It's not good for us to be completely alone. We are social beings, and community is part of who we are. We search for truth in relationships, politics, games, drugs, anything. We search to the end of ourselves but end up with the same emptiness and questions. The truth, wholeness, community, and love we need and seek is often in the place we're too afraid to look - the Christian church. Even if you're not religious,…
If OP finds this compelling, please consider a Quaker church to avoid the dogmatic and political baggage. Or perhaps a Unitarian church or Buddhist temple.
I am so conflicted with this stuff. You let old men tell you how to live your life, but it makes people so happy. People hate having freedom. Of course they are lying too, but those lies make people happy.
It's not good for us to be completely alone. We are social beings, and community is part of who we are. We search for truth in relationships, politics, games, drugs, anything. We search to the end of ourselves but end up with the same emptiness and questions. The truth, wholeness, community, and love we need and seek is often in the place we're too afraid to look - the Christian church. Even if you're not religious,…
The Christian church has nothing to do with truth. Sure it might offer community, but it is a community based on dogma, on faith, not truth. Why was humanity banished from the garden? For eating from the tree of knowledge. Join a Promethean cult if you can find it OP.
Only there would have never been an Enlightenment without Catholic rigor.
Some advice from my experience. - Working remotely by yourself every day sucks. Get a coworking space, shared office, work from a cafe, at least a few days a week. - Go out. Riding a bike, hiking or even bringing your dog out three times a day keeps you stimulated and makes your body moving. Go to the mountain, go to the beach, go to rivers and parks. - Join clubs that interest you. You like cinema? Join cinema a cin…
> Working remotely by yourself every day sucks
The best thing is to have the OPTION to either work at home or at the office.
Sometimes, you need the focus. But sometimes, you need to see people.
I would NOT recommend dating apps, you will most likely not find a real connection there and given the circumstances it might give you anxiety you don't need. I have had a similar path and situation lately and some things that have helped me are group activities like playing sports (I play soccer), group gym activities (I attend a strength and conditioning class) and most recently Bible study (I became friends with a…
The God thing is only temporary though. At some point you will seek Truth and the world will collapse on you.. Not only will you have an existential crisis, but your friend group will begin to shy away from you. But otherwise I basically agree. I think God is great for you in the psychological short term. Machiavelli to Dostoevsky agree.
This is my personal opinion. I think it doesn't have to be a short term fix. If you are curious enough and open minded you can find a long term relationship with God that doesn't contradict verifiable truth as long as you are willing to question collectively accepted "truths". For me, Natural theology has been one of the main foundations in my path to get closer to God. Understanding that physics stumbled upon the Spirit of God (the aether / zero point energy) and decided to look away has been super important in this journey. If you look at the recent work from physicist Nassim Haramein you'll see that Creation was not an event in a remote past after which God retired to his throne (Haramein doesn't mention God, but he explains how zero point energy sustains all matter at all times). If you agree that there is a Creator entity and you approve Haramein's theory, then zero point energy is the active force by which the Creator operates, and then creation is happening everywhere, always, and the same force that created everything is actively sustaining everything, everywhere, forever.
The God thing is only temporary though. At some point you will seek Truth and the world will collapse on you.. Not only will you have an existential crisis, but your friend group will begin to shy away from you. But otherwise I basically agree. I think God is great for you in the psychological short term. Machiavelli to Dostoevsky agree.
This statement is based on a surface level (if that) understanding of Christianity. Machiavelli and Dostoevsky aside, whose criticisms are somewhat deeper but still misguided, there are many thinkers who question the existence of God but acknowledge the benefits of a God-centered society.
To get things out of the way: yes it is hard being alone. But it is also hard to be with someone and is very hard to take care of kids and family and such. And it is waaay harder to be with wrong person. There are no easy roads in life and being single is one of the easiest. Now I’ll focus on practical advise: - gym every day. No excuses. If you don’t know what to do or lack motivation- get a personal trainer. - besi…
Those are all great things to do, but I don't think OP needs to do more things, they need to do different things. The biggest thing that jumped out was that they know they need to be with people but work remote and with a huge time shift.
My top advice would be to get an in-person job, even that means less money or moving, or just pivoting to a new industry. Even better find a job where people are your business so you're not pinning everything on socializing with co-workers. The people I know who are like this do jobs where they have to meet/find customers, coordinate people and teams, do on-site projects, etc. They are energized and fulfilled by these interactions even if the job itself isn't that important to them.
Gym has made wonders for me. Most of my friends are either on crossfit or running groups. I have joined a kickboxing gym. This helps you on multiple levels:
- It provides you a routine
- It makes you meet other people
- It makes you exercise regularly
All of the above stave off the loneliness.
Also, get a hobby where you mind focus on one thing only. Play a instrument. Draw. Solve puzzles. Jimmy Carr had a similar issue and he started to play with legos.
I would NOT recommend dating apps, you will most likely not find a real connection there and given the circumstances it might give you anxiety you don't need. I have had a similar path and situation lately and some things that have helped me are group activities like playing sports (I play soccer), group gym activities (I attend a strength and conditioning class) and most recently Bible study (I became friends with a…
Most of my friends have either joined religious groups or running teams. I never realized that, besides the philosophical and health components, there was also a social one to it.