The biology of dads
aeon.co
The biology of dads
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Re: The biology of dads
#2Any ideas on how to get them to stick around after their kids are born? Asking for a friend.
Re: The biology of dads
#3Any ideas on how to get them to stick around after their kids are born? Asking for a friend.
Maybe remembering the fathers that after his kid is born there is a "hell" time of mostly 3-4 months where the baby will be adapting to you and vice-versa.
Then the baby sleeps gets longer and you can have 6-8h of sleep.
New fathers: Hold tight, after 3-4 months it gets way easier.
Re: The biology of dads
#4Any ideas on how to get them to stick around after their kids are born? Asking for a friend.
Well, I've got both of mine... but then, I always wanted kids. Their mom was biggest part of the issue. That's why I have them at every possible opportunity - which translates to: If I'm home, which I am most of the time, they're most likely with me.
Re: The biology of dads
#5Any ideas on how to get them to stick around after their kids are born? Asking for a friend.
Maybe remembering the fathers that after his kid is born there is a "hell" time of mostly 3-4 months where the baby will be adapting to you and vice-versa. Then the baby sleeps gets longer and you can have 6-8h of sleep. New fathers: Hold tight, after 3-4 months it gets way easier.
In my experience it's a lot longer than 3-4 months. Or perhaps it's hell for 3-4 months, then just purgatory for another couple of years. I have a 4-yo and 2.5-yo and my sleep has still not recovered. Just last night one of them woke up screaming, and this continues to happen about weekly. Being woken up in the middle of the night is one thing, being woken up in the middle of the night to the banshee screams of a young child is quite another.
Re: The biology of dads
#6Any ideas on how to get them to stick around after their kids are born? Asking for a friend.
Some people will stick around and some won't. I would avoid those who won't like the plague, not just as a potential significant other but even as a friend. I'm not saying that everyone who has lost custody of their child or doesn't see their child much is a horrible person, but I am saying that those people who aren't even _interested_ in raising their own children are not generally the kind of people I want influencing me. Parenthood is difficult, some people try really hard and it beats them, and there shouldn't be any shame in that, there should be help. I'm also not talking about people in that category.
Re: The biology of dads
#7Any ideas on how to get them to stick around after their kids are born? Asking for a friend.
By selecting them before the kid is born.
Re: The biology of dads
#8> The bodies and brains of fathers, not just mothers, are transformed through the love and labour of raising a child
There is a clear link in emotional bonding and hormonal changes of mothers associated with pregnancy and labour. At face value it sounds nice that fathers also experience hormonal changes due to bonding with their children.
However, I couldn't find any reference to the confounding of fathers just experiencing a T drop _caused_ by sleep deprivation?
Re: The biology of dads
#9Any ideas on how to get them to stick around after their kids are born? Asking for a friend.
custody battles, alimony laws, "committed, intimate relationship = you're now married against your will for living together" and other misandrist policies are responsible for demonstrating that men are typically desired only as a financial vehicle. courts & society don't care whether or not men are around to raise kids. if they did care, we wouldn't have such crooked, lopsided laws.
Re: The biology of dads
#10Sleep deprivation has long been known to cause memory loss. My kids, in the early '00s, would only sleep in the daytime. I lost most of my '90s.