Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Ask HN: Hackers falling in love

news.ycombinator.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

51–60 of 73 posts

Re: Ask HN: Hackers falling in love

#51

Post by jcsalterego »

patio11 wrote: post #29

I was at dinner with a young lady who is now my girlfriend a few months ago, and she asked me my plans for the next morning (Saturday). I told her that I was going to be programming (it was during the last week or two prior to AR's launch). She said: Of course, after all you are a businessman. The job comes first. I said: No. Not first. Not second, either, unless first is "all the things I love in life." I had a real…

"...and my database goes to meet the great truncate in the sky" -- I'm stealing that.

Re: Ask HN: Hackers falling in love

#52

Post by csomar »

rphlx wrote: post #25
Locke wrote: post #8

This is not so much a possibility as an inevitability. Chances are you will fall in love and it will disrupt your life whether you're starting up or doing something else entirely. If you're fortunate, you're new significant other will be a disruptive, yet motivating force. Moving you towards new heights that you had not imagined. But, it's more likely to be a struggle to balance your life's goals with your desire for…

There's a significant risk of burnout/major depression for those who stay single to work like hell through their 20s/30s. Significant others are risk reduction: they may impede a major positive outcome, but they can also prevent a very negative outcome.

Can you explain more the risk? I'm in my 20s and considering to work like hell and not going in an opposite sex relationship. I have friends, though.

Re: Ask HN: Hackers falling in love

#53

Post by csomar »

maushu wrote: post #45
fmkamchatka wrote: post #21

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> As for me, I've been with my wife for over 10 years (most of it dating), and... honestly? I think this relationship has had an adverse effect on my goals. I, kind of, think I'd be much more rich and successful had I never met my wife. Define successful?

Probably "fame", "power" and "money". Notice how happiness is not there.

I think everyone has his own definition of the word. It'll depend on what happiness to him is. If he's happy with his family, so happiness is having a family.

Re: Ask HN: Hackers falling in love

#54

Post by quan »

I had to check to make sure I didn't sleepwalk and submit this because almost the exact same thing happens to me. I quitted my job 8 months ago to travel and work on my ideas. 2 months in, I fall in love with my current girlfriend. After a few months of long distance relationship as I traveled around the world, we now live together in the most romantic city in the world, Paris.

During the day when she goes to school, I work on my project. At times when I can't stand the loneliness, I get out and just hop on a random metro to read or observe people. At night, we cook, talk, and watch movies together. I'm having the best time of my life even though the future is a little scary to think about. I hope you enjoy yours as well, best of luck to your startup.

Re: Ask HN: Hackers falling in love

#55

Post by JoachimSchipper »

patio11 wrote: post #47
singular wrote: post #46

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Though I agree that love and family come above all else, of course, I do quite dislike the whole 'it's just a job' attitude. Isn't the whole point of all this that we do what we love and are passionate about? I, for one, adore programming and would do it even if I was working as a bank clerk. Obviously there are awful days and truly crap aspects of running a business, and even when coding, as things you love aren't a…

I love my job and find a great deal of meaning in the work, but there is no level of Yay This Is The Best Job Ever that would make it more important than those other things. (It is my favorite job ever. This morning aside, I practically bounce with enthusiasm about it. I am probably spoiled for doing anything else. But if it were ripped away from me, I'd still be living a very blessed life.) I appreciate the praise,…

> folks overestimate my skill at hacking

Actually, I was under the impression that you were mainly known for BCC, which doesn't look that technically sophisticated (of course, it does require good marketing/SEO/etc, and your candid posts and expertise are very welcome).

Care to brag a little?

Re: Ask HN: Hackers falling in love

#56

Post by Platos_cave »

I think Shakespeare puts it best...

'poor and content is rich, and rich enough'

If we base our self esteem and judge our success by the work we do, then we'll always be found wanting. The ultimate goal of life is happiness in ourselves or others (which in turn often brings us happiness). While a successful start up may bring us satisfaction/money, it is ultimately only a cornerstone in our lives.

Re: Ask HN: Hackers falling in love

#57

Post by stray »

csomar wrote: post #52
rphlx wrote: post #25

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There's a significant risk of burnout/major depression for those who stay single to work like hell through their 20s/30s. Significant others are risk reduction: they may impede a major positive outcome, but they can also prevent a very negative outcome.

Can you explain more the risk? I'm in my 20s and considering to work like hell and not going in an opposite sex relationship. I have friends, though.

One day you'll realize that those opportunities with the opposite sex that you've been blowing off because you had "better" things to do... Well, those opportunities only exist in the past.

Regrets are almost always about things you didn't do. Almost never about the things you did do.

Re: Ask HN: Hackers falling in love

#58

Post by lani »

jcsalterego wrote: post #51
patio11 wrote: post #29

I was at dinner with a young lady who is now my girlfriend a few months ago, and she asked me my plans for the next morning (Saturday). I told her that I was going to be programming (it was during the last week or two prior to AR's launch). She said: Of course, after all you are a businessman. The job comes first. I said: No. Not first. Not second, either, unless first is "all the things I love in life." I had a real…

"...and my database goes to meet the great truncate in the sky" -- I'm stealing that.

me too. kindly accept my flattery : )

Re: Ask HN: Hackers falling in love

#60

Post by tptacek »

JoachimSchipper wrote: post #55
patio11 wrote: post #47

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I love my job and find a great deal of meaning in the work, but there is no level of Yay This Is The Best Job Ever that would make it more important than those other things. (It is my favorite job ever. This morning aside, I practically bounce with enthusiasm about it. I am probably spoiled for doing anything else. But if it were ripped away from me, I'd still be living a very blessed life.) I appreciate the praise,…

> folks overestimate my skill at hacking Actually, I was under the impression that you were mainly known for BCC, which doesn't look that technically sophisticated (of course, it does require good marketing/SEO/etc, and your candid posts and expertise are very welcome). Care to brag a little?

The Bingo Card Generator is not the part of BCC that is technically sophisticated.
Post reply on HN