Who else read BS terms like "self-development" and "inner work" and had to hold down the vomit? Who talks like that?
Ask HN: Have you invested in self-development and done inner work?
51–60 of 105 posts
Re: Ask HN: Have you invested in self-development and done inner work?
#52It might help to consider the common language of what I believe you're talking about. > self-development > inner work This is more commonly referred to as "self-improvement" or "self-help" (depending on if you think you're just improving yourself, or more specifically addressing something you consider to be a weakness or shortcoming.) It means developing your skills or learning new ones, and coming to a new understan…
> It means developing your skills or learning new ones, and coming to a new understanding of a topic of interest.
This feels very much like "outer" work, tacking on new skills or understanding about externalities. "Inner work", however you want to refer to it as, is more about looking within to understand your motivations, influences, blocks/hang ups/fears etc to help approach life with a more informed understanding of why you are the way you are
Re: Ask HN: Have you invested in self-development and done inner work?
#53What might be throwing off some of the commenters here: You're using language like "personal growth" and "inner work" to describe what just sounds to be professional development . Maybe professional capacity and personal identity are all tied up for you. That's certainly true for a lot of people here, including myself sometimes. But it's also maybe just an echo of working so long in an industry that tried to sell one…
Yes.
And it says something else again when one cannot even distinguish different professional approaches and moral/ethical/spiritual development.
Edit for an Orwell quote on Newspeak:
The whole literature of the past will have been destroyed. Chaucer, Shakespeare, Milton, Byron—they'll exist only in Newspeak versions, not merely changed into something different, but actually contradictory of what they used to be. Even the literature of The Party will change. Even the slogans will change. How could you have a slogan like Freedom is Slavery when the concept of freedom has been abolished?
Re: Ask HN: Have you invested in self-development and done inner work?
#54For context I studied mechanical engineering and have been a founding employee at two successful tech startups one mobile payments another a multinational dev recruitment marketplace - and a few others with mediocre success or exits over the last eleven years.
I’m currently on a career break and travelling in South America. It’s been worrying to step away from my career and out that gap in my cv but it’s something I did think about for pretty much all 11 years I was working and so I’m not going to look back when I’m 80 and wonder what if. And it’s been deeply restful and helped me to build confidence in who I am as a person, without hiding behind a job title.
Best investment I made was quitting drinking and drugs and getting an addictions counselor. I had taken myself to 0 financially and health wise. Doing the AA program and exploring that community helped me immensely- I love communities and I can take from programs what I need and leave the rest. Life changing book in this space to grok addiction IMO is The Biology of Desire. Not just opinions, actual neuroscience and field investigation combined from a PhD.
6 years later I have 3-4 years of runway and possible 20+ years runway in equity (at current valuations). I’m pretty fit and hike, surf and rock climb regularly. I also have amazing friendships and family relationships that I’m deeply grateful for.
Another great investment was getting a tennis coach who had broken tennis down into a cheat code of 7 rules after watching 1000s of hours of pros playing. I learned so much from his deep work making a simple “tennis principles for noobs” class. Just 7 lessons.
I have done therapy for two years recently which has felt more advanced and vague. In some areas of my life I’ve had fundamental changes in thinking that my therapist has really helped me to persevere with, without which I just wouldn’t have had the energy to keep working on. I’m still waiting to see how impactful it is - but it’s been quite a lot harder to navigate than quitting drugs because I don’t have a clear problem other than I am looking for a new direction in life.
I’ve read a ton of self help books and I’ve gleaned many principles to carry away with me. I only really return to a few of them: specifically Untethered Soul, The Courage to be Disliked and The Courage to be Happy - as does a close friend who is en route to billionaire.
Finally the best self improvement you can do is to spend time travelling, working with, socializing with or playing games with smart and driven people who are also kind, mindful. We learn fastest through experience and mirroring others and there’s no substitute from running alongside a master in something else - and sharing your experience together.
Re: Ask HN: Have you invested in self-development and done inner work?
#55I read the subject and thought "yes, yes I have!" .. and then I read the body of the post and am not sure I have any idea what you're asking anymore.
Re: Ask HN: Have you invested in self-development and done inner work?
#56Be careful with thinking that deep work, expanding your mind, culture, emotional and spiritual literacy, philosophical, psychological and political understanding will make you better. You will become different. Whatever measures by which you discern 'better' before, will be irrelevant, almost laughable to the person you become. And beware too that growth can itself become a preoccupation. If you have goals like be mo…
I discovered I don't enjoy programming at all and I was only ever trying to prove myself smart, because my father had hang ups about being stupid after getting brain damage.
Programming itself is horrible, now I'm stuck in a career I hate (or rather I am now aware of my prison).
I'm not sure knowing is better.
Re: Ask HN: Have you invested in self-development and done inner work?
#57Be careful with thinking that deep work, expanding your mind, culture, emotional and spiritual literacy, philosophical, psychological and political understanding will make you better. You will become different. Whatever measures by which you discern 'better' before, will be irrelevant, almost laughable to the person you become. And beware too that growth can itself become a preoccupation. If you have goals like be mo…
I discovered I don't enjoy programming at all and I was only ever trying to prove myself smart, because my father had hang ups about being stupid after getting brain damage. Programming itself is horrible, now I'm stuck in a career I hate (or rather I am now aware of my prison). I'm not sure knowing is better.
in gestalt therapy this is called being at an impasse - you are in touch with yourself enough to know that you're not happy, but not yet sure how to change your life to be happy. long term I do believe it is better to be in touch with yourself even though there may be periods of discomfort or confusion. it's better to do that than to be humming along feeding your trauma until you reach the age of 50, have a mid-life crisis and realize you've wasted so much time not in touch with yourself.
Re: Ask HN: Have you invested in self-development and done inner work?
#58Be careful with thinking that deep work, expanding your mind, culture, emotional and spiritual literacy, philosophical, psychological and political understanding will make you better. You will become different. Whatever measures by which you discern 'better' before, will be irrelevant, almost laughable to the person you become. And beware too that growth can itself become a preoccupation. If you have goals like be mo…
I discovered I don't enjoy programming at all and I was only ever trying to prove myself smart, because my father had hang ups about being stupid after getting brain damage. Programming itself is horrible, now I'm stuck in a career I hate (or rather I am now aware of my prison). I'm not sure knowing is better.
What makes you say you are imprisoned in your career as a programmer?
People career hop a lot.
Re: Ask HN: Have you invested in self-development and done inner work?
#59For professional development, I highly suggest a Kolbe A index assessment to better identify your natural energies for “doing things” (working style) and learn to harness those rather than force them to comply with external notions of “how it should be done.” I have considered mine daily for 7 years.
It seems you are actively exploring the type of job you direct your attention towards and (hopefully) derive fulfillment from, which is way more tractable than your conative personality.
Potentially more helpful categories than “problem solver” and “indie/ maker,” which are certainly not exclusive, might be these job types: producing, improving, building, or thinking (source: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/20130502173937-15454-there-ar...).
Good luck!
Re: Ask HN: Have you invested in self-development and done inner work?
#60Be careful with thinking that deep work, expanding your mind, culture, emotional and spiritual literacy, philosophical, psychological and political understanding will make you better. You will become different. Whatever measures by which you discern 'better' before, will be irrelevant, almost laughable to the person you become. And beware too that growth can itself become a preoccupation. If you have goals like be mo…
I discovered I don't enjoy programming at all and I was only ever trying to prove myself smart, because my father had hang ups about being stupid after getting brain damage. Programming itself is horrible, now I'm stuck in a career I hate (or rather I am now aware of my prison). I'm not sure knowing is better.
Why do You believe that programming is itself horrible? I do it for almost 20 years and have love and hate relationship with it, but would never say its intrinsically horrible - its just a tool (the real hell is other people as they say :))