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Ask HN: Solo founders, how do you overcome isolation?

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Ask HN: Solo founders, how do you overcome isolation?

#1

Post by alessiosantocs »

Hi all, I've been working on my own for some years now on a saas business now generating around 5k/MRR.

I've enjoyed being able to work by myself in the past few years and didn't really feel the need of a co-founder or a pal in my team with whom to talk about the business you know (I have a couple of contractors on the team).

Since the pandemic hit, I've started feeling more and more isolated and I've realized how I'm actually needing someone to talk to on a daily basis about the struggle of the business, discuss ideas about the product and so on...

How do you go about finding someone like that in a moment like this?

Re: Ask HN: Solo founders, how do you overcome isolation?

#3

Post by segmondy »

Just ask if someone with similar interest wants to buddy up and chat from time to time. Feel free to ping me, I up for occasional chat once or twice a week about running your own tech biz. You can also checkout indiehackers.com, you might find more solo tech entrepreneurs on there.

Re: Ask HN: Solo founders, how do you overcome isolation?

#5

Post by santa_boy »

I've been in a similar situation. Most of the aggravation is because of doing it all myself and not being a particularly social network communication type.

I've hired a few and improving on social outreach too. I think it is helpful because engagement creates a community by itself. And, delegation is extremely rewarding when done reasonably right.

Both of them inherently create a discussion board and a decent platform to express thoughts.

Re: Ask HN: Solo founders, how do you overcome isolation?

#6

Post by RemingtonLak »

Hard problem. If someone else out there is in the same boat. How would that person find you?

If you can answer that, then you've found your answer and on your way of solving one of the biggest issue straight men are facing.

I'm in the same boat as you thus scoping out HN right now ;-), but also do Reddit and Indiehackers.com. I'm finding it's harder to find someone to befriend than it was finding my soulmate! Seriously.

Other places due to my interests are arduino/ESP8266/IoT forums. As for late, I'm been active on Hubitat forums since I'm trying to hobble together a worthy home automation and security. Lot of great people but hard to "connect" as a friend in forums. They are there to find solutions, not friends or at least I think they are?

It's almost as if one needs to "invent" match.com for for friends ;-) FriendFinder site start with that mantra where the founder started out looking for golf buddies only to find out most men that are looking are looking for one thing....

Incidentally, great podcast on this subject: https://www.npr.org/2018/03/19/594719471/guys-we-have-a-prob...

I've been looking long and hard to try to find a solution to this problem. Women simply do NOT have this problem. Only men and it's becoming an epidemic of sorts. My father died "lonely", while my mother thrived with friends and same as for my in-law's. Men just do not want to talk, approach or converse with other men unless forced to. Stigma men seem to unwilling to let go.

Sorry, rambling since I got tired of coding and was looking for a break by reading HN ;-)

Re: Ask HN: Solo founders, how do you overcome isolation?

#7

Post by RemingtonLak »

greazy wrote: post #4
buffaloo wrote: post #2

If part of your question relates to loneliness, get a dog.

That's terrible advice.

Actually if you think about it, it may not be. He will need to take it for a walk and you never know. He may run into someone else walking their dog. Now they have a common activity. Actually it's a great idea. Take the dog out to different neighborhoods to walk it.

It seems you simply need something in common to start a conversation. You never know where that might lead to. The funny part is, while his dog is sniffing/scoping out the other person's dog. You have nothing better to do except to why not strike up a conversation... "say..does your pooch always sniff like that?"

Re: Ask HN: Solo founders, how do you overcome isolation?

#8

Post by alessiosantocs »

buffaloo wrote: post #2

If part of your question relates to loneliness, get a dog.

lol I haven't added any context around my life in my post. I am very lucky as I do have a lot of company in the house: my wife and 4 little children and we live in Bali :) Still, I feel isolated in my work and I find it really hard to make friends that I can also talk to about anything you know.

Re: Ask HN: Solo founders, how do you overcome isolation?

#9

Post by alessiosantocs »

RemingtonLak wrote: post #6

Hard problem. If someone else out there is in the same boat. How would that person find you? If you can answer that, then you've found your answer and on your way of solving one of the biggest issue straight men are facing. I'm in the same boat as you thus scoping out HN right now ;-), but also do Reddit and Indiehackers.com. I'm finding it's harder to find someone to befriend than it was finding my soulmate! Serious…

Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

This is an interesting point of view that I haven't thought about before. I agree with the fact that men are generally less inclined to speak openly about their feelings, worries and such.

I realized I haven't shared my gender in my post so it's interesting to see how other people relate to my question.

Does anyone know any groups or communities we lonely guys could join to find like-minded solopreneurs to support each other and create meaningful relationships?

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