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We Are All Confident Idiots (2014)

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Re: We Are All Confident Idiots (2014)

#4
Being perceived as an unintelligent individual can lead to social rejection, and as with all things that pose the risk of social rejection, it will be avoided at all costs. When one feels that the group accepts them on their other merits, this reaction is defused. None of this seems particularly surprising - we humans have been avoiding social rejection for a very, very long time.

Re: We Are All Confident Idiots (2014)

#5
How do you work with an individual who _insists_ they understand how it all works? Even when faced with hard evidence that contradicts their assessments, I'm still told I don't understand or I misinterpreted their words - basically gas-lighting me.

Arguing leaves me unmotivated and frustrated. Giving in is the wrong path. Going to others doesn't seem to move the needle.

Help.

Re: We Are All Confident Idiots (2014)

#6
post #3

Interestingly those who tend to be more realistic in their self expectations are more prone to depression. False confidence may be the route to happiness or at least optimism.

That sort of observation is really tough to untangle from potential confounding variables though. Seems to me that the causation could go in the other direction just as easily - maybe people who generally have an optimistic outlook on things are more likely to overlook their own flaws and rate their abilities more highly, and vice-versa for depressive types?

Re: We Are All Confident Idiots (2014)

#7
post #5

How do you work with an individual who _insists_ they understand how it all works? Even when faced with hard evidence that contradicts their assessments, I'm still told I don't understand or I misinterpreted their words - basically gas-lighting me. Arguing leaves me unmotivated and frustrated. Giving in is the wrong path. Going to others doesn't seem to move the needle. Help.

There's a parable...

If you meet an a__hole in the morning, you met an a__hole. If you meet a__holes throughout the day, you are the a__hole.

Moral of the story, if it's just one person, let them be. You don't have to win.

Re: We Are All Confident Idiots (2014)

#9
post #5

How do you work with an individual who _insists_ they understand how it all works? Even when faced with hard evidence that contradicts their assessments, I'm still told I don't understand or I misinterpreted their words - basically gas-lighting me. Arguing leaves me unmotivated and frustrated. Giving in is the wrong path. Going to others doesn't seem to move the needle. Help.

Avoid interaction with the individual outside of the bear minimum required for work and try and learn to let things go. You'll be much happier for it. If not start looking for a new job.

Re: We Are All Confident Idiots (2014)

#10
post #5

How do you work with an individual who _insists_ they understand how it all works? Even when faced with hard evidence that contradicts their assessments, I'm still told I don't understand or I misinterpreted their words - basically gas-lighting me. Arguing leaves me unmotivated and frustrated. Giving in is the wrong path. Going to others doesn't seem to move the needle. Help.

Document, and shut up.

Document every time they say something false - time and date and medium, and exact words.

Shut up: for each instance, say once that they're wrong, then don't argue.

When it matters, when there's a decision where this person's view is threatening to sway matters in the wrong direction, go with a massive documentation dump - everything they've said on the subject, exact words and date and time and context, and evidence of what reality is.

Or else quit. If you quit, when you go, say why.

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