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Ask HN: Failed interview, feeling unemployable and depressed – what do I do?

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Re: Ask HN: Failed interview, feeling unemployable and depressed – what do I do?

#241

Post by branchless »

ImTalking wrote: post #229
branchless wrote: post #194

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sorry it's just funny. 99% of people reading your post telling the other poster not to feel inadequate would feel inadequate. Reminds me of the film Meet the Parents where Owen Wilson is the ex boyfriend who trades commodities and does carpentry in his spare time! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ETC82KEplac Apologies, but I did just find it funny. You can't help being good at things and nice enough to post encouragin…

Yeah, I can see your point. I am on the autism spectrum somewhere and I am very fortunate that I do not have the crippling anxiety and self-doubt that the OP and others are grappling with. I quit IBM after 6 years because I wanted to have my own business and had only a couple of business meetings lined-up (it failed), I built a software business in mortgage processing only due to some conversation I had with a mortga…

I think it also comes with age. I'm nearly 40 and frankly I don't care what others think about my programming prowess, for better or worse.

Agree on your advice to your kids. Was telling mine something similar over dinner tonight, though my eldest is only 7.

I think the biggest liberation is not keeping up with others. But it's also generational as well. This guy is likely under 40, has a big mortgage etc. The game has (sadly) changed now in that failure is not an option due to crippling debt. At 56 you won't have had to face the same challenges the next generation face. It truly does suck. I think this is crippling productivity as people just cannot take risks as easily any more unless they are fresh out of school.

Sigh! Anyhow have a good weekend and I agree we should not let the above stop us no matter how tough it gets!

Re: Ask HN: Failed interview, feeling unemployable and depressed – what do I do?

#242

Post by ironmagma »

I don't have much advice for feeling unemployable, but I can provide a helping hand with feelings of depression. Right before I moved to the Bay Area I was feeling the worst I'd felt in my life with loss of love and passion, as well as desire for life, and I know exactly how that can feel. Please drop me a line at philip at starryexpanse.com. I hope I can help you through this by telling you the things that helped me to make it through.

Re: Ask HN: Failed interview, feeling unemployable and depressed – what do I do?

#243

Post by syngrog66 »

design software? code it? document it? release it? on GitHub? blog about it, screencast etc? You don't need anybody else's permission to do these things. Fuck puzzles. Fuck challenges. Make things. Solve actual problems. Imagine. And ship. Then iterate.

Re: Ask HN: Failed interview, feeling unemployable and depressed – what do I do?

#244

Post by deathbysw123 »

I'm sorry I took this long to come back here, but I decided to take some time to calm down and think about things before writing any replies or follow ups.

I'm immensely grateful for everyone's support here! :) I probably don't know any of you and yet it feels amazing that so many people care.

I've figured that my work environment is the biggest issue in my life right now. The interview experience was just the trigger to my reaction. But I've realized that I work in an environment where there's as much of a daily dick swinging contest as in those interviews, so I didn't just feel inadequate for failing an interview, I feel inadequate daily when I let the nerd lording get to me.

I see two options: either quit or try to be stronger where I am right now. I decided to give the second option a try before quitting. For the past few days I've been more vocal and trying to stand my ground a little more. It's going to be hard, but I want to give this a shot.

And to everyone who recommended that I get professional help: yes, this is past due. Working on it!

Re: Ask HN: Failed interview, feeling unemployable and depressed – what do I do?

#245

Post by FT_intern »

cachemiss wrote: post #63
akhilcacharya wrote: post #42

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> It's -stupidly- rare for people to 'figure out' the question in an interview ...really? I've heard of people failing interviews at the Big4 because they solved the problem, but did it sub optimally.

Generally people are looking for a preferred solution, solving the problem, but not in the preferred way is usually not enough. This isn't good or anything (though, sometimes there's the really obvious super slow way, and its appropriate to ask for something better), its just the way it is. This is especially pronounced with junior interviewers, I've gotten dinged for missing capitalization on one variable in an othe…

>Most interviewers at these company, especially those with little empathy or training, are looking to rule you out, and are looking to find a problem with whatever it is you do

I disagree with this. Although technically there is an infinite list of wrong moves, interviewers have a list of "right" moves that people do that they keep track of that demonstrate the interviewee's abilitie

Re: Ask HN: Failed interview, feeling unemployable and depressed – what do I do?

#246

Post by [deleted] »

cachemiss wrote: post #63
akhilcacharya wrote: post #42

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> It's -stupidly- rare for people to 'figure out' the question in an interview ...really? I've heard of people failing interviews at the Big4 because they solved the problem, but did it sub optimally.

Generally people are looking for a preferred solution, solving the problem, but not in the preferred way is usually not enough. This isn't good or anything (though, sometimes there's the really obvious super slow way, and its appropriate to ask for something better), its just the way it is. This is especially pronounced with junior interviewers, I've gotten dinged for missing capitalization on one variable in an othe…

[deleted]

Re: Ask HN: Failed interview, feeling unemployable and depressed – what do I do?

#247

Post by averagegooglers »

googthrow500 wrote: post #47

Just want to chime in and say you're not alone. I am miserable at Google and have found the biggest lie Google recruiters tell people is that internal transfers are easy. I got "exceeds expectations" and still find the transfer process to be mountains of red tape. And for as much as everyone makes it seem like you can walk into a new job, my few attempts at exploring have run into people getting hung up on "So why do…

How hard is it? Do you also know the process of rejoining Google after leaving (it seems like you're considering that option)?

I'm also discontent with my team, although I can tough it out until the 1.5 year mark which is apparently when transfers are supposed to be easy from what recruiters told me.

Re: Ask HN: Failed interview, feeling unemployable and depressed – what do I do?

#248

Post by shiinee »

averagegooglers wrote: post #247
googthrow500 wrote: post #47

Just want to chime in and say you're not alone. I am miserable at Google and have found the biggest lie Google recruiters tell people is that internal transfers are easy. I got "exceeds expectations" and still find the transfer process to be mountains of red tape. And for as much as everyone makes it seem like you can walk into a new job, my few attempts at exploring have run into people getting hung up on "So why do…

How hard is it? Do you also know the process of rejoining Google after leaving (it seems like you're considering that option)? I'm also discontent with my team, although I can tough it out until the 1.5 year mark which is apparently when transfers are supposed to be easy from what recruiters told me.

Hey, I'm a Googler who left and came back. If either of you (PP or GP) want to ask me about it in a less public forum, you can find me by searching teams for my 100% real job title, "Super Ridiculous Engineer".
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