer. My mother said a great thing: "when you move, you take yourself with you". If you have deluded thoughts and rely on external validation, then why do you think moving will solve this?

This isn't good or anything (though, sometimes there's the really obvious super slow way, and its appropriate to ask for something better), its just the way it is.

This is especially pronounced with junior interviewers, I've gotten dinged for missing capitalization on one variable in an otherwise flawless exercise.

Most interviewers at these company, especially those with little empathy or training, are looking to rule you out, and are looking to find a problem with whatever it is you do. Sometimes they tell themselves that its because they want to keep a high bar, but its usually just so they can feel better than someone else, they aren't good at judging problem solving ability, only that you arrived at the solution that they had in mind.

I've had offers from the Big 4, and I've totally bombed interviews with them too. I prepared a lot before hand, and its mostly just luck of the draw, if I get a set of coding questions I've seen before, or is similar to what I've seen, I pass, if I don't, I don't. I'm the same engineer either way.

I wish a lot of people in our industry would quit with the alpha nerd crap, you aren't that important, and you're pissing on people that could help you build your project. I think its egged on by the "A players all the time" mantra at large tech organizations, so when you take insecure nerds, and puff their egos up, this is what you get.

Just focus on yourself and your job.