Paly student tells of school stress

I'm five years out from this and still remember the stress. Students are now asked to give up their present for a chance at a good future.

Yes. I did this. And then the day after graduating had an extreme realization that I had no idea why I was doing anything. I'd been on autopilot for the last 9 years. Ran myself into the ground in highschool to graduate top of the class. Killed myself in college to graduate with honors and have a job before graduating.

And then I graduated and realized that the next 40 years were in front of me. I didn't know what I wanted for myself. I had "achieved it!". I had graduated and had a job that would secure me more money than I would know what to do with, but I didn't know how to make myself happy.

I didn't know how to pace myself. I still don't. When I get an exciting project at work, I pour my god damn soul into it. And I love it. And then three months later I come up for air and realize that a word outside of my computer exists... and then I spend a week re-normalizing and getting to the point where I could walk outside and appreciate fresh air instead of thinking about where I needed to be in X + 10 minutes.

Some of it's on me. I grew up in a high-strung household with parents that are currently having anxiety problems because retirement is in the future and they don't know "what to do".

rantier part: Fuck the older generations that shit talk on millenials. I KNOW you weren't working your asses off like this in highschool and college, and I'm sick of hearing you toot your own horn because your mind is addled and you've forgotten your teen and twenties' years.

I still don't know how to truly relax and be happy. A week of vacation for me translates into about 2 days of actual relaxation. The first 5 days are spent going "wait, what the hell do I do now?"

Coming from a high school that is usually considered one of the top 10 in my random European country, I simply cannot imagine this. Granted, this country is one of the cyan countries in [1]. High school was easily the most fun time of my childhood.

I feel incredibly lucky now. I'd never want to expose my child to an environment like this.

[1] http://cdn.zmescience.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/sxn.png

I really do wonder if these students really achieve that much more than those who have a more balanced schedule.

from anyone out there feeling the pressure - i did only well enough in highschool to get into a halfway decent college (good public school), and then graduated there with a 2.0 out of guilt of wasting my parents' money. i literally had the minimum required GPA to graduate - not a coincidence. i'm not saying you should do this, but it's what happened, and those were the choices i made at that (very) young age.

i'm doing just fine. people end up all over the map and it usually has very little to do with what they did in school. i know academic overachievers who never got anywhere in life, and total slackers who found their niche a few years later. my co-founder is a drop-out, not because of grand ambitions but because he just said 'fuck this' a few months into it.

the trick is to find something to do something well (and do well in), it doesn't have to be school. it doesn't even have to be making money

(and if you follow the logic when rationalizing over-pressuring kids in school, it always goes back to money. always.)