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Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

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Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#1

Post by msleona »

Hello,

I'd just like to give my two cents where I know no one gives a shit ever. I'm 29 years old. I finished with my Business Administration degree(major) and now I just feel completely LOST! Has anyone ever felt that way? You have the drive and motivation to get to your destination but once you are there -- you're left wondering -- "what else could I have done? What else is there to life? Because if this is all there is then I'm not happy." And, truth be told, I am not happy. I'd like to be something -- more than just an office person. More than just someone who works that 8-5 shift. I feel like a complete wreck. Has anyone ever felt this way?

I feel like I should go back to school but do I really want to rack up all that loan? I am already struggling right now. I just wish I knew where to start as a push and motivation.

What would you guys do if ya were in my shoes?

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#2

Post by gradschool »

If I were in your shoes, I'd find something I'm passionate about and build a business around it, especially with your knowledge of business administration. At 29 you've reached your prime :). I wouldn't go back to school and get more student loan debt because I could learn whatever I want for free from Kahn academy, or from all the videos put on line by Stanford and MIT, and I wouldn't work for peanuts in somebody else's office, but might consider an offer with a lot of equity. (Sorry for my dumb opinions. I'm just hoping to keep this thread alive long enough for someone smarter than me to join in.)

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#3

Post by allendoerfer »

First check if you treat yourself like a machine or an animal, that needs maintenance. You can search for similar threads here, you will always find the typical answers: Enough sleep? Good food? Exercise? Social interaction?

Once you have all that covered I would take a step back and get some vacation. You seem to already have an idea what you want to do, so that is good. Maybe try to specify it a bit more and lay out the steps to get there.

One of these steps could be going back to school. If you are not sure whether you want to take a step, I would go like this:

1. List alternatives

2. Order by likelihood of success

3. Take first you think you can do and still stay sane. You have to know yourself whether or not you are a person that can take on debt and likes to go to school.

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#5

Post by Karawebnetwork »

I'm feeling the exact way after having been told indirectly that the path I have undertaken this year was a waste of time for the company I work at. (Branching out from my job description and taking more tasks)

This made me take a look at the job market and now I feel like I have a lot of doors open to me where I would otherwise be too scared/comfortable to leave.

The dread and anger, the feeling of being stuck, they all turned into excitement.

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#6

Post by sevenless »

You aren't wrong. Most of us are stuck in conformist, drab and conservative societies, where we're forced to participate in the market economy. This is soul-crushing, and bad for nearly everyone, but especially those in poor countries.

I recommend:

1. Don't work hard. Try to reduce your productivity.

2. Don't work long hours. Reduce your working week to the minimum necessary. Most university graduates earn enough to live comfortably on 10 or 20 hours work per week.

3. Have less stuff. Go outside more, even if it's to play Pokemon Go.

4. Do things for other people.

5. Try to lead an innovative life. Don't wear a tie.

6. Seek to abolish the existing world order.

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#7

Post by mig_ »

allendoerfer wrote: post #3

First check if you treat yourself like a machine or an animal, that needs maintenance. You can search for similar threads here, you will always find the typical answers: Enough sleep? Good food? Exercise? Social interaction? Once you have all that covered I would take a step back and get some vacation. You seem to already have an idea what you want to do, so that is good. Maybe try to specify it a bit more and lay ou…

^^ This

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#9

Post by h_o »

Yes. I did a masters in computer science, and realised I do not want to be an office person either. It doesn't make me feel fulfilled. I want to actually help people, not help companies make money. I since started studying again and did the medical school entrance exam equivalent in my country and got a borderline acceptable score on my first go. I find out early August I have a place or not starting September (4 more years of studying).

Re: Ask HN: When you feel stuck in life

#10

Post by danso »

A lot of people have felt that way, including me. And looking back, I can see that I was wrong, no matter how absolute my feelings felt at the time.

But that's something you can hear and not believe, so motivational get-livin-or-get-dyin sentiments will only get you so far. Setting a few long-term goals and then a bunch of short-term goals is what you'll want to do so that this down time isn't completely wasted. But thinking about these takes concerted effort, just like any other endeavor.

You say you've just finished your degree. Have you found a job yet? Don't think of getting a job as the end-all fulfillment of your life. At the very least, it can be a stepping stone to other unforseen opportunities, i.e. Woody Allen's aphorism about 60 to 90 percent of life being about just showing up.

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