The year I didn't survive
bessstillman.substack.com
The year I didn't survive
1–10 of 276 posts
Re: The year I didn't survive
#2I know it wasn't the intention of the author in the slightest, but I feel so small and incapable after reading that piece. Good luck bess.
Re: The year I didn't survive
#3Very sad. In case you didn't open the link yet, this is from the widow of Jake Seliger, who was very active on HN: https://news.ycombinator.com/threads?id=jseliger. He died a few months ago.
Grieving while being a new mom must be brutal.
Re: The year I didn't survive
#4Very sad. In case you didn't open the link yet, this is from the widow of Jake Seliger, who was very active on HN: https://news.ycombinator.com/threads?id=jseliger . He died a few months ago. Grieving while being a new mom must be brutal.
Checked his profile. His last comment was an archive.ph link to bypass a paywall. If that's not a great HN legacy, I don't know what is.
Re: The year I didn't survive
#5Oh man, I’m really sorry to see Jake passed. I read their updates every few months when they’d land on HN; it made me sad to see the past tense of “dying” this time. Rest in peace
Re: The year I didn't survive
#6Very sad. In case you didn't open the link yet, this is from the widow of Jake Seliger, who was very active on HN: https://news.ycombinator.com/threads?id=jseliger . He died a few months ago. Grieving while being a new mom must be brutal.
Checked his profile. His last comment was an archive.ph link to bypass a paywall. If that's not a great HN legacy, I don't know what is.
It was on the day he died, too.
Re: The year I didn't survive
#7Her words lived.
Re: The year I didn't survive
#8Remember this tragedy and the millions like it when you read the news today.
Trump and Musk are killing the very research that has a shot at saving lives and preventing these families from being torn apart. NIH and NSF are being gutted. Universities won't be able to do bio research at all under the new 15% cap on NIH indirect costs.
These decisions which save no appreciable amount of money have a real impact on people whose children must now grow up without them. As a new father this is really heartbreaking.
Re: The year I didn't survive
#9That terrible brutal grief is what death leaves us every time. I remember Jake's posts. He fought, and he all of us to fight.
Re: The year I didn't survive
#10It's weird how a series of big things happening in a short period of time changes who you are as a person, and not always for the better.
When I failed to stop an acquaintance from killing himself a few years ago [1], it really fucked me up. I barely knew the guy, but I couldn't stop myself from feeling guilty over it, and I still have nightmares about it.
It led to a severe funk of depression that I still haven't gotten over, and it's led to poor sleep, poor performance at work, an increased irritability towards pretty much everyone, and I'm not completely convinced that that will ever stop.
I've seen therapists, taken various medications for depression and PTSD, trauma dumped onto pretty much anyone who will listen, and I think I'm a worse person now than I was in 2021.
I guess the likelihood of an event like this happening approaches 1 as you get older, but it doesn't mean it's not terrible.
[1] Written in some detail here https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=29185822