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People that think you’re an asshole

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Re: People that think you’re an asshole

#6

When you're twenty, you worry about what people think. When you're forty, you don't care what people think. And when you're sixty, you realize that nobody was thinking about you in the first place.

I really do not find that a man starts to care less about what others think of him as he ages at all.

Rather, I find it is that adults rule the conformance games that adolescents and teenagers play are “silly” all the while partaking in their own, which are of course not silly, but rather how one should conform and teenagers are wrong for not conforming to those ideals.

Consider that the parent who berates his child for smoking marihuana to be part of his clique will the next day consume alcohol at his office party, as to not be left out.

Re: People that think you’re an asshole

#7

When you're twenty, you worry about what people think. When you're forty, you don't care what people think. And when you're sixty, you realize that nobody was thinking about you in the first place.

I really do not find that a man starts to care less about what others think of him as he ages at all. Rather, I find it is that adults rule the conformance games that adolescents and teenagers play are “silly” all the while partaking in their own, which are of course not silly, but rather how one should conform and teenagers are wrong for not conforming to those ideals. Consider that the parent who berates his child…

Which connects up, in the sense that you stereotypically care less in a way that you consciously notice because you gradually internalize the culture strongly enough for it to just feel like “the way things are”, and then in old age you impute upon yourself (and/or society imputes upon you) a position of sufficient immunity that you can keep saying “the kids are wrong” even as they're about to displace you.

Re: People that think you’re an asshole

#8
post #4

Sometimes the people who think you're an asshole are your friends. You turned into an asshole after they became your friends. It's time to change.

And sometimes you were one all along, and you didn't know, and they also didn't know enough to recognize the warning signs until they'd already gotten entangled with you. Now you're about to gradually lose everyone as they realize how much of a drain you're being and quietly shut you out.

Re: People that think you’re an asshole

#9
It is good to not care what people think about you.

And bad to act like an asshole.

If you act nice, and don't care what people think about you, you can't lose, and most people will like to have you around.

Assholes might still annoy you, but when that happens, your friends will help you to feel better.

Re: People that think you’re an asshole

#10
post #4

Sometimes the people who think you're an asshole are your friends. You turned into an asshole after they became your friends. It's time to change.

I don't know how common this sentiment is but I definitely felt it with a previous group of friends. The behaviors you internalize just to be able to fit in with what seems like the only people that will ever like you really have no limit at all, and can lead you to do things you never thought you would.

Specifically, I strictly remember bullying this poor kid relentlessly during middle school because he (I kid you not) had lips so red he looked like he wore lipstick. You can imagine my shock when I later found out I was bisexual and that wearing lipstick is awesome actually.

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