Earlier quoted context omitted.
I don't know what you consider "empirical proof", but it seems obvious to me. And should be obvious to anyone competent who has ever had to scale stuff. A system fails to scale when it has a bottleneck, and that bottleneck gets overwhelmed. You make it scale better by scaling the bottleneck, which can be done by moving work out of the bottleneck, or by parallelizing it in some way. The natural bottleneck for any syst…
When it comes to data validation, none of what you just said applies, because you need to perform your work inside a transaction. You can validate the data outside your database and then confirm that nothing's changed (optimistic concurrency control) but you can do that just as easily inside the database, with lower latency and greater throughput (and in situations with lots of contention this can lead to many more a…
Now it is easy to screw up an application. It is easy to screw up a database design. It is easy to screw up queries and query plans. But all of those are fixable in relatively straightforward ways. And once you do that, you will wind up with database throughput as your bottleneck.
As for NoSQL, the problem is this. Moving to that architecture requires taking an up front hit on transactional complexity, usually requires several times the hardware (data needs to be stored multiple times for hardware failure), puts a lot of stress on your network and latency, and is really easy to screw up. Just using a popular out of the box solution is not enough - see https://aphyr.com/tags/jepsen for a list of real failure modes on stuff that will look perfectly fine in testing.
It is a necessary challenge to accept if you want to go beyond a certain scale. But you should not accept that challenge unless you have good reason to do so.