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Feynman's Letter to His Wife

lettersofnote.com

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Re: Feynman's Letter to His Wife

#21

Post by mgkimsal »

pavornyoh wrote: post #15
ececconi wrote: post #9

After my dad died my freshman year of college, I wrote a letter and sealed it. It's so hard to understand that a person that was so important to you won't be there to hear everything you wanted to tell them. Since then, I've loved studying letters between friends and lovers. This is a great letter.

> It's so hard to understand that a person that was so important to you won't be there to hear everything you wanted to tell them. I agree. I know this is going to sound creepy, but in certain African countries like Ghana there is a video made of the funeral just like they do for weddings. And when you miss whoever has passed away, you get to watch the video. It doesn't bring them back but you get to see the person.

doesn't sound creepy to me at all. i wish it was done more.

Re: Feynman's Letter to His Wife

#22

Post by Steuard »

guard-of-terra wrote: post #16

I was under impression that Feynman was a pickup artist (i.e. persuading ladies to have flings). During his work on the Bomb, i.e. before 1945. That's from his books. Can you please enlighten me on the issue?

My impression, which others may correct me on, is that he started down that road while in Los Alamos: I vaguely recall that his "You just ask them?" story was in that setting, anyway. I've always had the sense that he was deeply (and monogamously) devoted to his wife until her death. After her death, well, he says in this letter that he's had multiple girlfriends but that those relationships never went anywhere; my guess would be that he's telling his wife about precisely those early flings, and what they meant to him.

But yeah, for all his brilliance and magnetism and vision, Feynman was also (eventually) pretty terrible toward women. I gaze in grateful awe and reverence at his personal contributions to human knowledge, even as I grimace in frustration and disappointment at his contributions to a culture that continues to drive too many potentially brilliant contributors away. So this letter is bittersweet to me, since it calls to mind one of the few significant areas where Feynman's life did harm to humanity rather than good. I wonder if that might have been different if his wife had lived?

Re: Feynman's Letter to His Wife

#23

Post by ceejayoz »

pavornyoh wrote: post #10

>In October of 1946, Richard wrote his late wife a heartbreaking love letter and sealed it in an envelope. It remained unopened until after his death in 1988. It is a very heartbreaking and sad. But was there instruction for it to be shared publicly? It will pain me if someone is sharing this just to further their own agenda. It seems kind of private.

We'd be missing a large portion of our civilization's history without the private writings of notable people. I can't find anything on the provenance of Feynman's letters, but I'd suspect either he or his estate willingly donated them.

Re: Feynman's Letter to His Wife

#24

Post by pavornyoh »

ceejayoz wrote: post #23
pavornyoh wrote: post #10

>In October of 1946, Richard wrote his late wife a heartbreaking love letter and sealed it in an envelope. It remained unopened until after his death in 1988. It is a very heartbreaking and sad. But was there instruction for it to be shared publicly? It will pain me if someone is sharing this just to further their own agenda. It seems kind of private.

We'd be missing a large portion of our civilization's history without the private writings of notable people. I can't find anything on the provenance of Feynman's letters, but I'd suspect either he or his estate willingly donated them.

>But I'd suspect either he or his estate willingly donated them.

Agreed. That was what I thought after my post.

Re: Feynman's Letter to His Wife

#26

Post by Moshe_Silnorin »

Steuard wrote: post #22
guard-of-terra wrote: post #16

I was under impression that Feynman was a pickup artist (i.e. persuading ladies to have flings). During his work on the Bomb, i.e. before 1945. That's from his books. Can you please enlighten me on the issue?

My impression, which others may correct me on, is that he started down that road while in Los Alamos: I vaguely recall that his "You just ask them?" story was in that setting, anyway. I've always had the sense that he was deeply (and monogamously) devoted to his wife until her death. After her death, well, he says in this letter that he's had multiple girlfriends but that those relationships never went anywhere; my g…

I know he was somewhat rakish before he married his third wife, but in what manner was he terrible to women? It takes two to tango, so his rakishness doesn't seem to imply sexism.

Re: Feynman's Letter to His Wife

#27

Post by mitchtbaum »

ececconi wrote: post #9

After my dad died my freshman year of college, I wrote a letter and sealed it. It's so hard to understand that a person that was so important to you won't be there to hear everything you wanted to tell them. Since then, I've loved studying letters between friends and lovers. This is a great letter.

> a person that was so important to you won't be there

As I understand it, we die two deaths. Once when your last breath leaves your body and next when those who remember you say your name for the last time.

By continuing to tell their stories, continuing to read their words, continuing to live, cherishing and remembering, loving, they also live... Life extends through our bodies and beyond.

Re: Feynman's Letter to His Wife

#28

Post by javawizard »

ceejayoz wrote: post #23
pavornyoh wrote: post #10

>In October of 1946, Richard wrote his late wife a heartbreaking love letter and sealed it in an envelope. It remained unopened until after his death in 1988. It is a very heartbreaking and sad. But was there instruction for it to be shared publicly? It will pain me if someone is sharing this just to further their own agenda. It seems kind of private.

We'd be missing a large portion of our civilization's history without the private writings of notable people. I can't find anything on the provenance of Feynman's letters, but I'd suspect either he or his estate willingly donated them.

(Source: The Letters of Note book - reproduced with permission of Richard Feynman's Estate.)

Re: Feynman's Letter to His Wife

#29

Post by pavornyoh »

javawizard wrote: post #28
ceejayoz wrote: post #23

Earlier quoted context omitted.

We'd be missing a large portion of our civilization's history without the private writings of notable people. I can't find anything on the provenance of Feynman's letters, but I'd suspect either he or his estate willingly donated them.

(Source: The Letters of Note book - reproduced with permission of Richard Feynman's Estate.)

@javawizard, thank you.

Re: Feynman's Letter to His Wife

#30

Post by MacsHeadroom »

guard-of-terra wrote: post #16

I was under impression that Feynman was a pickup artist (i.e. persuading ladies to have flings). During his work on the Bomb, i.e. before 1945. That's from his books. Can you please enlighten me on the issue?

This is a legitimate question. (I suspect you're being down-voted for emotional reasons.)

Feynman began work on the bomb when he was 21. He did not marry his first wife until he was 23.

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