I can very much relate to this; my motto is "you don't own stuff; the stuff owns you". And every time I've moved, I was amazed at just how much stuff one (even unwillingly) accumulates, and how liberating it feels to get rid of it.
I also prefer to own just a few high quality and/or useful things over having a 'ton of crap'.
Why I don't want stuff
11–20 of 332 posts
Re: Why I don't want stuff
#12I can very much relate to this; my motto is "you don't own stuff; the stuff owns you". And every time I've moved, I was amazed at just how much stuff one (even unwillingly) accumulates, and how liberating it feels to get rid of it. I also prefer to own just a few high quality and/or useful things over having a 'ton of crap'.
Yup. Which is why as I said elsewhere:
Give me the gift of recognizing my preference for no material gifts.
Or toilet paper. I'll eventually make use of and need TP. (It helps remove crap! ;)
Re: Why I don't want stuff
#13Every time I have a birthday I am terribly worried about receiving some gift that I won't like from people who don't know me good enough but want to give me some present. Receiving a gift that I don't like and having to avoid showing that I don't really like it is worse than receiving nothing. In fact I have enough money to buy anything I want myself, so there is really nothing I would like to receive as a gift.
In fact I have enough money to buy anything I want myself, so there is really nothing I would like to receive as a gift. That sounds like a closed mentality to me, you never know really, someone might just surprise you.
Someone will win the lottery too, but that doesn't mean it's a good idea to buy it.
Re: Why I don't want stuff
#14Every time I have a birthday I am terribly worried about receiving some gift that I won't like from people who don't know me good enough but want to give me some present. Receiving a gift that I don't like and having to avoid showing that I don't really like it is worse than receiving nothing. In fact I have enough money to buy anything I want myself, so there is really nothing I would like to receive as a gift.
In fact I have enough money to buy anything I want myself, so there is really nothing I would like to receive as a gift. That sounds like a closed mentality to me, you never know really, someone might just surprise you.
Of course it is possible than someone would give me something really nice, it happens with some of my closest friends and relatives. But in the case of strangers or people I know for 1 or 2 years only the chance of a bad surprise and its consequences, such as having to pretend I like gift and worrying about questions about it some time later, outweigh. The risk is just too high.
Re: Why I don't want stuff
#15I don't live quite like this, but I feel similarly about gifts: I far prefer them to be practical rather than decorative or frivolous. I've realised that people can get slightly upset when I explain it to them. They want to buy me something fun, something I'll "enjoy". Chances are I won't, although I do of course appreciate the sentiment. Equally, I find it more satisfying to buy a "useful" gift for others. And of co…
Refrigerator door culture. At some point in life you will no longer be permitted not to have magnets on your fridge. I made it until I got married.
Weaponized clothes are a thing too. Everyone knows nobody likes getting someone elses choice of clothes as a gift, especially not kids, but it is a socially acceptable weapon to kinda "get" the recipient. More a slap to the face than a punch to the face, but none the less kinda an aggressive act.
Re: Why I don't want stuff
#16I don't live quite like this, but I feel similarly about gifts: I far prefer them to be practical rather than decorative or frivolous. I've realised that people can get slightly upset when I explain it to them. They want to buy me something fun, something I'll "enjoy". Chances are I won't, although I do of course appreciate the sentiment. Equally, I find it more satisfying to buy a "useful" gift for others. And of co…
I've come to prefer giving (often cheap) gifts that are intended to be disposed of, but lead to a bit of fun.
Quick example: I got my family (parents, sister, cousins, etc; no kids right now) a bunch of santa hats from the doller store for christmas that were each a little different and one was technically a chair cover (but looked like an incredibly oversized hat). Then I let them duke it out over who got which hat. Also shutter shades.
They still talk about that Christmas. Experiences are something worthwhile.
Re: Why I don't want stuff
#17Every time I have a birthday I am terribly worried about receiving some gift that I won't like from people who don't know me good enough but want to give me some present. Receiving a gift that I don't like and having to avoid showing that I don't really like it is worse than receiving nothing. In fact I have enough money to buy anything I want myself, so there is really nothing I would like to receive as a gift.
Are there any things you like that are temporary and experiential? For instance, I really like things like coffee, wine, movies, weekend ski trips, nice restaurants, etc. All of these things can be given as gifts, and better yet some of them can be enjoyed with the gift-giver (and spending quality time together is the best gift, really), but don't take up any space. I've had some success over time making it known that I really prefer these sorts of gifts.
Or just nice pairs of wool socks – I wear out about 5 pairs a year, which is about the right number to receive as gifts. But people might not believe you that you love getting socks :)
Re: Why I don't want stuff
#18I relate to this guy so much.
> It makes me really happy when another Christmas or birthday has passed and I didn’t receive anything. It makes me feel understood.
My sister and I have this arrangement. I tell her every Christmas that her gift (nothing) is the best one, because I don't have to figure out where to store more junk until enough time has passed that I don't feel guilty throwing it away. She's even more of a clean freak than I am — I believe she actually gets a thrill out of throwing stuff away.
If I want some object, I will buy that object myself. I don't want someone's semi-educated guess (that's most likely wrong) cluttering up my apartment. What I find particularly strange is that people consistently give me things that I explicitly tell them I don't want — they buy me stuff that they want for Christmas or that they think I "need".
The only gifts I like are the ones that have strong sentimental value — something that shows a lot of thought went into it — perhaps a handmade photo book or a good meal. For me, an object will never be as valuable as quality time spent with family.
Re: Why I don't want stuff
#19Not wanting "stuff" is a gamble that your present and future is secure and safe.
Having been homeless at one point, I've become a bit of a hoarder, because you never know when things will go south and you are one month away from being homeless (again).
Also we'll see how often you keep erasing things and starting from scratch as you get older and find that remembering things is a lot harder and takes a lot longer to rebuild.
Youth can cause foolishness.
Re: Why I don't want stuff
#20Earlier quoted context omitted.
In fact I have enough money to buy anything I want myself, so there is really nothing I would like to receive as a gift. That sounds like a closed mentality to me, you never know really, someone might just surprise you.
Give me the gift of recognizing my preference for no material gifts. EDIT: Or toilet paper. I'll eventually make use of and need TP.
So my point was that unless you know everything about life and the universe you might not know what your preferences are (and preferences change) ;)
And not all gifts are material.
But sure, there's nothing wrong in not wanting anything from someone else if that is your thing.