Live data from Hacker News

How Inuit Parents Teach Kids To Control Their Anger (2019)

npr.org

1–10 of 161 posts

Re: How Inuit Parents Teach Kids To Control Their Anger (2019)

#3
I'm with the Inuit and Jedi on this one: anger is pretty useless[0], and if you must[1] take revenge, that's best served cold.

Sometimes I wonder if the typical Hollywood W-plot, in which the hero's best friend/significant relation is shown partying/getting the girl/otherwise living well at the top of the middle ∧ then killed by the villain at the bottom of the right ∨, after which the hero gets angry and wins the day, has been deliberately chosen to teach the proles exactly the wrong lesson, but then I remember to never ascribe to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

Speaking of storytelling, isn't a corollary of The Iliad that if Achilles had not been —or at least not stayed— angry, a few dozen ships worth of Achaeans would not have died (as described by Homer with lines worthy of 1975's Rollerball) in gruesome ways?

[0] is it useful for creatures that only have a limbic system? not only do we have a neocortex, but it's much more useful in these cases

[1] often simply continuing to live well oneself is far better than any revenge

Re: How Inuit Parents Teach Kids To Control Their Anger (2019)

#5
This seems particularly useful to know about especially as organizational change across so many workplaces has created tension.

The only part I wonder about is the "playful" storytelling. There are definitely better ways to communicate danger to a child than the boogeyman. It will take a lot more effort than a silly story, but you're trying to build up their mind after all.

Re: How Inuit Parents Teach Kids To Control Their Anger (2019)

#6
post #4

I’m not sure lying to your kids about sea monsters to the point that your children are so petrified of the water they don’t go near it is quite as benign as they believe.

Looks like adults ain’t scared of the ocean too much to fish.

Disciplining in harsh ways ain’t without downsides. Nor not disciplining at all. Pick your preferred poison?

Re: How Inuit Parents Teach Kids To Control Their Anger (2019)

#7

I'm with the Inuit and Jedi on this one: anger is pretty useless[0], and if you must[1] take revenge, that's best served cold. Sometimes I wonder if the typical Hollywood W-plot, in which the hero's best friend/significant relation is shown partying/getting the girl/otherwise living well at the top of the middle ∧ then killed by the villain at the bottom of the right ∨, after which the hero gets angry and wins the da…

The problem is that there's about equal amounts of malice as stupidity in the world, so you never really know why. Assuming stupidity by default doesn't always make you feel better and may still lead to an emotional reaction you don't want to have.

The better solution is to not care why, and do what ya gotta do. Usually that's creating distance from the source of problems and you and your work.

Re: How Inuit Parents Teach Kids To Control Their Anger (2019)

#8
post #4

I’m not sure lying to your kids about sea monsters to the point that your children are so petrified of the water they don’t go near it is quite as benign as they believe.

Also, unaddressed: when they get old enough to realize the story is fake, are they more likely to do something stupid then, because they don’t understand the actual reasoning?

Re: How Inuit Parents Teach Kids To Control Their Anger (2019)

#9
post #4

I’m not sure lying to your kids about sea monsters to the point that your children are so petrified of the water they don’t go near it is quite as benign as they believe.

to be fair to the concept, it's a pretty benign sea monster (as far as sea monsters go..)

>Jaw says Inuit parents take a pre-emptive approach and tell kids a special story about what's inside the water. "It's the sea monster," Jaw says, with a giant pouch on its back just for little kids.

>"If a child walks too close to the water, the monster will put you in his pouch, drag you down to the ocean and adopt you out to another family," Jaw says.

i'd much rather encounter that monster than any of the sea-yokai.

Re: How Inuit Parents Teach Kids To Control Their Anger (2019)

#10
post #4

I’m not sure lying to your kids about sea monsters to the point that your children are so petrified of the water they don’t go near it is quite as benign as they believe.

Also, unaddressed: when they get old enough to realize the story is fake, are they more likely to do something stupid then, because they don’t understand the actual reasoning?

Yeah that's exactly the problem with the boogeyman. They inevitably enter a rebellious phase that could be mostly avoided if you maintained trust and communication.

Easier said than done, but you need to keep things simple and direct. To be blunt about it, most parents aren't mentally mature enough to have kids.

Post reply on HN