On the other hand, I don't want to be condescended to by managers that invite me to meetings about improving me , assessing my personality, helping me "grow." I want to help improve the product , and the most fundamental way to engage me with that is to ask me for input and take my ideas & concerns seriously. Just coffee and a chat every now and then is a great setting for that. No need for made-up agendas and bullet…
On the third hand, if you have some kind of career goals, then you probably want to be making some kind of progress towards them. While it's not always possible to discuss such goals with your employer (eg. if your goal is "become the CTO" and your immediate manager's goal is also "become the CTO" then discussing this with them is likely to end poorly), it's important to at least let them know which direction you wan…
I've seen this happen at an even bigger scale. The site I was part of was very successful, and was therefore completely unable to get any time or capital to do independent (non-contract) projects. And some of the projects we wanted to do were to improve our IP holdings within the space we were working! Meanwhile, the entire site that lost two contracts to rebids all got put on cool, independent, green-field projects. Completely bananas, and a symptom of a much larger problem of not rewarding success that eventually caused me to leave.