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The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

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Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#2
I find myself doing this too. My kids put such a large constraint on my free time that between work and family I only have 3 hours or less per day to do everything, so I am tempted to sacrifice sleep to gain a bit more book reading, side project, or video game time.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#3
I'm also doing this, big time.. Between a full-time job, building a new home, renovating another and having a wife and kid, there's not any "me" time until past wife+kids bedtime.

I only get energy from being alone and doing stuff on my computer, so I trade sleep for time every night.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#4
post #3

I'm also doing this, big time.. Between a full-time job, building a new home, renovating another and having a wife and kid, there's not any "me" time until past wife+kids bedtime. I only get energy from being alone and doing stuff on my computer, so I trade sleep for time every night.

Nothing beats having some time alone to work on your personal projects. Especially after wasting a full day working with enterprise code that was written by an offshore company six years ago.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#5
No mention of how to get out of this unhealthy habit.

I'm struggling with this myself. Some of my conclusions so far:

* When I am sleep-deprived I am less productive. So I spend more time doing "work". Then I have less time for everything else I want to do (family, cooking, sport). So I take more time away from sleep. And the cycle repeats. Sleep deprivation is self-perpetuating.

* What I do at night, when I am exhausted, in 2 hours can be done in the morning in half an hour.

* I get angrier and negative much more easily when I am sleep deprived.

For my particular case: limit the time dedicated to "work" and do the other things in the time it is usually dedicated to it. Stay away from screens past 11. Listen to ebooks for falling asleep. Use the good sleep energy to finish work stuff earlier, do more exercise, etc. Break out of the vicious cycle and start a virtuous one.

I still fail at doing it from time to time. I think this must feel similar to what relapsing alcoholics feel. I try to not be too hard on myself and keep trying.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#7
I follow a similar pattern, but a major component for me is anhedonia / depression. I don't have anything in my life that is fulfilling or exciting or fun. I delay going to bed, both hoping to suddenly feel that spark of excitement for something, and feeling reluctant to go to bed in this unsatisified state.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#9
It’s interesting the use of the aggressive language “revenge“ And “retaliatory” which seems to have a negative charge. I wonder if it is due to the culture of China, its communist leaning, or something deeper that looks at personal leisure time as a bad thing.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#10
post #6

I bet this is pretty common among parents during the pandemic. Between homeschooling/work, the only time a lot of have is late at night.

And during this time slot for oneself, somethings can't be done as it was done earlier. Physical stores are closed, sometimes there isn't enough space to watch your TV in the desired volume, you can't go to your yard and do your wood-working hobby.

Even when you find/trade your time, it's not the same time.

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