Please prioritize psychological well-being over everything else. Please have a therapist for regular counseling. As a practicing Buddhist I can tell you of two excellent teachers in Canada, Yuttadhammo Bhikkhu near Toronto and Ajahn Sona in British Columbia. Check out their videos on YouTube. Do remember that there are a lot of people, who you may not know, but still they care for you. Sending you lots of good wishes from across the border. Take care dear friend!
Ask HN: I think I’ve burnt out. What should I do?
131–140 of 172 posts
Re: Ask HN: I think I’ve burnt out. What should I do?
#132Earlier quoted context omitted.
I strongly, but politely, disagree because I took a year off and completely retooled my career. You must exercise, eat healthy, keep a schedule, and eliminate all distractions. Live somewhere cheap and focus on career and personal development. Don’t look for a job until 10 months of intense studying and development. Only do this if you are truly committed to changing the direction of your career. This was probably th…
Thank you for this comment! I am actually in a similar situation right now, took a break from college and working on myself, learning about programming and trying hard to improve my english. Sometimes it just kinda feels pointless, like why am i even doing this and theres a plethora of self doubt and self hatred. But your comment kinda made me feel a bit more motivated, so thank you for that :)
Yup, same here. 10 years ago I left my job, threw away my crap, went off to Korea for a year to teach English. Brought some math and physics books I'd always wanted to understand, learned Korean, and bought a cheap bicycle and biked around southeast Asia after the year was over. After a few months of this I started hitting up old coworkers for job references, with the fallback of another English teaching stint (managed to find a new coding job). Some days were hard but I wouldn't give up that experience for anything.
Re: Ask HN: I think I’ve burnt out. What should I do?
#133Try vaping high cbd hemp flower daily after work for about two months. You can mix it with thc flower to achieve a full spectrum entourage effect. Relax. Listen to music. Let your mind wander and take you places.
Get off the amphetamines, if you're on any. Modafinil, Ritalin, whatever.
Re: Ask HN: I think I’ve burnt out. What should I do?
#134I am not a therapist, so my opinion is not medical advice, but this what I would do: take a few vacations of 2-3 weeks each and travel on the continent; nothing fancy, just a disconnect. I have a few friends that I take for a very long bike ride, if you have anyone that can join you it's a great thing to do; the purpose is to disconnect, so the destination does not matter, just the activity. The second activity: get…
This all sounds great, except what do I do with my wife and kids during this time? Vacation is not vacation for those of us with a young family - it's actually more work than being at work is, sometimes. Good work, rewarding, but also severely draining sometimes.
You have a different situation than the person who asked the question, assuming the same answer apply to everyone is a mistake.
How it worked for me in a similar situation: parents. I live in a country where families are not completely destroyed, so we had 2 pairs of parents to help with the kids. Taking the wife in vacation is doable and effective.
Re: Ask HN: I think I’ve burnt out. What should I do?
#135Earlier quoted context omitted.
I would specifically advise against developing a tech related hobby. In my experience, it just accelerates burn out. Something that forces you to be outside/unplugged is ideal imo.
Well, what's "tech" in my case, photography provided a hell of lot of things my nerdy side found interesting, optics formulas, sensors, films, whatever -- that's still 'tech'. You can't hide from tech for very long. Just curtain it carefully. Picking up an arduino and 'waste' a couple of days making LED blink can be fantastically relaxing too.
Oh no I just meant it as a general comment, adding to the "develop a hobby" suggestion. I wouldn't put photography into a tech bucket.
I just think it's inevitable to hit burnout if you spend all day at work staring at screens and come home to relax by staring at screens. Or at least a way to burn out your eyes.
Re: Ask HN: I think I’ve burnt out. What should I do?
#136If you’re looking for someone to talk to about how you’ve been feeling and how better to cope, I highly recommend texting crisistextline.org
(I’m a volunteer counselor there.) The conversation is purely over text, with someone you listens non-judgementally and can offer coping strategies.
Re: Ask HN: I think I’ve burnt out. What should I do?
#137Whatever you have to, mate. Break whatever cycles you feel are detrimental to your emotional/physical/spiritual wellbeing and pave a new path for yourself. If you have money saved up, or can sell a bunch of stuff and live frugally, get out of your normal space so that you can gather new perspective on life. A few ideas, as I know creativity can be blocked when you're feeling the weight of everything. Feel free to ign…
> Learn a new physically engaging skill. Most importantly, breathe.
I learned diving. It was great - taught me how to slow down entirely - you need to be 100% "immersed" in what you are doing - you have to breathe consistently and calmly
I loved it and it helped me heaps (in addition to doing all the other good things mentioned above!)
Re: Ask HN: I think I’ve burnt out. What should I do?
#138First, I am very sorry, especially for the loss of your mother.
The answer I am about to suggest works wonders for me, and for lots of people I know, but is not for everybody. My answer is to suggest you seek out relief through religion. (Choose wisely, meaning investigate non-radical variants that center on improving world conditions.) Religion is known to have many benefits, including mental health benefits.
Good luck to you.
Re: Ask HN: I think I’ve burnt out. What should I do?
#139“... two separate cases of sexual assault, and the passing of my mother.”
First of all I’m very sorry!!! I think that you could benefit a lot from a professional to help you heal from this. If you are up to it perhaps pursuing legal action to get justice might help.
When I lost my dad I got very numb and it was only a bunch of time and counseling that helped me recognize that and reconnect.
Re: Ask HN: I think I’ve burnt out. What should I do?
#140Watch Office Space, and learn the lessons from there. It's just a job. You might actually be better at it if you don't give as much of a fuck - caring too much tends to lead you to taking on too much work, and that can only end in disappointment and burnout for everyone involved.
It's important to have some sort of a life outside of work, and to _prioritize it_.