> 1. I don't have GBs of free memory for ZFS
ZFS does not require large amounts of RAM any more, unless you want to benefit from its impressive caching features and have large amounts of disk space.
> 2. I don't have GB of RAM, CPU and HD space to build everything from ports, and most importantly, no need.
Since FreeBSD 10, pkg-ng has been the standard. It unifies binary packages installable similar to apt and other linux package managers with your custom ports built packages as needed. Now you can mix and match seamlessly and there is no need to have an entire ports tree unless you have special needs.
> 3. License - I don't care. GPL is free enough for me.
Each to their own, but MIT and BSD are, to me, free-er and more friendly to business applications.
> 4. Base vs. Ports - Why should I care? Debian (testing!) is stable enough for me. Except for dist-upgrades, I never ran into issues, and then it may be faster to nuke the server from orbit. Now had BSD "appified" the /usr/local directory (rather than keeping the nginx binary in /usr/local/bin and conf in /usr/local/conf it would have kept everything related to nginx in a /usr/local/nginx) it would have been interesting, but now?
The layout you're discussing is basically what happens by default when things are `make install`ed most times without any customizations. The layout that you're lamenting makes sense enough and has merits, with no need to be "appified" -- that is what packages are for. Again, I implore you to check out pkg-ng, it is a core feature of the OS now.
> 5. systemd? The reason Debian went with systemd was (IIRC) because they didn't have the manpower to undo all of RedHat's work in forcing all applications to integrate into systemd (such as GNOME). I don't know how FreeBSD is doing in that regard
People are experimenting with alternative init systems in the BSD world, though we will likely never directly have SystemD, there are some efforts to support systemd unit files as well as some new directions taking into account Apple's work as well as lessons learned from systemd to build a BSD licensed alternative to all of the above.
> But FreeBSD?
FreeBSD brings to the table a free, cohesive, highly engineered and integrated operating system that is coming into its prime. There are a multitude of advanced features in terms of filesystems, networking, and more. FreeBSD has first class support in AWS and some other major cloud environments. However, FreeBSD has been and continues to be a server focused operating system. Even so, FreeBSD on the desktop is coming along, but it's certainly nowhere near linux in that regard.
In the end, each to their own, if you find a reason to like and use it, then great, but at the least you should look into it and learn what you can from it, like any system.