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Ask HN: How do I deal with the first sexual harassment complaint at my startup?

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31–40 of 622 posts

Re: Ask HN: How do I deal with the first sexual harassment complaint at my startup?

#31
Definitely talk to a lawyer if you don't already have clear HR processes to handle this. It doesn't seem to me like a particularly egregious case, but mishandling it could be trouble down the line in a number of ways, and you need not only to handle it, but to be more prepared to handle -- and if possible prevent -- the next one.

Re: Ask HN: How do I deal with the first sexual harassment complaint at my startup?

#32

This is why I'll never be in any significant management position. I have no interest in babysitting grown up children. My reaction would be to just fire both.

>My reaction would be to just fire both. What did the existing employee do to deserve such treatment?

Maybe the OP hasn't shared all information but if asking someone out and/or complimenting someone's appearance (albeit crudely) is now the equivalent of sexual harassment then be prepared for a rapid decline in population since no one will want to be the first one to make a move.

Re: Ask HN: How do I deal with the first sexual harassment complaint at my startup?

#33

1. Talk to your attorney, yes. 2. Probably: fire this guy. This isnt someone you want at your company. When you fire him, you wont announce to the rest of the company why. And you can have a conversation with the victim employee to let them know why you did it: you don't want abusive people on the team, and that you value every employee and also have to look out for everyone and the entire business. The employee will…

^ this is exactly what I would do. She doesn't want the guilt of "getting" someone fired, so find a way to make it your issue and absolve her of her concerns.

Re: Ask HN: How do I deal with the first sexual harassment complaint at my startup?

#34
Lawyer is good advice.

If it's not acceptable in the company then you should tell him to leave.

If you don't you poison your culture.

The employee now knows that she will still need to "deal with" harassment at this organization. Her outlook on the company culture will be forever changed. And she will share this experience with her friends and potential recruits forever.

Likewise the harasser will know that there are not serious consequences for unacceptable behavior and will continue to "get away with" things. He will repeat the behavior among his friends and towards future staff. They may not have the confidence to report it.

This is one of the root causes of the gender imbalance in the work place.

Harassment is never ok.

This needs to be explicit and you should work hard to build a team where there is complete trust that violations will not occur.

Re: Ask HN: How do I deal with the first sexual harassment complaint at my startup?

#35
post #24

I really don't understand the environment around sex and relationships in the work place. It's messed up. Someone should be able to express interest and the other person should be able to refuse it. Simple as that. But instead there is a whole drawn out ritual around these things. It's not really grown up thing that adults do, instead any male is looked at as an aggressive offender looking to rape someone, unless the…

It's one thing to nurture a relationship with a coworker and have it develop into something bigger. It's carnal and rude to ask someone out when you've just joined the company. Like, have some decency to get your foot in the door before you whip your dick out.

Re: Ask HN: How do I deal with the first sexual harassment complaint at my startup?

#36

This is why I'll never be in any significant management position. I have no interest in babysitting grown up children. My reaction would be to just fire both.

This will inevitably conclude with your employer settling a claim of retaliatory treatment subsequent to reporting sexual harassment for a sum of +/- $500k and with you being fired. Your competent legal advisor will, accordingly, recommend against retaliating against the reporting employee, even if you consider this issue beneath your notice. The laws of the United States on this matter are relatively well-settled and they do not agree with your opinion on this matter.

Re: Ask HN: How do I deal with the first sexual harassment complaint at my startup?

#37
post #24

I really don't understand the environment around sex and relationships in the work place. It's messed up. Someone should be able to express interest and the other person should be able to refuse it. Simple as that. But instead there is a whole drawn out ritual around these things. It's not really grown up thing that adults do, instead any male is looked at as an aggressive offender looking to rape someone, unless the…

I find all these laws around sexual harassment strange and confusing too. Where I live, it's not sexual harassment unless you grabbed somebody's ass or demand sex/sexual favors using your authority. Saves a lot of nerves for everybody. I don't see anything bad one adult person asking other adult person out and showing sexual interest in non-violent, non-demanding way and accepting "no" for an answer (as far as story goes).

EDIT: despite all downvotes, it's interesting to watch cultural differences in this situation.

Re: Ask HN: How do I deal with the first sexual harassment complaint at my startup?

#38
post #36

This is why I'll never be in any significant management position. I have no interest in babysitting grown up children. My reaction would be to just fire both.

This will inevitably conclude with your employer settling a claim of retaliatory treatment subsequent to reporting sexual harassment for a sum of +/- $500k and with you being fired. Your competent legal advisor will, accordingly, recommend against retaliating against the reporting employee, even if you consider this issue beneath your notice. The laws of the United States on this matter are relatively well-settled an…

Again, that's why I'll never be in a managerial position.

Re: Ask HN: How do I deal with the first sexual harassment complaint at my startup?

#39

Not a lawyer. When the female employee says she doesn't want to cause trouble, it just means that, if you are going to do something about this situation, then you better own it. Make this a problem between you and the employee who acted inappropriately. i.e. if/when he demonstrates understandable reasons for acting the way he did, you don't turn this around on her.

Respectfully, that's not the employee's decision to make.

Re: Ask HN: How do I deal with the first sexual harassment complaint at my startup?

#40
IANAL so talk to your lawyer first. Second write a policy regarding sexual harassement, make it sign by every employee, so it's clear this kind of behavior should not be tolerated.

The thing is if goes out of hand and for whatever reason the victim changes her mind and decides to sue you on the ground that you did nothing to prevent it you're f--cked. I've seen this before. So it's really about covering your ass and the reputation of your business. I think there are enough examples ( Github, Google ...) to prove my point.

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