Former Stanford dean explains why helicopter parenting is ruining a generation

Post by eitally » Sat, Oct 17, 2015, 4:14 PM UTC

veryes wrote: post #33

supercanuck wrote: post #14

You know what. Those parents got those kids into Stanford. Obviously helicopter parenting is working for them. 90% of the decisions people make are based on the environments they are in. Today's environment is extremely competitive and the margin for error is lower. Nobody wants to be the parent of the most mentally stable Starbucks Barista... Get them into Stanford, then they have the rest of their life to "fail"

Exactly so. Only a name-brand school will actually deliver career benefits commensurate with the cost of attending. If you can't get in to a Harvard or Stanford, one might do better to learn a technical trade independently than go into debt to attend a UCSD, Washington State, or god forbid a second-tier private college. Second tier schools are not worth the money they're asking in the present environment.

Post by ryandrake » Sat, Oct 17, 2015, 4:14 PM UTC

veryes wrote: post #43

m_fayer wrote: post #13

The idea that "today's youth" are more fragile than the youth of yore seems to be a growing meme. I do believe that there is a rise in mental health issues among young adults, but there are many potentially interacting causes. I haven't read the book in question, but I hope that anyone who tackles this subject addresses all the possibly relevant social phenomena before pinning it all on one root cause. Some things I…

> The tightening economic climate and increasing difficulty of staying in the middle class... > But now a majority of people of all socioeconomic brackets yearn for a middle-class existence... There is no middle class. This framing is itself toxic. There are only people who have to work for a living (i.e. the working class), and people for whom paid labor is optional due to accumulated capital of various forms (for s…

Post by ZanyProgrammer » Sat, Oct 17, 2015, 4:18 PM UTC

jon_dahl wrote: post #37

supercanuck wrote: post #14

You know what. Those parents got those kids into Stanford. Obviously helicopter parenting is working for them. 90% of the decisions people make are based on the environments they are in. Today's environment is extremely competitive and the margin for error is lower. Nobody wants to be the parent of the most mentally stable Starbucks Barista... Get them into Stanford, then they have the rest of their life to "fail"

What a false dichotomy: Stanford or life as a service worker. Both Google and YC have stopped focusing on college prestige in their hiring/acceptance, because it wasn't a particularly strong indicator of success. I would much rather send healthy kids to a state school or liberal arts college than unhealthy kids to Stanford.

Post by ZanyProgrammer » Sat, Oct 17, 2015, 4:21 PM UTC

ZanyProgrammer wrote: post #75

jon_dahl wrote: post #37

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What a false dichotomy: Stanford or life as a service worker. Both Google and YC have stopped focusing on college prestige in their hiring/acceptance, because it wasn't a particularly strong indicator of success. I would much rather send healthy kids to a state school or liberal arts college than unhealthy kids to Stanford.

Better to be a Harvard dropout (Zuckerberg) than have a CS degree from Humboldt State.

Post by lifeisstillgood » Sat, Oct 17, 2015, 4:30 PM UTC

lemmsjid wrote: post #61

supercanuck wrote: post #14

You know what. Those parents got those kids into Stanford. Obviously helicopter parenting is working for them. 90% of the decisions people make are based on the environments they are in. Today's environment is extremely competitive and the margin for error is lower. Nobody wants to be the parent of the most mentally stable Starbucks Barista... Get them into Stanford, then they have the rest of their life to "fail"

As a parent, I would a thousand times rather my child be a mentally stable barista than a questionably stable Stanford student. In fact, having recently interacted with the Standard undergraduate body, I feel quite sorry for most of them because it's such a terrible pressure cooker stress environment. My primary goal for my child is for her to be a whole person. If she can do that at Stanford, fine. If she can do tha…