Ask HN: How to overcome fear of flying?

That is, in fact, a facet of ACT. Do things to expose yourself to tiny amounts of fear an anxiety, then progressively increasing that exposure that until you either don't feel them or don't perceive them as bad.

Put another way; you become comfortable with being uncomfortable. Believe it or not, you can actually enjoy those feelings.

It's a bit of a shortcut, but diazepam or xanax or something similar really works wonders. It doesn't knock you out or anything, it really just takes away the anxiety.

I used to be so afraid of flying that I would cry and hold strangers hands on planes without any prompting. It was out of control. It started really slowly though. I was able to fly when I was younger, but nervousness started to take over and eventually, like you, a bout of turbulence made me even more anxious.

I told my doctor about my week long anxiety before flying and how I would cry on strangers randomly throughout a flight convinced they were the last person I would ever meet. He prescribed Xanax and suggested therapy. The drugs helped me keep to myself, but what helped the most was watching planes take off and land at SFO.

I was flying to SFO for work and staying at a hotel nearby, so I would sit and watch planes take off and land. Every time I heard the engines speed up for take off, I would get nervous (and feel myself getting nervous writing this), but after a while, it got to where I could distract myself from the fear when on the plane.

When I wasn't in SFO, I would listen to air traffic control (smooth calming pilot voices!) on my ham radio as prep for an upcoming flight.

Also therapy is amazing for helping me work through various other anxieties.

Good luck! Its not impossible and you are on the right track through looking into statistics and trying to give yourself something concrete and rational to think about.

Great question. I used to be scared of flying, despite doing alot of it.

A few things cured me. I watched alot of aircraft carrier landings, especially in bad weather. Even in those conditions the plans land nearly every time. I realised that in contrast, passengers jets are nothing more than highly reliable, safe slow buses.

Also I came to realise something about courage. Fear of flying is being scared about something that has not yet happened. So I simply decided I would be scared when a plane was actually crashing. That's courage - not being overly concerned about something until it actually happens.

The other thing is to understand that the physics of plans is really on your side, especially during landing - these things are incredibly stable as they land and the design of the plane is forcing it down during landing .... it's really highly unlikely something will go wrong.

And finally I thought about the statistics - you are literally more likely to die in the car ride to the airport than on the plane.

I go on live-leak once every few months and watch questionable material. Things like OSHA incidents, fatal freak accidents, war,gopro adrenaline videos, etc. I find I need to remind myself that I am lucky and grateful for the life I have, and to take safety seriously. I also do this to build willpower and fearlessness in many things, because I would have seen it already once. So when something imminent does happen I have natural instincts to do whats needed

When you realize you have a higher chance of dying in a car accident than a flight things are put in perspective. You won't have a choice in either case anyhow, shit just happens. Accept that some things are out of your control and you take a gamble at everything you do in life. Not everyone wins.