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Ask HN: Spending my free time in video games. It's eating me. Suggestions?

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Re: Ask HN: Spending my free time in video games. It's eating me. Suggestions?

#31

Post by avindroth »

avindroth wrote: post #20

If you are having trouble with recognizing delayed gratification, place play into the bin of work. Start numbering and comparing everything you do (work and play). You will start comparing playing video games to working out, and see that over your entire lifetime, the latter makes you happier. Another timeless advice is sleep well, exercise, and read. But you probably know that.

Apparently couldn't edit? Wanted to add some personal details.

I was addicted to Dota 2, SSBM, and Hearthstone for a while; I have around 1.5 k hours logged on Dota 2, and that's not counting reddit time. Probably much longer on the latter two games. Untracked time.

But now even with gorgeous gaming setup (I just gamed on a mac before), I don't game for too long. I play Witcher 3 for around 2 hours and then stop. Why? How?

The biggest motivation was getting hospitalized and having a sensible schedule. I started sleeping earlier, eating at the right times, etc. What kept me going after the hospital was something else, though.

I made a priority list for everything (work & play). I now know that they (work & play) all contribute to my overall satisfaction in my life (former is usually delayed and latter is usually instant), and I live to optimize that satisfaction over time.

I plan to write a blog post sequence for this, but uggh... So I propose an available alternative.

The best place to start for "living well" would be the beginning part of "Rationality: From AI to Zombies" by Eliezer Yudkowsky[1]. This book helps you with instrumental rationality, which is the art of living. Highly recommended, even for a few chapters. The book is free as well.

Prioritize prioritization. Good luck, I feel you on how hard it must feel like to get out of that. Trust me, once you get out, it's even harder to fall back into the gaming mode.

[1]: https://wiki.lesswrong.com/wiki/Sequences

Re: Ask HN: Spending my free time in video games. It's eating me. Suggestions?

#32

Post by avindroth »

steve371 wrote: post #19

If you work and have a normal social life. I don't see the problem of playing video games. You should have some resting/down time. Don't treat it as wasting of time, it is actually a quality time that ppl needs. If you want to focus on more time to do something else, find a buddy to do it together or find a motivation may help.

Self-hatred is the problem.

You know you don't enjoy playing video games in the long run, but you end up doing it. Not a simple case of "Don't worry," because OP doesn't want to do it.

Re: Ask HN: Spending my free time in video games. It's eating me. Suggestions?

#33

Post by crazypyro »

eswat wrote: post #29
riotvan wrote: post #25

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yeah I need to start doing this. Ima start buying quality games. Already uninstalled CSGO. Screw that game. Thanks for that point of view.

CSGO and the previous games were also my crack and those of my friends. But it's clear now that it's morphed into something that I would rather not be a part of. The betting website shenangians from the past month were a symptom of deeper problem with that game and its community. You'll definitely find something that would make better use of that time you had filled with CSGO, whether it's a game or not.

Not sure that its so much a symptom of a deeper problem as much as the fact that E-sports in general are a new industry and growing considerably. The amount of people involved in the counter-strike scene is at least 3-4 magnitudes larger than it was 7-8 years ago.

Re: Ask HN: Spending my free time in video games. It's eating me. Suggestions?

#34

Post by caethan »

Here's the framework that I've found useful for thinking about this in my own life. There's three ways to spend your time: work, rest, and leisure.

Work is all the things you need to do to live your life. This includes your job, errands, housework, etc. Things that you can't give up because they're a necessary part of your life.

Rest is all the things you need to do to be able to do your work. Sleep, food, exercise, and yes, TV & video games for relaxing can fit in here too.

Leisure is everything else - what you do with the time you've got left after working and resting.

The real question for you is: are you playing video games to rest, or for leisure? If they're restful for you, then I don't see the problem. You've got a busy job, a thesis, and n SO that you're all keeping up with. Everyone needs some downtime, so if you're feeling rested and relaxed afterwards, then great. Keep them as a part of your downtime routine. The one thing you may want to think about here is if video games are the best way to rest for you. If you're playing shooters and getting frustrated and angry, that's probably not as effective at relaxing as, say, building a castle with redstone circuitry in Minecraft. Or even cooking a tasty meal or going for a walk.

If you're filling your leisure time with them, then I'd think about it a little harder. Is there anything else you'd prefer to be doing with that leisure time? Leisure time is what you get to use to change yourself - to learn things, to exercise, to make yourself into who you want. So spend it wisely.

And seriously, cut out the commute. I suspect part of the problem may be that you really need all that rest time with video games but resent that you need it. Work from home, change your work hours so you're not commuting during rush hour, find a different job, whatever.

Re: Ask HN: Spending my free time in video games. It's eating me. Suggestions?

#35

Post by eswat »

crazypyro wrote: post #33
eswat wrote: post #29

Earlier quoted context omitted.

CSGO and the previous games were also my crack and those of my friends. But it's clear now that it's morphed into something that I would rather not be a part of. The betting website shenangians from the past month were a symptom of deeper problem with that game and its community. You'll definitely find something that would make better use of that time you had filled with CSGO, whether it's a game or not.

Not sure that its so much a symptom of a deeper problem as much as the fact that E-sports in general are a new industry and growing considerably. The amount of people involved in the counter-strike scene is at least 3-4 magnitudes larger than it was 7-8 years ago.

CSGO has a lot of players but compared to other popular games with their own economies - with exception to perhaps EVE Online - they don't have as many problems with shady item selling/trading markets as CSGO has. Look at DOTA2 for example.

Re: Ask HN: Spending my free time in video games. It's eating me. Suggestions?

#36

Post by ganset »

riotvan wrote: post #15
partisan wrote: post #8

That commute is killing you. So is the perception that you aren't doing anything if you aren't doing something all of the time. Give yourself a break. Everyone needs to have an outlet and video games happen to be on the lower end of the scale in terms of harmful outlets. Now you just need to forgive yourself for being human. If you are intent on removing video games from your life, please replace it with something th…

I don't feel depressed but I think you nailed it with " So is the perception that you aren't doing anything if you aren't doing something all of the time". Every time since I started reading stuff about self improvement (2 years ago) that, everytime I touch on video games I feel bad about it and that I should be focusing on something else. It's a constant inner struggle that it's hard to win.

Have you tried listening to podcasts during the commute? I've found that doing so helps me fit in some extra "learning" time that would otherwise just be me sitting in traffic.

I can give some recommendations of the ones I listen to if you're interested! Mostly front end development / shop talk type stuff.

Re: Ask HN: Spending my free time in video games. It's eating me. Suggestions?

#37

Post by jason_slack »

How are you spending your commute? Are you driving? Or taking a train? If you aren't driving, perhaps you can use that 15 hours a week to read, learn a new skill. Then when you are burned out from work and play video games you won't beat yourself up about it.

Also, count the video games as stress relief. We all need that.

Re: Ask HN: Spending my free time in video games. It's eating me. Suggestions?

#39

Post by mchan »

riotvan wrote: post #26
mchan wrote: post #21

Some really good points and advice here. I just want to add: you're 22. What you are experiencing is totally normal. Everyone goes through this struggle at some point in their lives - not necessarily with video games, it can be with other things. The guilt is a perfectly normal reaction to the situation, so no need to beat yourself up about it. What you are feeling are two opposing needs that need to be met - both ar…

I always have trouble finding the real motivation and reasons behind things. I just don't what is the real questions I should be asking myself. For me, finding the why in things is sometimes really difficult. For instance, about exercising: I know that I should exercise so I'm healthier and live longer, but that reason alone sometimes isn't enough for me to get up in the morning and go for the jog. I guess I have a h…

That's OK. Sometimes it takes time to find the real motivation behind something. Sometimes it doesn't make sense either, and that's OK, because it doesn't have to make sense, despite your mind thinking that it should. It takes an honesty with yourself to acknowledge those motivations as well. The key is to not beat yourself up about it too much. The more you do that, the more resistance you will feel about it.

"What you resist, persists"

Re: Ask HN: Spending my free time in video games. It's eating me. Suggestions?

#40

Post by riotvan »

ganset wrote: post #36
riotvan wrote: post #15

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I don't feel depressed but I think you nailed it with " So is the perception that you aren't doing anything if you aren't doing something all of the time". Every time since I started reading stuff about self improvement (2 years ago) that, everytime I touch on video games I feel bad about it and that I should be focusing on something else. It's a constant inner struggle that it's hard to win.

Have you tried listening to podcasts during the commute? I've found that doing so helps me fit in some extra "learning" time that would otherwise just be me sitting in traffic. I can give some recommendations of the ones I listen to if you're interested! Mostly front end development / shop talk type stuff.

I listen to some podcasts, but would love to hear your recommendations!
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