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Ask HN: What's Your Biggest Regret?

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Re: Ask HN: What's Your Biggest Regret?

#211

Post by deadcore »

I'll give this a go as it took me far too long to work this out - and some might disagree with me.

Taking every single ounce of advice people give to you.

I've found that everyone has a pathway in life, a way they are able to unlock and achieve their full potential. I found that what works for one person, may not always work for another. When I was starting out I would listen without question to anyones advice, peers, managers, business owners and attempt to shape myself to accommodate that advice & guidance - to only find that it would stifle me. Everyone has an opinion on how to do things best, but sometimes you just need to believe in yourself and your own capabilities.

Now I'm not saying don't ever listen to anyone, just be selective on who you listen to.

Re: Ask HN: What's Your Biggest Regret?

#212

Post by matwood »

scandox wrote: post #148
matwood wrote: post #95

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Steve Jobs turned the ideas in that quote into a commencement speech after his cancer diagnosis. It concludes with: Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is tru…

It is handy when your heart is in something financially remunerative though. My heart tends toward the gutter. Not complaining though.

I knew I would get your comment and almost left out the last line because of it. But, I wanted to keep the quote complete. It still works even if you leave out follow your heart.

Re: Ask HN: What's Your Biggest Regret?

#213

Post by andrejandre »

DontchaKnowit wrote: post #179

Always had an obsessive personality. Raised Christian. Always had a bent for pushing boundaries. Got interested in the nuerochemistry of psychoactive substances. Got very involved in educating myself about drug usage, until I was finally comfortable trying them. Queue ~6 years of polysubstance abuse, wasted money, and fake ass friends. Did everything under the sun I could get my hands on. I think the list of unique d…

You will find your people. You looked underneath a stone not many people turn over.

I don't have such a drug story, but I do feel like an alien often. I tend to only be capable of socializing with people who deeply align with my goals and ambitions. Those being: calisthenics, software, fitness, coding, cooking, being organized, etc.

I don't give myself a hard time for seeking a 'strata' of people, etc.

Be selective. Find the people only you want. Be an alien.

Re: Ask HN: What's Your Biggest Regret?

#214

Post by the_only_law »

analog31 wrote: post #162

Kinda trivial but: Neglecting my upper body strength when I was much younger. Just to have more of a "reserve" against injury and for when I get older and start losing it naturally. This is something I've mentioned to both of my kids.

I really wish I had just got in shape when I was a teenager. I was a lot more athletic then, and I’m not even very old now, but I’ve managed to fuck to my knee and various bad habits and choices have butchered my lung capacity.

Re: Ask HN: What's Your Biggest Regret?

#216

Post by shirinbajaj »

bheadmaster wrote: post #140

I don't really "believe" in regret. At each and every point in my life, I was working with the information I had at my disposal, each information having its own "weight" in my mind. Every mistake I've made has brought some information in my mind that wouldn't have been brought otherwise. Fantasies of "changing the past" are seductive, but ultimately pointless. The only way I could justify having regrets, is reminding…

No post body was provided.

Re: Ask HN: What's Your Biggest Regret?

#219

Post by wollsmoth »

DontchaKnowit wrote: post #179

Always had an obsessive personality. Raised Christian. Always had a bent for pushing boundaries. Got interested in the nuerochemistry of psychoactive substances. Got very involved in educating myself about drug usage, until I was finally comfortable trying them. Queue ~6 years of polysubstance abuse, wasted money, and fake ass friends. Did everything under the sun I could get my hands on. I think the list of unique d…

Yeah, similar but not so bad. Spent a lot of nights and weekends with drinks and friends. Now I'm finding we're not so well connected if we're not all drunk and you can't keep on like that too long without great cost. Too many of my friends have slipped into alcoholism or major health issues.

I'm in a city so there are options, but figuring out the social world without booze is a lot.

Re: Ask HN: What's Your Biggest Regret?

#220

Post by wollsmoth »

rippercushions wrote: post #182
CalRobert wrote: post #174

Buying a thatched cottage in Ireland. It's very pretty, and it checks all the boxes (bike ride from train station), etc. but Ireland's insanely strict protection rules and ridiculous insurance payouts have resulted in every insurer of thatched buildings leaving the country. Additionally, when I applied for permission to build a separate house on the land (it's a few acres) the heritage officer insisted we only build…

That creates a remarkable set of perverse incentives akin to what's seen in Australia, where restoring old houses properly is so expensive that they tend to be left to rot and/or mysteriously catch fire instead. Is the issue widely known?

yeah, gosh, it'd be a shame if the house were damaged such that it lost its heritage status.
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