Be More Unlikeable
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Be More Unlikeable
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Re: Be More Unlikeable
#2It's 404ing for now, so maybe the contents actually defy the title when I finally will get to RTFA. I have to say, I'm amused by a lot of the contrarian articles showing up on HN recently. There seems to be a growing tendency to shed a lot of the saccharine optimism of the last decade.
"Work on unimportant problems"
"Be more unlikeable"
"How to cope with "
"Why you should kill your parents"
Re: Be More Unlikeable
#3The only grime I have to pick with this article is it's applicability to all groups. The ability to behave as a jerk or be unlikeable without experiencing retaliation (not simply push back) is a privilege that a lot of underrepresented minorities don't have
Re: Be More Unlikeable
#4I don't think the current social climate is conducive to this advice anymore. It was probably helpful in around 2008 to 2015.
It's hard to think of a situation where being unlikable is an advantage, today. Even in situations pg likes to point out – for example, if you think for yourself, you often upset others – you can do that privately rather than publicly, and still get the same advantage.
EDIT: there is one situation where you must be “unlikable” in a certain sense: if you think a company should do x, and someone else with equal authority thinks it should do y, and the decision is important. But even then, it’s probably easier to convince them with social aikido (or to let yourself be convinced), not assert dominance.
Re: Be More Unlikeable
#5Money quote:
> Personally, I've long idolized Steve Jobs and Elon Musk. But most of our heroes got to where they are by being unlikeable, not likable.
I fundamentally disagree with that view of being an asshole as an important part of success, but I also feel it has been rehashed an incredible amount of times already.
A slightly different take on this is the "don't rock the boat" mentality. This is usually a counter productive advice for anyone in a creative field, and pushing against settled ideas, trying things that people are not comfortable exploring is a valuable trait.
It can mean confrontation, refutal from a majority of people, and pushing these ideas requires a strong character. But I think there is a fine line between being firm and strong on ones opinion and being a jerk.
Re: Be More Unlikeable
#6It's 404ing for now, so maybe the contents actually defy the title when I finally will get to RTFA. I have to say, I'm amused by a lot of the contrarian articles showing up on HN recently. There seems to be a growing tendency to shed a lot of the saccharine optimism of the last decade. "Work on unimportant problems" "Be more unlikeable" "How to cope with " "Why you should kill your parents" I wonder if these are port…
I managed to get the article to load - it is content-free. It's just the headline, with a very weak argument attached (the old "difficult people make stuff happen").
Re: Be More Unlikeable
#7Money quote: > Personally, I've long idolized Steve Jobs and Elon Musk. But most of our heroes got to where they are by being unlikeable, not likable. I fundamentally disagree with that view of being an asshole as an important part of success, but I also feel it has been rehashed an incredible amount of times already. A slightly different take on this is the "don't rock the boat" mentality. This is usually a counter…
Yup, the other popular one is being contrarian. Its a dned epidemic at the moment, I find people arguing things for no other reason than to sound smart bt challenging, usually on a technicality, a really obvious assumption any normal person would take at face value.
Re: Be More Unlikeable
#8The only grime I have to pick with this article is it's applicability to all groups. The ability to behave as a jerk or be unlikeable without experiencing retaliation (not simply push back) is a privilege that a lot of underrepresented minorities don't have
> underrepresented minorities
To paraphrase Brene Brown, any conversation on privilege that excludes class is bullshit. The ability to be unlikable without it ruining your life (never mind using it to your advantage) is largely a privilege of class. No one in 2020 is immune to being "cancelled". But if you have money, it won't ruin your life.
Re: Be More Unlikeable
#9I don't think the current social climate is conducive to this advice anymore. It was probably helpful in around 2008 to 2015. It's hard to think of a situation where being unlikable is an advantage, today. Even in situations pg likes to point out – for example, if you think for yourself, you often upset others – you can do that privately rather than publicly, and still get the same advantage. EDIT: there is one situa…
I think the article's title is click bait. It goes on to essentially say that not conforming to others' ideas isn't necessarily a bad thing, and often contributes to success. Seems pretty obvious to me.
The author misconstrues (maybe only in order to twist the message to fit the title) being a jerk with being independent and taking risks.
Were some change-makers also jerks? Yeah, but it's not a rule, it's just more visible when that's the case.
Re: Be More Unlikeable
#10Money quote: > Personally, I've long idolized Steve Jobs and Elon Musk. But most of our heroes got to where they are by being unlikeable, not likable. I fundamentally disagree with that view of being an asshole as an important part of success, but I also feel it has been rehashed an incredible amount of times already. A slightly different take on this is the "don't rock the boat" mentality. This is usually a counter…
> I fundamentally disagree with that view of being an asshole as an important part of success
It can be correlation without being causation. The things that make such people successful—corporate authority, self-confidence, intellect, high standards, low tolerance for bullshit—may well expose or amplify the asshole tendencies lurking in all of us.